So I've got this pretty sweet writing gig that my friend has been jealous of for a long time. He recently got fired and made plans to move to Europe, but before he did, he asked if I could get him hired to do the same work I do. I said I'd think about it. He then found my boss's number online and asked him if he could do my work - not to replace me, obviously, but supplement my work. I was at that time the only one doing writing at my company. My boss "hired" him (it's commission work so there's no risk hiring him) and my "friend" moved to Europe. Now, he's doing the same work I'm doing, and I can't put my finger on why I'm so pissed off, but I sure as hell am pissed. He isn't necessarily taking work away from me, but in an odd way he's my competitor. And he's been doing a great job so far, to my annoyance. But more than that, it's that he went and called my boss without my permission. Do I have a right to be upset here? Again, I don't see any real reason to be that angry, but I am...
Not really I don't blame you. It's your dream and you take it seriously. The whole going behind your back and calling your boss thing was a little trashy. Especially when you probably would have set it up for him, and it would have been on better terms instead of this sneaky caniving shit. Anyways, stay focused on your own job. You don't know that he's better then you at what you do. Just because he's been doing well doesn't mean he'll suceed in the long term. If you focus on what you want in life, and where you want to go you'll get there.
Ethically the crossed over a line by contacting your employer himself. That he was hired on his own merit is unclear from the post and you would have to be the employer to be able to actually answer that one. It does seem that he was given that you did not contact anyone actually for him. It appears that he has had advancement in a sense that you have not had. Perhaps that is the root of your angst. Since it is a situation that you can not change, you will have to either accept the way this has played out or it is going to cause conflict between you. If you can not accept it then it is likely that your friendship will not do well and that possibly it could end up having a consequence for you also with your employment, depending on your employer. Good luck.
If someone wins the lottery down the street does that make you poorer or richer? Does this scenario change your agreement with your employer?
You guys are right, I should make the best of things and move on. I'm partly jealous and partly miffed that he went behind my back like that. But the lottery analogy makes me think that you missed the point of my dilemma.
If he told your employer that he was friends with you, and it may be the case that this helped him get the job: than it was wrong. Using you in that way isn't fair when you didn't give permission. However, if he talked to your boss without mentioning you and got the job because he has the skill, there is no reason to be upset. Like you said, it's just better to move on than stay angry.
