Recently someone on the forum got upset that an old guy, let's say 65, would have sex with a young guy, let's say 27. That's only a 38 year spread. I have realized for years that young ppl turn me on (and why not). I wrote this article in 2004. That was before I got on MySpace and found out all sorts of guys, some young enuf to be my grandson, want to hook up with me. MySpace is new but sexual partners with decades difference in age is not. Ageing and Attraction to Youth By Shale Stone January 2004 Published: NUDE IQ, ( IMEN Quarterly) Winter 2003 pg. 26 This is an edited version of the original Having recently watched the 1999 movie Entrapment, where the main characters, Mac (Sean Connery, then 69) and Gin (Catherine Zeta-Jones, then 30), hint at a romantic attraction, it brought home my own realities of relating to people much younger than myself. Catherine Zeta-Jones and Sean Connery Entrapment In that movie, Gin seems infatuated with Mac, nearly 40 years her senior. Mac is clearly turned on by the beautiful young woman but portrayed his realization that she has so much life ahead of her while he, like myself, has more history than future. In a poll of readers of Film magazine, the scene where Connery bedded Zeta-Jones was voted by readers to be the second worst love scene, due to this age disparity. (The worst was Sharon Stone and Joe Pesci in the 1995 movie Casino, due to ... well you can imagine). Obviously, to some even the thought of such an age disparity between lovers, borders on the obscene, but that is not supported by the norm of celebrities' affairs. It is noteworthy that in real life the beautiful Zeta-Jones married Michael Douglas who is my age and 25 years older than her. Her portrayal in the movie of attraction to Sean Connery's older character could have come quite naturally to her. There is a more recent movie, "The Human Stain," in October 2003, where Anthony Hopkins (age 65) is having a romantic affair with Nicole Kidman (age 36). The age disparity of the characters is even greater, with Hopkins playing a 71-year-old college professor and Kidman playing a 34-year-old janitor. Some reviewers, like Rene Rodriguez of The Miami Herald claim that "the sight of Anthony Hopkins snuggling in bed and enjoying hot, torrid sex..." with Kidman derails the whole movie. This attitude brought home my own observations of how we older men internalize the fact that we are getting older. Nicole Kidman & Anthony Hopkins The Human Stain Here is the reality that I have observed as an aging man. Unless there is a mirror immediately in front of you, you forget your age when you see a beautiful young person. Forget the gray hair, wrinkles and sags and only see the youth in front of you and the recollection of yourself at that age. Our culture worships youth and this is particularly evident with gay men, although I must admit that I am still open to finding a partner my age, with a common history to share during our diminishing future. Sean Connery, in my opinion, is still one of the most beautiful men on the planet and I could see getting it on with him if he were so inclined. But, I also get quite turned on by the sight and feel of a well-sculpted young body. Being so attracted to young men, I know in reality they would not necessarily be attracted to me. Rather than make a public fool of myself by chasing after young men, or risk arrest by offering to rent young men who seem open to that, I am relegated to lone-sex fantasies of how it used to be. However, I am always open to windfalls that come my way and at two times have I recently had the pleasure of meeting young men who are into older men. Shale & Carlos 2004 Haulover Park Beach 2004 Carlos was such a delight to find. Actually, he came on to me at the nude beach. He likes older guys and I was number three and the oldest of his love interests. Although he was 30, his small stature gave the impression of being much younger. His body was still youthfully taut and his smooth skin was such a pleasure to touch. His physicality drove me wild, and the fact that he sincerely loved my attentions added to the feeling of sensuality. There is another young man, Raul, in his mid twenties whom I have known for years. He is bi, married to a woman closer to my age than to his. Raul is very sexually uninhibited, and makes passionate love to his wife, but often when I visit, he gets equally passionate with me. Shale & Raul 2003 While embracing and deep kissing this young man, a decade younger than my daughter, I forget the age gap. I forget the wrinkles in my own skin while licking the smooth tautness of his. I don't see my gray beard or balding head, just the black stubble on his face and the thick hair that I run my fingers thru as we kiss. In quieter moments Raul has shown me some of the intimate fotos of other gray haired bears he's cavorted with (as well as some young muscular guys). I know Raul's history, that he has been sexually active since a very early age, before the age of legal consent actually. He does not consider it to have harmed him. I asked Raul why he likes us older guys and he said it's because we are more caring, and sensitive. We take an interest in his feelings more than a lot of the younger men. I think he must know that we are actually more appreciative of the opportunity to connect with a young man, to experience again thru sight and touch, those moments of our own youth that we see slipping away.
Hey, As long as it's consensual and the other is not a minor, whatever floats your boat. I do think that the more experienced person has a responsibility to allow the young person to develop freely and not take advantage of naivety, which it sounds like you do. When I think youth, I think energy, curiousity, vitality, and simple pleasures. When I think older, I think experience, stability, security, and wisdom. The two can be very complimentary. Cheers
The age of the men that are attracted to you is in no way upsetting. I find it to be beautiful in its own right. It reminds me of the ancient Greeks. An old man would be partnered with a young man, the young man would enjoy the wisdom of his elder and the old man would be made to feel young again. They would make love in a way that was special in a way different from male-female relations. I think older guys are sexy. Anthony Hopkins in Silence of the Lambs, for instance. Although I have never been with one I do not think it is wrong as long as the sex is between two consenting adults who understand what they are doing. Honestly I am surprised that people on this forum, who claim to be open minded about life and sex would be so judgmental about this sort of thing. I can't imagine being offended by something so trivial or common. It was almost as if you had admitted to raping your sister of screwing a dog.
Yea' that thread got pretty sad. I was wanting to say something but it's hard to find words that will convey a message without starting a flame war of some sorts and I'm so sick of derisiveness on the interwebz (in society for that matter) these days... He must have some serious hangups about father figures judging by the way he kept making the comparison to "how would you feel if your son yada, yada" like all he could do was envision how his father would react to him coming out of the closet and no less coming out with a partner 3 times his age. Was i the only one who sensed that there? I mean I'm nearly 40 and have yet to have a relationship with a woman past 30 (Well there was one but I had been working too much overtime then and had no life,,, ) but of course I'm a straight male so I somehow doubt that the other poster would take issue there. Just seems like he was using the age difference as an excuse to air his feelings of discomfort with the notion of homosexuality perhaps? Keep on keepin' on Shale. :cheers2:
great post Shale i don't see why people think it's bad. if anything they would think the relationship wouldn't last because its different moments in life and different learning experiences but that is a personal thing with the people in the relationship. there is no place for anyone else to limit anyone else with this topic. this post makes me feel better about love and open-mindedness btw that carlos guy looks like a fine specimen
This is a really good post. I think a connection that extends past ages is a beautiful thing. Its good know that people in our society will embrace almost any type of relationship that brings love and happiness and will do so without fear and regret.
Love has no age or gender. If you are in a caring relationship with a person older or younger than you or the same sex it should not be an issue with other people.
I just dug up this old thread I started in Jan 2010 and fixed all the missing foto links that must have changed over the years. However, here is an update. While at the nude beach in November of 2012, I was approached by a younger man with a charming French Canadian accent who just told me he loved my white beard. While not extremely younger than me, he was merely 17 years my junior, he is into older, bearded men. Everyone has their turnons and mine are younger men who appreciate me. Anyhow, he travels a lot and lives in Italy, where this year he invited me to visit, paid my airfare and gave me the most enjoyable holiday in my life. Michel & Shale View of Lago Maggiore, Italy from his Villa July 12, 2015
I don't think there's anything wrong with it. I think once someone is 18 then their partner could be 65 and it's really their choice. Under 18, I'm not too sure, if laws state 16 is old enough for legal sex then maybe they're old enough at that stage too, not really my business anyway. I think it should only matter if one partner was greatly manipulating the other for an unhealthy advantage.
I wasn't 18 yet. I hope that is not a problem for you irminsul. I think this would not even be an issue if we weren't disproportionately concerned about sex. It is a function of the body. All body functions are no less than vital. You don't fuck with your mind. But if you mind someone fucking, well that's a mind fuck.
