I am drifting things are shifting gorgeous flowers with bright colours feeling mellow wobbly like jello this deal is so surreal planes bending hoping that it's never ending I decided to give this whole poetry writing a shot. Let me know what you think...
I like it man... reminds me of my own poetry in a'otta ways... cool shit... couldn't guess what it's about jk jk
I see you have some talent for imagery. Like a lot of people beginning to write poetry, I think you may be getting bogged down with rhyme. It takes a lot of skill to make frequent use of rhyme without it sounding unnatural. Poetry doesn't have to rhyme, of course. Try writing something in free verse: just let the imagery flow to whatever rhythm seems appropriate.
Yeah, but it seems easier with rhyme. Whenever I write without rhyme... it just ends up sounding weird. Thanks for the tip though, I'll keep on practicing I guess..
Try reading some free verse stuff, if you haven't read much before. It's a whole different way of looking at poetry which you need to get a feel for.
Yeah I've been reading more and more free verse... but they still seem harder to write than rhyme. It's hard to let go of this rhyme. Ok I attempted to write another poem... I am sitting in between these four walls with crunched up paper & few missed telephone calls I am thinking of something to write thinking away hard into deep, dark night but nothing comes to mind maybe if I let myself unwind my thoughts will flow & maybe this poem will start to grow. The main reason I'm writing these, is for school... for one of my class assignments. Very zen class...
alright kid, that zorba guy is right: gas the rhymes. your passion is there but rhyming is a restriction which is not what poetry is about. expressing your thoughts in such a confining way not only frustrates your readers, but must also get sand in yer panties. writing rhymes means searching for that last perfect word...where free-style lets you search for all perfect words...sand free and meaningful. r.
