I want to include my story in the already expansive number of subjective case studies that demonstrate the successful treatment of depression and other mental problems using psychedelics. In retrospect I was not a very well-adjusted teenager. I constantly felt awkward, alienated, and hopeless. I had few friends, lousy communication skills, self-destructive habits, random crying, suicidal thoughts, etc. I was depressed. All the symptoms were there, but at the time I lacked the perspective I needed to realize it and find a way to feel better on my own or through therapy or some such thing. During my last year in high school I started smoking a ton of weed, all the time. I felt like that helped a little, but eventually I just developed a crippling dependence on it and overall my irrational and destructive patterns of thought remained. In college I sought out help from the campus councilors, but I didn't believe that it would help me (plus they said I had to stop smoking weed) so I stopped going after 2 or 3 sessions. By that time I had a little experience with psychedelics (shrooms, lsd, and lsa) but I hadn't had any particularly amazing profound trips. But at some point while tripping-and I don't exactly remember if it was one specific trip or over the course of a few trips-I had some serious life-changing epiphanies. I realized that the whole point of it all is living in the moment and enjoying the extremely limited time we have and all that bullshit. I perceived all of existence at once as a beautiful, interconnected and dynamic process of life and death and matter in motion that we only get to experience momentarily, and this was exactly the perspective I needed in order to overcome my own worries and insecurities. I'm probably not 100% cured. But since then in general I feel MUCH happier and more optimistic, and for over a year I've had no suicidal thoughts or bouts of debilitating sadness at all. For once in my life I'm totally ok with myself, and I know that without the psychedelic perspective I would have probably never felt this way. Sure it's not for everyone, but I think it worked wonders for me
Yea totally capable of that. I say it works in that favor. But I have found even some of the most dissolving experiences I seem to come back to my very isolated position in humanity, resentful of it surrounding me too closely. I don't know if anybody knows anything about externally imposed boxes. For some they're unavoidable and perhaps extremely hard to overcome. And this isn't even to say the box is a creation of hate, maybe it's love. Love could never work in some folks favor, and is something they must hunt vigorously. Sometimes love is cold, cold as ice. Once upon a time, dissolution was the most liberating feeling, and I explored a new perspective so alone but so happy and untouchable. I had a few kind and close souls in my life at the time, but as life changes I get further away (physically and circumstantially), into the cold world of love. I know my options, I know what choices I need to make. I'm just not sure I want to be going on a wild goose chase, when I was the wild goose chased.
In relation to the OP instead of complaining about relative circumstances, I mean to say. New perspectives do not always solve old challenges. Although it definitely helps to be able to look at something through multiple perspectives.
I also don't intend on discrediting or devaluing the strides you have made and/or experienced in your life. I have found similarly to how you found your ground, a middle ground between two mental realizations of my life than need not necessarily be explained for this purpose beyond the archaic sense of duality. I have through this been able to remain detached from my sadness, although it is there, suicide is much much further away. I guess I still have that teeny weeny bit of faith in love to bring me through to the end, I'm sure.
I've always wanted to try psychedelics, but I've always been afraid. A dude from my neighborhood when I was growing up took acid once and went running all over the neighborhood naked. He never got to live it down and I never got to live it up...
Yup. It's absolutely incredible how well they worked for me. Thank you Albert Hofmann and Alexander Shulgin, for your catalysts to awe.
Why is there no mention that psychedelics are far from the real solution? "You have to be specific, if you want to be terrific" - Giant Panda Guerilla Dub Squad Liberation requires effort.
The real solution? I know my solution, and that psychedelics were a part of it. And most actions require effort, but thanks for the reminder.
Not The real solution. I'm not trying to sell anything. I'm saying forcing your mind into opening new doors, is not an automatic key for liberation from depression and other mental entrapment's. Although they certainly can and have provided an important step, especially in my case. But as I have continued psychedelic use I also found that as much as they feel like medicine for my soul, I'm subjected continuously to the same forces of human mind that we all are in the long run, no matter how much acid I take or how dissolved into the eternal I feel from drugs. Most existing help and information on this spiritual matter will tell you can't have one thing without the other. And that the one part is an integral part of balancing yourself. It's a matter of you using it instead of it using you. So similarly psychedelics take you deep into one side of things. Learn as much as you can whilst there and whilst returning.
I am in the process of the latter and I will re-enter the process of learning THERE, Either in meditation, or the next time I take acid. Which is soon. I'm far from NOT being an acid user.
I agree on what you said, just want to add few things. When you learn whatever you learn there, you must start implementing that knowledge in your day to day life, to try to better yourself and to be better person tomorrow then you are today. I was far from depressed or having any problems in my life, actualy I was happy person always, but psychedelics showed me the way of love and compashion, to try to do only things I think are good, to think twice if something might hurt somebody before I do it, they showed me to be better person. They showed me that I have wife and kids and that I can not be selfish and hurt myself, because they will suffer, so after one trip when I realised that, I quit smoking after 20 years of smoking 2,5 packs (50 cigarettes) a day. Just like that, no smoking patches, nicotin gums, nothing, just a feeling that if I die from lung cancer my kids will cry and it would be stupit from me not to be there and see their kids and be there for them when they need me. I can go like this forever, but to cut the story short, there is always something you can learn, or to realise about yourself that can be changed for better, and don't ever stop changing for better. Psychedelics are there as a tool to help you see the world and yourself from different perspective so you can change it for better, any other reason for using them is abusing drug and gives it a bad name (at least in my own oppinion). Offcourse not everybody immidiately knows how to benefit from them, but after a year of using it, you should be able, or just stop because you are one of those that shouldn't be taking them at all.
So has your social skills been revamped a little after the experience? Or does the trip just just allow you to be okay with this, or both?
Necropostin' ooowooow yeahhh Neeecropostinnnn cause its a good poste. heayyyeayyyayahhhh ....... wheres the bump if your baked thread
