Personally, I don't plan on getting married anytime soon. Especially after the part at the end about Paternity Fraud being legal. Why the hell should I be forced to raise somebody else's kid? from: http://sxmodels.blogspot.com/2009/11/why-men-increasingly-avoid-marriage.html Across the internet, women have begun making statements such as: Why are men avoiding marriage? Why do guys avoid commitment? Being single sucks. A Carl Weisman study showed American men are increasingly avoiding marriage. Men fear getting involved in bad marriages with bad wives. This fear is partly driven by the feminist based anti-husband messages of women's magazines and writers. For example, Parenting Magazine claims their marriage survey shows moms are angry at their husbands "at surprising levels". They state husbands "often don't notice what needs to be done around the house or with the kids". They also claim husbands have "more time to themselves" as compared with moms. Their survey stated 46% of moms get irate with their husbands once a week or more. Lisa Bain, executive editor of Parenting Magazine said "The truth is if you prick any one of us with a little pin, anger comes out". Female writers of ABC News and the Associated Press discussed the survey and expressed outrage at husbands. However, the magazine's survey completely ignored husbands. No husband was asked anything. His opinions were considered unimportant. His efforts at work were ignored and he was largely unappreciated by his wife...... Another women's magazine, called Double X, promotes books where wives cheat on their husbands. The book 'Prospect Park West' was promoted with the headline "Mommies Want to Have Sex, Just Not With Their Husbands". The book 'The Seven Year Itch' was promoted with the question "is it still realistic to expect wives to remain faithful to their husbands?" Conversely Double X continuously criticizes cheating husbands. The feminist notion its acceptable for a wife to cheat but wrong for her husband to be unfaithful has also been promoted by the online women's magazine Ivillage (though not all its writers agree with this mentality), female writers of the online magazine Askmen and, incredibly, Men's Health Magazine. Additionally, female reporters of ABCNews & Good Morning America continuously criticize cheating husbands. They refuse to criticize cheating wives. Single men think: Why get married if its ok for my wife to cheat but I have to remain faithful? Why should I give up dating different women to be married to a cheating wife? Why should I accept abuse?........ Lastly, American divorce laws also cause men to fear marriage. The feminist judicial system often rules against husbands in divorce. Husband's are usually ordered to pay large alimony / child support payments to the ex-wife. Some claim the child support payments contain hidden alimony. In most states, these payments don't decrease if the ex-wife's income dramatically increases after the divorce. Though some wives with high paying jobs have been ordered to pay alimony/child support to their ex-husbands, many judges are reluctant to apply divorce laws equally. Additionally, if the husband later loses his job & fails to continue child support payments, he will be jailed......And paternity fraud remains legal. The divorce system is designed to trap men in bad marriages with bad wives. An increasing number of American men are now reaching the conclusion that being a husband is not worth it. The better deal is to remain single and have a series of relationships with different women while pursuing hobbies and life goals. Additionally, a college educated single man can have a very good life. What if everything were reversed. What if only a husband's perspective was important in marriage and cheating was only wrong for the wife. What if the family court system discriminated against wives? Would American women want to become wives to the massive degree they do today? Doubtful.
I'm not sure what you mean by "paternity fraud". Are you refering to the fact that many states (including California) regard the husband (at time of conception) of the child's mother to be the father, no matter what the DNA says? If so, the law was designed so that the bio-dad can't interfere with the relationship between a married man and the kid that calls him "Daddy". Dude, choose your wife wisely. BTW, a non-married father gets the same kind of child support payments to deal with, so wrap it up or zip it up.
I don't believe the "wife never gets shit on for cheating" part. I think women are more pressured in marriage to be faithful then men. Also I will agree on the Men getting fucked with child support and women run off with the cheddar. I think their is where i don't believe that women want equal rights. Also you can't make a hoe in to a housewife, so men need to be more careful on who we get married with.........
Thats still fucked up though, heres this single woman with kids and then you come into her life help her out with her kids for a decent 3-5 years then decide that its not worth it so then you divorce her and have to pay for child support? when you not the bio-dad? why doesn't the judge take in to count that the step-father came in to the relationship not having kids and knowing that the mother still knows the bio-dad?
marriage is pointless. that statement seems very blunt but seriously is their any logical reason for anyone (male or female) to get married in these times? now that both counterparts of the human species have the same rights and can equally better their selves within society, whats the point? maybe if marriage seemed like an attractive investment to a logical being, then yes i could see the point. but what could possibly be attractive about anything that the OP has posted. it seems as if marriage has turned into a tool for the weak minded.
I think marriage is alright for different people. It should always be an option, but many people want their love to be known to the highest degree.
That's not what I said. As far as I know, if the time line is a)Kids are born from other father b)Marriage c)Divorce then there is no child support owed (absent an adoption) However if the sequence is 1)Marriage 2)Wife cheats on husband, gets pregnant, has kid The co-respondant (kid's bio-dad) has no parental rights to the child. He cannot (succesfuly) sue for visitation or anything. As I said, the purpose of this is to (try to) insure that the kid has a present daddy and to prevent this interloper from interfering in the rocky (hopefuly getting stronger) marriage and the developing relationship between the kid and the man who is raising it. 3)Divorce then the ex-husband pays child support.
And that is a big reason why a lot of guys including myself see marriage as garbage. Your "interloper" IS the real father and SHOULD BE responsible for his kid. He ALREADY interfered with the marriage. The husband should not have to pay child support. I see that as a penalty to a husband who simply wants to dump his backstabbing wife and just get on with his life. Unless she is a total whore, the wife knows which man is the father - and that is the man who should support the child.
No the interloper is not the real father, the REAL father is the man who raises the kid. The real father is the one who sits up with the sick kid. All the interloper did was supply sperm. He made no commitment to the mother. Of course if forcing the interloper to "do the right thing" is the goal, then using the kid as a goad is justifiable. If the goal is to raise a healthy kid, then the genetic relationship with the man doing the real fathering doesn't matter. Doing the real fathering is more important to the kid than where the genes came from. Fathering is done better when the father and the mother are living together. Hence the incentive to keep the married couple together and get the sperm donor out of the way so that real parenting can begin.
No the goal is to raise YOUR kid or else you'd fucking adopt! What if you had an affair and had a kid with another woman, then brought that kid into your family with your wife? How would your wife feel? She'd go ballistic. Why would it be acceptable to raise HER mistake? She could fuck any dude on the street and you'd be forced into paying for and raising his kid. How would the kid feel later on, knowing he's a bastard and his mother was a whore? Its better to force the interloper to own up to HIS responsibility.
