i've been standing here at my computer off and on all morning

LOL, we are...

 

hahaha! really? how funny. so i guess i have!

see, people?

 

Be careful by the way, it can be contagious

*spiritual cough*

 

Wait, are you really ?

 

NOOOOO!

I'M mELtinggggggggg

 

Yep.

I speak in tongues and operate in other gifts of the Spirit. I even prophesied over somebody once.

 

yeah well, I just took up serpents in the name of the Lord this past weekend. the guy next to me died from a pit viper bite, but my faith was clearly stronger

 

I'm cursed with the native square, flat ass as well. All the weight I put on gave it a bit of roundness, but I hate being fat so I'll have my ugly, flat ass back in no time.

 

cheers to that, cuz.

at least you have lips, though. i got my dad's mouth and he gets to wear a 'stache.

 

Ah, but you have the better tits and eyes.

 

lol.

 

The other day in the grocery store there was this Hispanic girl probably in her early 20s who’s ass was so huge (but so perfectly shaped) that I couldn’t stop staring at it

I then looked to my right and there was this little girl sitting on a bench staring at me staring at this women’s ass.

Just before the wave of embarrassment hit; there was like this telepathy which passed between us which indicated a mutual understanding

I then walked out of the store.

Hotwater

 

there was a girl in my high school who used to wear half shirts and white bike shorts. she had the most exquisite body and the most mediocre face ever. but her butt, in the thong and white bike shorts was a joy to behold leaving english in the morning.

 

day in the life of ol Dave. Im just a dirty ol man

 

English my favorite class just behind Math & Science


H

 

my english teachers were so badass i still think of them and laugh. i love telling the english teacher stories.