Roll the Dice: What's YOUR Vice?

We all have them, that's a given. But recently I've been in a weird position in terms of vices. As I ranted about before, I went though a pretty gnarly break up 2 months ago that definitely weighed me down emotionally. What kept running through my mind was "goddamnit, I wish I had an awesome vice still to release some of this emotion". I would sit in my apartment and just feel so overwhelmed and almost fantasize about how easily I use to be able to just drink/smoke/drug myself retarded/ shove my fingers down my throat without a second thought, but now some part ofmy brain goes "Uhh Uhh uhhh! You don't want to do that, silly!" and I'm left with raw emotions. I have been exercising but it's not the same.

And last night i was out with a new guy and he asked me what my current vices were and I couldn't pinpoint one. I use to smoke weed upwards of 10 times a day, now I'm a once a month kind of lady so that didnt do. I just had a drinking bender, but I haven't drank all week and have no real pull towards the bottle so that doesn't work either. The real answer is probably food? I'm always overeating or undereating, never gone more than a few months on a "healthy" eating plan. I'm currently in the undereating place, consuming less than 800 calories a day on top of 500+ calorie burning work outs, so I'm torturing my body in that respect.

I don't know about you guys, but I feel like I NEED that vice, something to "balance" everything out, something bad keep me in check, because I get suspicious and uneasy when things are "good" for too long. Even writing that sounds a bit bonkers, but does anyone else feel that way?

So, what are your vices? Do you feel like a tragic flaw is a necessary part of a complete person?

 

Weed, Food, Beer & Wine, Movies, TV Shows and Computer Games. All vices for me.

I used to love really getting into a computer game to take my mind off of things.

 

I sleep alot when I'm depressed. I like to just completely let go of my problems and sleep it off for awhile.
If that doesn't work I'll go for marijuana or booze.

 

Ciggies are a vice, and I hate it. particularly with coffee in the morning, closest you're going to get to a 'buzz' before lectures.

I have a pretty addictive personality, so I am a little bit awful with beer. So I try hard not to drink, not because I drink loads, but because it's pretty depressing.

 

stella have you thought about maybe seeing a therapist? i have struggled with eating and exercise disorders and still do at times, therapy has helped me in so many ways.

as far as my vices, i don't know if i'd call em that but.. thankfully not really engaging in any at the moment...i've been trying to get more in touch with my feelings and all that. but within the last year, during my lowest of lows, i was binging on food, smoking way too often, drinking way too much on a couple of occasions, and having reckless sex.

sex has always been my biggest vice and i act out because i don't always deal with my emotions. there is a silly side to it when i'm on SL talking about sex all the time but the other side is coming from unhealthy issues.

 

How could I forget sex!! It's definitely one of my biggest vices... especially after I break up or something emotional like that happens.. I get pretty wreckless, too

 

grrr.. my eating has so gotten out of control.. im back up in the 220+ range.. and i am not happy.. it seems i cannot do anything about it.. i try to refrain and then the next thing i know.. im eating.. and then i just give up.. i dunno wtf is wrong

 

Friends, weed, beer, drawing and funny internet articles are bout all I have at the moment for vices. I would say working out but do that as more of a habit than a method to feel more settled.

 

You can always throw up right after you eat all that food!


Nahh.. I'm jk. I dunno what to tell ya, though

 

internet, women, whiskey, weed, bouldering

 

that's fucked up
:leaving:

 

Are you talking about my post?

 

My vices are food, drugs and sex.
each for a different cause.
Because of my childhood, I know I could benefit from talking to a therapist, but I doubt I ever will.
Im a hold-it-in kinda person.
that part bolded is true with me too.

 

<33 hug for you
it sounds like you might have an open mind to it.. i know it's not an easy decision..but you deserve to heal and be happy and healthy

 

To be honest, I think the part that I need healing in the most, is my issues with my mother.
the sexual abuse is small potatoes. It really doesnt bother me as much as it should. thats the fucked up part.

 

those are difficult issues to carry *hug*

i don't know where i'd be right now if i wasn't meeting with my therapist , i don't feel alone or buried anymore

 

Yeah, thanks.
It has been alot to deal with. It still is every day. I smoke to try to forget, and it works most of the time, but there are times that it still gets to me. It holds me back from alot, but at the same time im glad it holds me back from what it does. Im also kinda okay with it all, since these experiences made me who I am today, and for the most part, I like how I turned out.