Uggh, I've been dry for 17 days, and it's starting to get to me. A little over two weeks ago, I was shooting a ridiculous amount of H every day. I didn't have any withdraws after I quit, but a couple of days ago, I started having these cravings...it's more of a mental thing right now. I've been super productive in the meantime, exercising, eating right, and getting a lot of gardening and home repair work done, plus I landed a new video editing job that pays bank, but sometimes the stress of everyday problems just makes me want to get really high...I'm waiting for my pills to come from the mail-order pharmacy, hopefully the middle of next week. I haven't been sober for this long in the last four years. I can definitely see the benefits, but I think that this productive lifestyle will make me cut down my use to twice a week or less, since I have so much on my plate. I just want to get away from the stigma of every opiate user (especially IV) is a useless person that can't even hold a job, ya know? What kinds of jobs do you people have? Do you consider your opiate use an aid to relaxation and productivity, or is it hurting you instead?
union electrician....laid off at the moment.....i'd say a benefit, lots of climbing opiates keep the pain at bay, and gives u that little zing to get through the day......
It (the new lifestyle) won't help keep your addiction manageable, Polishman. I think you know that. Once you are hooked, complete abstinence from your drug(s) of choice is your only choice. So fer shit sake don't go back to the old lifestyle. Maybe after you sort out why you get addicted, whereas others dont, you can resume using with some degree of safety. However I found, after a year or so clean and sober, that going back to my old lifestyle was the very last thing I wanted. Sure life hurts. But once you sort out why it hurts you so much, and not the majority of "normal" (retch!) people, it will cease to hurt. The greatest lesson I learned in 25 years of total sobriety was "We are as sick as our secrets". That is, once you are totally open and frank about everything, without exception, nobody can hurt you anymore. I feel for you, pal. I know it sounds corny but just take it "a day at a time" and get in contact with a group like Narcotic Anonymous, or similar, who are also trying to get the monkey off their back. Good luck, Polishman.
Good for you, 17 days can be a hell if you would have had physiological symptoms of craving...how you didn't after that long on any type of opiates is quite amazing if you ask me. If you get nothing at all from this break except to detox your body for a while, then this is still a good thing. Keep your head up If your meant to keep on doing them, they'll find you again. Just please remember not to take a dose you were used to when/if you start again, take it slow...you can always take more, not less.
