The (New) Thread of LIES!!!

curiosity didn't kill the cat, it was me hahaha!

 

My cat is afraid of mice...

 

I just swallowed a mouse whole.

 

I make up Norm Macdonalds jokes.

 

I sing in the shower...

 

Pink is my favorite colour, I skip down the lane in my frilly pink dress and my pink sparkly shoes, dancing with my little pink bag like a sick little moron.

 

I'm making frog/snail/dandelion stew for din din.

 

I think that sounds delicious...^^^

 

i'm in the guinness book of records for possessing the fastest neuron connections in the west...

 

I like to burn kittens to stay warm.

 

i like to have crazy orgy parties after smoking crack and shooting heroin.

 

I prefer to plug heroin up my ass

 

I love to get out of bed when its still dark outside...

 

I had a crayon for lunch, the blue ones are the best.

 

just drank a galllon on pond water. (tadpoles included)

 

I just put my nose inside a hamper full of used socks

Smells amazing

 

zebra crossings in London are very safe.

 

I howl at the moon when its full....

 

I just ate a whole swan to myself.........BEEERRP.

 

i ejaculate rough-ground rhino horn, and when i'm done, i collect it all up by hand and feed it to the starving children on my estate, and the one that backs on to this one.... i do this for free and get no thanks for it!