Sex with friends- how do you feel?

I'm in kind of a weird situation right now with my best friend. I'm really attracted to him. When I'm around him or even when I think about him, my hormones just go crazy.

I want to have sex with him because we're close and I trust him. I would feel safe with him BECAUSE I know him so well and I know he won't just treat me like a sex object.

Problem is, his thinking is quite opposite of mine. He doesn't want to be intimate with me because I'm so close to him. He would rather have one night stands with complete strangers, and it's got me so confused. Why would someone want to get close with a stranger rather than someone they know and love?

I've noticed a lot of men are like this, so I'm asking everyone this question---

Would you rather be intimate with a friend or a stranger and why? What makes a stranger better than a friend or vice versa?

 

Come on, guys! I really need an answer to this.

 

Friend. At least typically.

But I has a girlfriend, so if we were to have sex with anyone else, stranger sounds nice.

There's a big appeal in a friend for me because I don't trust people, I don't like many people, etc. etc.
But I can also see the appeal of a stranger, because there are no strings attached, you might never see each other again, and things are less likely to get messy.


In your situation, I certainly wouldn't push the matter, by the way.

 

my wife frowns on it but if she didn't I'd be game for sex with a friend or a stranger

 

Oh that's easy, he probably wants no-strings-attached-sex and sleeping with a close friend could possibly tangle those strings.....then again it sounds like you haven't made a move yet, so try, see what happens he might be more game than you think

 

because alot of men like myself are afraid of that intimate connection and what kind of commitment it requires, trust me most men are all tuff on the outside but are more afraid of getting their feelings hurt then most women so it is much easier to just fuck random hoes and not worry about it than it is to worry about commitment and emotions. I know because i speak from experience, i have a girlfriend and we are working on it but it is really not an easy thing.

Also on a side note modern media and society instills that this behavior is acceptable for men so most men tend to blindly follow that trend

 

sluts make my dick go limp.

 

My only experiences with friends with benefits or even just trying to have sex with a friend with "no strings attached" have turned into heartbreak or even a relationship.. one person will always care more than the other.

 

Do you think you can have a fuck buddy that's a good friend without it turning into a relationship?

 

Thank you. That makes sense. My friend knows I really like him, and I know he's wanted me before too. This seems like a really logical reason for him to lose interest.

Relationships have never really been his thing. If he ever has one (which is rare) it lasts usually for about a week before he dumps the bitch. And the purpose of it is most likely just to get in her pants.

 

Women who think straight men are their "friends," regardless of whether they've had sex, don't really understand men...

 

You know what they say: for every beautiful woman there is a guy that is tired of screwing her

I can bet that if you went out for drinks with him something would happen. Go on!! Do it!

 

I would rather have sex with a friend IF it meant that we would continue to be friends.

If, on the other hand, said friend wants to turn the friendship into a possessive relationship by means of sex, I would rather have sex with a stranger.

The appeal of being single and having sex with many strangers is that I get to retain ownership of myself.

When I'm not on crack.

 

there are a few risks when sleeping with your friends: 1) you fall in love with each other (mutually beneficial) 2) only one person falls in love with the other 3)you both get a little grossed out and realize you're really more like brother and sister

it sounds like you're one of the few females this guy likes and respects. maybe hes afraid he'll care too much or fuck things up if he sleeps with you

 

Or, maybe he's just genuinely not sexually attracted to her or genuinely wishes to be single. How could we know?

 

this.


interestingly, everything said about men in the OP actually describes most women and is not remotely true about most men.

 

Well I kind of know because of how he treats me... He's been in this cycle of flirting with me, leading me on, and then backing off because "we're too close." I just don't understand men sometimes.

 

you ever ask him why?

 

Yes. Problem is, he is incredibly clever (more so than I) and if he wants to avoid a question, he knows how to do so very easily. I think he feels like I'm criticizing him when I bring it up or something.

 

Sex with friends is definitely better than sex with enemies.

Peace Out,
Rev J