Have you ever totally understand people who wanted to kill themselves?

for any reason while on psychedelics?

 

Not in the sense of ending it all, definitely not.

 

Yes, during a high-dose pharmahuasca trip. Also during high dose mushrooms + high dose DMT hits combination.

 

yeah actually, heavy mushroom trip.

I figgured out that we`re trapped in our reality and the only escape into the perfect abyss is death.. but I was tripping to hard to walk across the room, much less kill myself, so I figgured I`d do it later.

 

No, never. I've had some seriously horrible trips and I always know it'll end so I never feel like ending it shortly.....that's just a waste of drugs.

 

I don't think he necessarily meant have any of us wanted to end our lives during a trip. Just if we've understood the suicidal behaviours of others. I've never wanted to kill myself in a psychedelic state, but I have come to full understanding of those who do.

My five hit lsd breakthrough. I understood the "death impulse" very very innately.

 

You've never wanted to kill yourself?

 

Yeah

 

oh I never could imagine that driving urge that makes people pull the trigger until like my first time having a strong trip

 

Never actually in a suicidal way, but plenty of times done stuff thats put me in harms way without even realising it.

Its weird though, everbody is different, never been one to really freak out on pyschs, nor get agro when drunk, but E of all things, too much of that and I find myself running through highway traffic

 

I can't say I ever totally understood or I would have done it. Definitely can empathize with them and understand to a degree, because I've sadly pondered this in the past. Not anymore though, and I haven't had such silly thoughts in quite awhile now.

 

No. I dont want to depress the shit out of my parents (and extended family ) for the rest of their lives. A bit of a selfish move if you have ties, imo.

 

After reading more posts, I felt like clarifying:

I can understand it while not tripping, no problem.

I guess I may be different from others, and I know in some ways tripping might make you understand others more, but.... I guess it's similar to the way I do not understanding drunk people or violent/angry people when tripping. They really perplex me. Sometimes to the point of actually being confused, like, "what is wrong with these guys?" and not being able to understand what is causing the behavior.

In the same way, ending life (in the sense of snuffing out existence) just doesn't make sense to me while I'm tripping.

I have thought about death as the ultimate trip in the sense of completely letting go of this world, but not as a way to end it all, while tripping.

(It may be my lack of experience with different chemicals or maybe I just got the bad acid.)

 

The only time I understand anything about people is while I'm tripping. When sober I feel like everyone is just fucking with me because their behaviour is so irrational.

 

i have a hard time understanding why someone would want to kill themselves. given a TERRIBLE situation, i guess i can understand a little, but there always seems to be a better option. i would probably have a harder time understanding it while tripping, since i love life even more so in that state of mind.

i have thought about the act of killing oneself, as in just how EXTREME it is! some uber-serious shit. i get scared thinking of it, and my heart is beating fast after typing this out. i've wondered what dying feels like. i guess it could be a lot of feelings or no feeling, depending on the situation. do you know it's coming a minute or so before-hand, or is it just bam, dead?! ugh

 

exact opposite thing happens actually... it seems like a common theme for my trips is for me to come to the conclusion that almost no matter what, the show must go on, the game has to be played, and why not? It seems like, with mushrooms especially, I find myself often thinking about the last three years of my life, how terrible they were. Being locked in a mental institution for 7 months of my life, in inpatient rehabs for another 4. Fucking not being there for my fathers death, sticking fucking oxy in my arm... and when I think of those times, all I can think of is I got through it, and that if I had to, for whatever reason I would do it again. When thoughts drift to even spending in entire life in prison (probably my biggest fear/phobia), I imagine somehow I would do that to. What I'm trying to say is that, when in a tripping state of mind, even when thinking about living through the worst case scenarios, my worst fears (going back to jail), I find resilience. For instance, especially after being torn up by high dose mushies, do I find this. I guess theres nothing like egodeath to make you appreciate life.

That is not to say i don't feel empathy for people who want to kill themselves, hell I was one of those people for a short point in my troubles, but its more like this feeling of wishing I could help them, let them see what ive seen, how beautiful life is. Just listening to Alan Watts rap about life and death when tripping can make me ball like a baby (not sad tears, but tears of amazement at life, very cleansing tears).

 

Don't have time to read this right now just have to say... I had the most serious suicide attempt when I was 15 that any doctor or hospital employee had ever seen, and I was in a coma for 3 days with kidney failure and a 5% chance to live.

I didn't want to live, period. Most people want attention. I did not want to be a part of this world.

I was not on psychedelics, but psychedelics have helped me to want to live, since then.

 

this made me giggle

 

If you're gonna put it like that, what did you do?

that's nuts

 

Don't want to give people ideas... if you really want it, you should find what can cause kidney failure, it's direct, I researched it for a long while.

Life can be too good, though, I have learned this through extensive cannabis use, and some psychs LSD and shrooms helped a lot. MDMA more recently tried for first time was a very powerful force of change for me, very positive, one of the best experiences of my life that leaves a glowing memory