Dealing With Prudes

Yeah, to me it sounds like you're using it as an arena to validate yourself via opposition.

Why would you talk about your sex life at all with others if it didn't provide you with some secondary benefit?

That being said, prudes can suck my cock.

Edit: Unfortunately, they won't.

 

I'm also a little suspicious of people who advertise their sexual liberation...Why are those people never around when I need to fuck?

Maybe, I make it a self-fulfilling prophecy if I assume they are only cockteasing, like I invariably do. I need a major attitude overhaul.

 

:rofl: Maybe they are around, and you just don't always know who they are. It takes less courage to reveal things online.

Yeah, I wouldn't be making that assumption, if I were you. Sometimes girls throw out tidbits about what we want and what we're willing to do, waiting to see what the guy's reaction is going to be. Before we reveal more, we want strong hints that the reaction is going to be positive. We want to know who we are talking to. I've had more than one guy turn defensive and judgemental when I crossed a certain line in a flirty conversation, and that isn't a pleasant place to be.

 

Throw a dildo at their head. :biggrin:

Either that, or you can ignore them or talk it out a little in a way where the two of you can come to an agreement. If no agreement, keep a dildo handy.

 

ive been called a man whore, but fuck that. judging uneducatedly is unexeptable

 

Sex IS sacred, even if you are poly and share it with multiple people at once.

 

I still say you guys either don't exist, or are ugly, or prostitutes. Mainly.

You're like, speaking in parables...EXAMPLES?

Until then, it sounds like utter bullshit. Whenever women go, "Oh, hints, this that to see a guy's reaction" I grow veeery suspicious of their so-called liberation.

Here's the hint I want from these sexually liberated women: Invite me home if you find me attractive. If I don't find you attractive, I will politely decline. If I do, we have hot, steamy sex.

But seriously, if hints is your thing, you're by definition not liberated at all. You're playing ancient mysogynist gender roles.

Sexual liberation has been coopted: FACT.

Edit: You're also speaking of ONE situation with a guy, do you know how many horrendous situations men are forced into due to their social roles as initiators routinely? Sorry, I fail to empathize.

Every time a girl gives hints in order to take no risks at all, there will be another situation in which a woman will get unwanted aggressive attention. It's mathematical. The love you withdraw, is the pain that you bring.

Be braver!

 

I don't know where you live, so I don't know what the demographics are like. But I can assure you that there are hot, sexually liberated women EVERYWHERE, at least in small numbers. I know some Bible Belt women who attend church regularly and their church friends have no clue that they are sluts at heart. What's the percentage of the total number? I don't know.

Prostitutes? Ha! Most women are, in one way or another. There are a dozen forms of sex for money. Most of them are legal. Our willingness to give away what we can sell varies greatly, depending on our finances and other details.

You can't imagine a woman not wanting to be a verbal punching bag for prudes? Seriously? Even online, it's unpleasant.

I never said that I drop hints. I said that I disclose information in pieces, based on feedback. It isn't the same thing. I ask a lot of questions. A lot of times the guy is slow to open up, because of past bad experiences talking to conservative women. Once a guy makes it clear to me that he isn't narrow-minded, I'll tell him exactly how I feel about sex and relationships. I think that's being smart, not deceptive. That's the way I look at it. If a friend tells me that a guy is cool, I'll be straight-up with him from the first word.

I don't want empathy on this. I just think it is useful to talk about these things. I wouldn't want to be a guy. (For a variety of reasons.)

Not only do I not know your demographic/social situation, but I have no idea how you come across to women. Unfortunately, a lot of younger women do a lot of stereotyping and make a lot of assumptions based on superficial things or even false clues. I don't know how to make this better. Just know that it improves over time. The odds are stacked against younger men, in so many different ways.

Young guys getting with cougars has become a major social trend in some areas. For the guys, I think a lot of the attraction of this deal has to do with the lack of head games. Older women don't care so much about what their friends think or what a magazine said last month. We will tell you the way it is, and we will follow through.

 

I think with prudes you just have to be up front and break them.. prudes are just people afraid of the taboo pleasures that go beyond missionary

 

Gah. You're evading the issue with pseudo-social analysis, k?

If you want to know, I am in my thirties, in very good shape, in good socio-economic standing, and I am considered attractive by many women. I've also been with many women. I've lived in New York for 15 years, live in Brazil now, etc.

That doesn't change the fact that I have NEVER met a truly sexually liberated woman in my life. And I've met hordes of them.

Also, if you want to get information in pieces from me, I'm going to walk away. My patience is 0, for this kind of shit.

Edit: I should mention that many women have been straightforward about wanting to have sex with me on the spot, but they have been INVARIABLY unattractive. It's almost magical, the consistency of it.

Edit: Ok, I've thought of a couple of attractive women whom I've met who were in fact attractive and sexually liberated with me. Ok, but it's still so rare as to make life almost unbearable.

 

Goodbye.

 

To carry on the idea that people aren't very good at seeing how non-monogamous people can even exist and live contently while they are struggling to maintain a single romantic relationship, I just recently posted on Yelp Talk in San Francisco about a topic that I also asked here on HipForums in Free Love (http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/showthread.php?t=387688&f=283)
I was a teensy bit surprised at how many people in the Bay Area suggested or told me straightforwardly that I dump my bf (of five years!) before starting to look for other guys to have sex with. It really made me think about the standards which people throughout the country maintain and attempt to push upon others they barely know. People have come to expect that poly relations never work and they can't seem to be made to think otherwise just because they wouldn't ever try it (because they believe it won't work out).
Hrumph to closed minds.
Booooo to people who can't see that their way isn't the best way for all.

 

A writer (a commenter) in the NYT today made two very good pints, I thought. Point I - conservatives (substitute 'prudes') are afraid of anything not themselves. Not 'hate,' but 'afraid.' They turn away in fear. Point II- They fear sex and don't want to think about sex differently from what they like to do. By lawyering up against things they fear and making them illegal (same gender marriage, for instance) they save themselves the task of having to think about it. They just can't face the fact of gay sexual expression. Or peace! Or a black President. Or you and me!! I hope my review makes sense, I thought it a good way of thinking about the poor bastards! "Scardy Cat, eat a Rat, puke your guts into a hat!," we used to sing. Maybe we still should!

 

That's a very good point. People do tend to fear what they don't understand.

Some people understand very little.

 

Nuff said. Ciao.

 

yeah dude, ppl telling me i cant pee on em and saying thats sick shit. Well fuck that shit ill go pee on your little sister. ppl be rude, prude, and have a bad attitude. If i was R Kelly it would be watersports all day everyday, stupid whore.

 

hypocrisy at its finest.....


you dont wanna be labelled a whore but you'll label others as a prude, lulz....

 

?

 

it was a valid question Karen, do you not see the hypocrisy in you complaining about these supposed 'prudes' who look down at you for being promiscuous?

its not personal, but you always seem to take every little thing personally just because we dont get along.....anyone could've made this thread and i wouldve said the same thing....then -instead of trying to explain your position you neg rep me and say" leave me alone"?!

lol, wtf?


I am genuinely interested in why you think this isnt hypocritical.