I'm gonna be late for work because....

I don't give a fuck

 

bcos i shot my boss so i know i wont be missed just yet...

 

painted myself in a corner...

 

I am gonna be late 'cause I'm dead

 

my carer is on strike.

 

wanking is taking longer than expected

 

Monday don't exist in my week.

 

I diddnt change my clock back an hour yet

 

I ran into Elvis and he wanted to use my toilet.

 

I got a bad case of the runs

 

I had to help BBAD he was in a bad way

 

oops

 

oops again.

 

i am going to be late for work becuase i was commited to a psyc ward beuase of my break down i will be out in a month hopefully

i am going to be late for work because jigsaw had a game for me to play i lost

i am going to be late for work beuase my partner forgot to untie me from the st andrews cross this morning after me being naughty
i am going to be late for work becuase i was in a nuc fall out zone , i willl be there asoon as i find my car

i will be late for work because for some odd reason i tend to get lost just going to the mail box , it takes me a month to find that . my work is only 2 blocks up the road and it has taken me 40 years and 40 days and nights to get there just find out the place was domolished by an astrodied
i was late for work becuase i was stoned

 

I had to help Mel Gibson home, he got drunk at a bar mitzvah.

 

i couldnt stop staring at this

 

me too, its so interesting.

 

there were a bunch of llamas in the road

 

my lobster just wouldn't come to the boil.