Is it possible to have more than one true love in your life?

Thanks to all of you

 

I didn't ask this question lightly. I believe there can be more than one true love in one's life. I didn't feel this way at one time until it happened to me. Everyone who wrote made excellent points, some of which I hadn't thought of.

Awhile ago I also started a conversation asking, "What would you do?" which tied into this question I asked here of, "Can there be more than one true love in a lifetime?"

When I was 30 years old, I had been married for 7 years. Some friends called to let me know my high school boyfriend who I had been with for four years and almost married, now had brain cancer and didn't have very much longer to live. We had not spoken since we broke up, 9 years before.

We had been very close and loved each other very much, so I flew cross country to see him one last time. We had the opportunity to say all the things most people never get the chance to say to each other, and said our goodbyes. He asked to make love to me and we did three times during the week I stayed with him. I felt it would have been wrong not to.

My question is, what would you have done? (Please go to that conversation if you would like to reply to this question:

http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/showthread.php?t=388150&f=65

I also wrote a poem about this man that I put in the poetry section of Hip Forums if you would like to read it:

http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/showthread.php?t=392028&f=24


Sugarplumplum

 

Nice point u made there. We love some1 at that point in time and we see them as the perfect partner. But as we change, I think thats where we tend to seek other ppl who fulfill our constant growth within ourselves. But there are some ppl who are so comfortable with a person, that reject any form of change, even though its inevitable.

It doesnt mean that we stop loving the person, but we seek something that is missing once again. If we find a person who can constantly grow with you and develop themselves and yourselves in your own ways, through eachother, I wouldnt think we would need to go looking for some1 else.

But I too, have had profound feelings for another person, as if I would be given a chance, I would love them very much. But that doesnt linger in my mind constantly. It more of a hypothetical situation.

Love is free, should stay free.

 

My first true love was 4 years ago, and the beautiful feeling I had then, I never had again with anyone else. I dont think it'll be that powerful again but its rare to really experience it. I have connections with some people, but nothing like my true love

 

My heart goes out to you for you loss. My beloved wife of nearly 19 years passed away last year, after a life-long struggle with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis (and multiple sclerosis for most of her adult life, as well). I'm grateful that she's not in pain anymore, but I miss her horribly. We really were the perfect match for each other.

I'm now in the middle of wondering if I have found a second true love. Honestly, it seems too good to be true, like I'm deluding myself. I'm dating and old, old friend, that I've known since childhood, although our paths had separated for about 25 years, until just before my wife died. Our parents were friends when we were kids. She lives far enough away that we can only spend weekends together, and we originally just planned on spending a few weekends together just for the fun of it, but when it would have been time to move on instead of stringing her along, I didn't want to.

You can't compare "Year 1" with "Year 19." It wouldn't even be fair to try, but to tell the truth, if I compare "Year 1" with "Year 1," we're doing great. I have my doubts and worries that I'm just deluding myself, but they're starting to fade away.

There are over six billion people on Earth. If we only have just one soulmate, odds are that we'll never find them. In fact, odds are 1 in 4 that they're in China. But I was so unlucky-in-love before I found my wife, it's hard to believe that I've struck gold twice in a row.

 

Hmm i'll have to word this carefully.

My view:
The socially accepted definition of soul mate has taken the meaning of one perfect life partner for all of eternity and that they belong to each other & no one else.

I believe that definition to be false because:

1. People don't necessarily belong TO each other. They belong WITH each other as equals, at a specific time and place in a specific way, in a mutual consenting relationship.

2. An aspect of true love is complete devotion but not dependency upon your partner and that can't happen if you're "cheating". That doesn't mean you don't have urges or crushes on others while in true love...but that's all it will remain...a crush because you'll value what you have more.

3. Finding true love is certainly possible after death or after a divorce. Because people don't BELONG to each other. (see #1)

 

Yes
because if you only loved 1 person your entire life
it would be obsession
its good to simply not attach to ANYONE too much
Because we dont really need love from others
Because we already are love

 

I think so

 

Yes, and yes.

This is why I'm a strong supporter of polygamy.

There are instances when one individual can be attracted to two people, each who are rather different but offer the same value to that individual's life.

 

Yes. It happened many time with me.

 

The only couple of problems with how i've seen polygamy practiced is that mostly it's males who have multiple partners. (There's an unfair double standard to females who probably feel attraction to multiples that males do)

And the diseases and lack of people willing to share sexual histories and get a full body workup. (diseases can end your fun nowadays literally, we also need to be able to procreate and if everyone's catches something that makes them sterile we got a problem and the generations after us won't have fun ).

 

If you personify love, then I believe in fidelity and will say stick with one. If you don't personify love, then I will say that love itself is always true, it can never be false !

Love Quotes

 

Well this is a hard question acutally...
No, I don't believe that we can love someone so utterly, so completely, more than once. I was actually having this conversation with someone last night....
I believe that we have one true love, one 'soulmate', and that they are our true other half, put on this earth simply to love us. And if something happens to the person.... I believe we could love again, but not as pure and true and real as the soulmate, you can't ever find love as amazing as the first time.

 

99% of people won't find their soul mate. we must all have one, but there's just too many people in the world.

 

A depressing thought.... but true. Maybe I'm one of the other 1%? Quite possibly