Rough, first draft cause I haven't got the energy to go over it. This just came out like vomit and it is what it is. Why did you ever choose me If I'm not the girl you want? Why disrupt my life When you didn't intend to stay? What was I to you Besides a strand in a rope? I'm ever so sorry For being in your way. Where was the room for love In the midst of that makeover? You claimed to have it So I took you at your word. I told myself I felt it; I couldn't even glimpse it. There were so many before me. I was just another in your herd. You clung to me so quickly And I backed away in fear. I wanted to know myself. I fell deep when I was sure. That's when you let go of me. Were you afraid of feeling something? You made me worthless When not silently demure. Did I grip your hand too tightly, So hard it crushed your spirit? Did it become annoying To cradle me at night? Did my arms too snugly hold you? Are they what forced out all your love? They drained you clean and bland Until every word was fight. You sure liked my legs around you, All your frost wrapped in my warmth. Rising each night without fail You rolled me when I was dead; 'I'm asleep' was no excuse, I was yours anytime you chose. But stand upon those legs And you ran far, far from our bed.
Raw, pained sentiments here, and a fantastic draft it is, even if rough. The edges only emphasize the emotions that fuel them, and they seem quite powerful to me. Very familiar territory, and I'm sure many others will identify with this as well. Thanks for sharing this, it was a wonderful read i just love the ending; and find myself wanting more... I think that's a great thing to accomplish
Aww fulmah, once again you're too nice. I don't know if I already asked you this, but will you marry me?
I'm with Fulmah, the last stanza is the best. Beautiful, even though it was quite painful to write, I'm sure. Bless your heart.
