decreasing the likelihood of rejection

hi! i've been hanging out with this girl for a little over a month, and she's reminding me how i've never had a relationship with someone who was truly a decent, kind person. i've really only dated girls who were generally not the greatest partner - not reliable, unfaithful, or just simply uninteresting.

but this girl is really special - i think she's my ideal woman. very intelligent, cute, has similar interests... i have such a great time when i'm around her. she is definitely interested in me (as in thinks i'm interesting, not necessarily in a romantic sense).

but ... i don't get to see her very often - she doesn't live too close by.

basically i'm trying to figure out how to not fuck this up before it can really go somewhere. i've never had an opportunity like this.

'`'`'`'`'`

here are some things i've learned that i'm trying to implement:

don't exhaust the relationship: don't invade her space or force the issue so much that you tire each other out. leave her wanting to learn more about you and spend more time with you. avoid random chatting - online, text...

don't be to desiring: don't come across as too eager or needy. but this one is tricky because you want to get romantic at some point.

cultivate future activites: there's a number of things i can do with this girl, so i'm ok here.

figure out what it is about yourself that interests her: i've already done this, i think.

'`'`'`'`

also, i'm kind of wondering if i messed up the other day - i was slightly drunk and we got on the topic of sex. i talked a little about how i've been learning about taoist sexual alchemy and i might have bragged a little about myself... i'm almost 22, not a virgin, and i know some things the average guy probably doesn't - but i definitely have had a small number of partners and don't want to come off as otherwise.

so i'd love to have a serious relationship with her - i really need to do everything right, especially because i'm unable to see her very often. >_<

can anyone please offer some advice?

 

I would say that all those points are really good pieces of advice.

The fact that you guys had some drinks and got on the subject of sex makes it seem like you two are really comfortable around eachother. Another point of advice- don't fret over the small stuff, like wondering if you screwed up by having that conversation with her last night. Don't second guess yourself either, she's taking the time to hang out with you so she probly likes you.

Do you guys seem to be getting closer and more comfortable with each other as time goes on?

Maybe you should just give it a little more time and then kiss her or something.

 

hey thanks for your input

yes, we're pretty comfortable with each other - she often tries to learn more things about me that i don't normally talk to people about.

but i have a feeling the physical closeness will take longer...

i'll see how things progress and i'll probably report back here at some point.