Coming out- the bi-sexual version..starring..me

lmao! <3

 

I remember being 10 years old. Everyday I'd play with these barbies I kept in a wide wooden storage box. I must have had about 100 of the damn things. When I used to play with them, i'd make them go shopping, have sleepovers, resolve simple problems like how to fit all the barbie outfits in the car by putting them in little suitcases in the backseat. Things were so simple then, the only thing you had to worry about was whether or not your parents were seving broccoli that night.I also made the girl barbies kiss, I made them kiss secretly. My mom would often walk by bedroom to check up on me, it was my secret. I'd take off their clothes and make the girl barbies fondle each other. I used to go over to my friends house down the street, and her dad had this rule about only bring Barbies over that had clothes on. He thought without clothes on it would be perverse, that we would be up to something. One day I had a friend over, we'll call her Sara. Sara also lived next door and i'd often run through my neighbors backyard, and jump a fence as a shortcut to get to her house. We used to climb this one big tree in her backyard and try to get to the very top, we'd play barbies together, sometimes polly pockets and eat popsicles in the summer heat. One day she came over to my house and we were in a guest room that was once occupied by my grandmother. We were laying under the covers and I told her that I found out something, that this feels really great. I took of my panties, and just layed there naked. I told her how great it felt, the feeling of the sheets against my naked body. The movement of my hips in the bed and how she would love it too. She was hesitant at first, like she knew it seemed off but was persuaded and removed hers as well. I told her how great it felt, she agreed it felt great. That was it. I put my panties back on and when Pamela had to leave I had this rush of guilt. I started crying and said what have we done..what have we done. She said ' relax it's not like we had sex', not like I really had any idea the details of that anyways, we didn't really do much of anything in reality. I ran next door where my mom often visited and told my her right away. I was crying and I felt terrible and she told me to calm down but she looked stressed about it. She said did Sara do it too? and I said " yes", she said " then it's normal". She told me to go home, so I did. I spent the rest of my youth with a constant curiousity towards other females. I felt wrong and disgusting as I was raised to be hetero-sexual girl. That curiousity only went so far. It took me a long time to come to terms with who I'am, what I like. Having obsessive compulsive disorder and constantly associating my thoughts towards women disgusting and have ticks because of it. I didn't see how what I like is a normal variation of human interest. That having feelings for women is completly normal. I'm 20 years old and i'm only coming to terms with this now.

 

You're going to talk yourself back to strait at the way it's going

 

:rofl:

 

Hahahahahaa

 

Homosexuality and pedophilia! U should be ashamed young lady hahaha

 

All homosexuals are pedophiles, didn't you know? :frown:

Seriously, who the fuck came up with that stupid fucking logic the fucking fuck.

 

You jump up and down at everyone else becuase they assume bisexuality is all about sex, and yet you do the exact same thing. When you do the childhood memory recall thing you just talk about the naughty parts, the parts that have to do with sex.

If you were really who you say you are, the tale would have been about your first big crush on a member of the same gender, or the ache of being seperated from a member of the same gender early on in your life.

You get yourself a new gal pal, introduce her to your dad as your new girlfriend, you rub each others tummies in front of him to make him uncomfortable, then three days late he hears the both of you cackling like hens in a henyard over some hot guy, the neighbours gardener or someone. Your dad is going to know you are full of crap, or worse he's going to think "wow, she's just like her mother was at that age"


Chronic Tom and I are at opposite ends of that gay/straight spectrum, but we are both male, we both get a perspective that you girls dont see. We both know as a 20 yr old girl you dont know the meaning of horny yet, you wont until you get to your prime 30+, or pregnant. It wont be till that time that it hits you, just how many girls are bi, most of them operating in secret. Or to put it another way, it wont hit you till then just how many other girls were playing with naked barbies at 10, running around fiddling with other girls at 20 cos they were too frustrated with guys of that age.

And whats likely to really piss you off then, is when you work out your mom was one of those girls, and she didnt tell you, kept up the act because she was focused on whats best for her (grandkids) over whats best for you

 

What's with you trying to make my mom bi all the time lmao
just because I showed the sexual side and didn't get into complete detail my entire history doesn't mean shit.

 

We were both 10?

 

Lol easy girl it was a joke. I know u were both 10. Im not seriously pickin on u. I wouldnt do that

 

You need some therapy. For real......I have read your responses to other people's posts about coming out and you pretty much said the same thing about how they dont know if their parents are gay or not blah blah blah..........do you have some gay parent issues??? Damn...... how do you jump from A to Z sooo fast. What if her mom is bi or experimented??? Does it change anything? What if both of her parents are gay and hiding it??? Does it change that the experience was hard for her??? What is your point?? Oh and about not knowing what horny is until you are 30+ where did you get that? ARE YOU A WOMAN???? NOOOOOO.....so how can you speak for us?

I am not trying to be disrespectful but your responses dont even seem to be directly focused on what people are saying. You have got some pent up anger. But yeah.....I do agree with you when you say more people are bi than we think.

 

Its a chicken vs the egg thing

 

You're a dumb fuck.

 

someone is being a bit testy

 

that might not be the case, but in terms of number of victims. studies show that homosexuals usually do molest far more victims than straight molesters do. and an overwhelming amount of gays have admitted they were touched as a child. just too disturbing to dismiss as hogwash.

 

Just did a search on this and from all the articles I have seen - statistics show that it is in fact straight men who seem to molest more often.

But, Fundamentalist Christians have tried to claim that it is the gay population. I wonder why

 

Man Wildflowers, I read up to page 4 and most of this psuedo psychological bullshit these people are talking about is wack.. screw all that ingorant shit.
I congradulate you on coming out to your parents, I can only imagine how hard that might be. Thats one conversation I doubt I shall ever have with my parents, maybe some day way far off in the future if it felt just right.. I might tell my mom. And also how hard it might be that they're ignoring it, kind of stings a bit.. pretending you to be something you're not to suit their own dreams and dictations of your life and how they "think" it should or want it to be.

Part of the reason I'm taking off on a motorcycle journey from good ol California to Colorado, so I can finally.. for the First time in my life; give head to a guy and experience my bi-sexuality as I've dreamed of doing for ..shit, at least half of my 22 years on this planet we call earth.

Don't feel too discouraged though that they ignored what you told them.. both of my parents know I'm bi, they've caught me looking at pictures and can just tell.. just small things here and there a parent might pick up on. They do not acknowledge the fact of what I am, nor do they wish to speak about it; but they know. Its how a lot of parents are, and with their upbringings its understandable I suppose.
I'm happy for you though, thats a big step.. just saying it at all, and especially to the parentals is about the hardest of people to tell too, especially at first. So kudos to you =)

Its all just love anyway, it really shouldn't matter of sexual orientation, or religious beliefs, or race or creed or any other such thing. It's all just LOVE. I've noticed as well, most of the people (kind of like what somebody else said in this thread) most everyone I know is bisexual to some point. The Gays being on the left, the straight on the right but most everyone is in the middle to some degree; and its true. So when anyone responds out of hostility, acting homophobic or ignorantly towards you or gay/bisexuality - its most likely because they themselves are living in fear, deep down inside they are hiding and trying to convince themselves subconsciously (sometimes even consciously) that they are not bi or gay; something they've been doing since they were young because of societys conditioning. They are living in fear, its really what it is. But I'm rambling and I could go on for days about this.

Its all just love, and love is all good.. in any way, shape or form. Love IS LOVE.

I love you Wildflowers, and again.. congrats, you've just taken a big step forward in your journey of life, an amazing thing; enjoy the fruits of life (pun semi intended, lol). Please, feel free message me.. I would love to talk more about this with you and anything else too. It would be nice to know somebody kind of on the same page.. ya know? Anyway..
Much Love and Peace
Dosia - That Barefoot Beflowered Treehugging Hippy

 

You really are a beautiful person, I loved your post. I've been on the forums for awhile now and I've realized that alot of the people who post here probably shouldn't. It's supposed to be about freedom of expression, I will acknowledge that. At the same time alot of people abuse that right, push their views and their fundamentalist beliefs on other posters and believe that they are entitled to hide behind their keyboard and spread hate online.

It's nice to see someone so open and accepting of others, and so self aware. I hope your journey to Colorado is amazing, and when you get there I hope your expectations are met.

I love you too, and you are also welcome to message me anytime.

-Shayna

 

I found it funny, so I had to point it out.. You used a code name for her, then used her actual name lol

It also took me a long time to come to terms with who I am, and what I like. It was only this year of my life that I started actually feeling okay about it. All of my other years I felt horrible, disgusted by it.. trying to push it away and not wanting it, nor wanting to believe it. It was really fucking hard as a kid, a teen, a young adult.. I hated it, I hated myself.
Nowadays though, I've coming to find.. that it is actually a blessing in disguise, I love it. I am so happy and proud to be who I am! I fucking love it.
I've yet to experince it, but soon enough.. I feel much more free, so much more open and okay.. women and men are beautiful, and I find both sexually attractive, and both attractive on a much deeper level.. though as for marriage, I know my soulmates out there. I love her already. I would never marry a guy, just not my thing.. perhaps a boyfriend for a while? Thats about it though.
Anyway.. feel happy about who you are, it truely is a blessing.. as we get twice the selection for our life partners! hahaha! Truely though, its amazing.. live life up. Maybe a change of scenery.. to a place more accepting and open than your home area? I know not your place of residence or your current situation really. I just get the feeling though, a change of scenery somewhere more accepting.. just might be amazing and wonderful. An exploration of self, and of being.. such as what I am about to embark upon.. a spiritual journey and conscious exploration of self and also of my sexuality.

Much Peace and Love Shayna,
Dosia/William