The (New) Thread of LIES!!!

I named all the towns on mars.

 

I'm dressing up as a fertility goddess for the rest of the year.

 

My eyes are sore, so I'm soaking them in the sink at the moment.

 

This sentence is false.

 

I love shoveling snow....

 

Me too these 3 feet of snow are kind of growing on me

 

I'm really enjoying all the snow we've been gettin'.....

 

you ruined my life!!!!!1

 

The Earth's new sig is not good at all.

 

I just bought this today.

 

Amarillo this way

 

I like to stay drunk all day, slip into a comatose state overnight, then I am rested and ready to start drinkin again....;-)

 

Flamingos dug a tunnel under my house.

 

I have free internet...

 

I'm about to pull the rip cord.

 

i eat hamburgers for breakfast

 

Hey..where ya been?...I missed you tons.

 

I have never learned to drive a car....

 

Life is not just about having fun you know.

 

I smoke 10+ packs per day.