Married people! Do you get discriminated against?

Also-
It must be nice to be able to say

my husband.

My person who loves me.

My views have all been distorted Team Rocket Amanda.

 

Did you google 'pose as team rocket'??

I bet you did......

 

Haha Nu!! There is this awesome website with awesome tshirts and this is one of them, my bro bought it

CAUSe SHIT JUST GOT REEEEEAL

 

Yuh

 

I got that baby crap for the first few years of marriage from the mother-in-law. Took her a while to get over and now she thinks we're being smart.

Once a complete stranger told me I was selfish to not want a kid...

There's a thread, I think in the conspiracy forum, about how humans will become extinct or men will become obsolete because more and more people are not having kids. I don't know where people come up with this crap.

 

I love the idea of marriage. not in any religious way or anything, because some form of marriage occurs in probably all religions, its more of a universal idea.

I wish people took it a little more seriously, and don't go into it thinking that "oh if it doesn't work, we'll just get a divorce lol!"

I think it is dumb that people are trying to "protect the sanctity of marriage" from gays as if it belongs to them. like I said, I believe it is more of a human institution rather than a religious one. Limiting marriage to one particular population is only going to create chaos. How about working towards healthier marriages rather than trying to keep other people out of it while you work on getting your wife to sign your divorce papers?

I want someone to be committed to me as much as I am to them

>about how humans will become extinct or men will become obsolete because more and more people are not having kids.

haha.. I think people that have them on accident, or the mormons, are making up for the ones opting out

 

I agree Pandy! So many people give up after their first big fight. We've been married for two years now together nearly four. We used to argue like crazy before we married but now we are married we don't fight at all, whatever problems we have we talk it over like adults, that's how marriage made me a better more patient person. I would say that we rushed into an engagement [6 weeks after we met]. I do think that we could have waited because it could have ended horribly. But, saying that I don't regret a single day of it.

I think it's lovely that your parents have been married for so long and shrugged off all the interracial crap that I bet they got.

 

That pisses me off to no end. I hate people who do that.

Also with the extinction of the human race, I think the world is too over populated. My husband and I do not want our children to face famine which has been estimated to happen in just twenty years. We have so much we want to do that by the time kids arrive we'll be in our forties and we'd rather adopt than go down the IVF route and add to the over population. I don't want to offend anyone who has had IVF this is just my opinion

 

I've been with the same woman for 20+ years, but we were not legally married for some time and that was what we caught shit for. My grandmother wouldn't acknowlege her great grand kids for years since they were born out of wedlock.

We always figured we didn't need a peice of paper to prove our love, so getting legally married was more of a practical decision for us having to do with insurance, property ownership, and being able to legally make medical decisions for each other. Not terribly romantic I know, but we had already committed ourselves to each other in a ceremony and we already had five kids together.

 

I think a big thing is people's want to preserve their legacy, they think every one should, or else what would be your point here? I think that is more selfish than not having kids.

I do see the benefits of having your own kid.. that you can see traits of yourself and your partner in that kid, knowing that your penis made that thing, and that is the only reason some people need.

Adoption is great. why not be able to apply your kid raising skills to someone very desperately needs it or else they will die? It perpetuates cultural diversity and acceptance especially among the kids peers. I'd say that is very valuable.

As for overpopulation, I don't know.. I feel that things will even out, like it usually does.. going down the path the west has set itself on which is highly processed foods, obesity, instant gratification, laziness, and obscene drug use (over the counter and recreational alike). not to mention war, natural disaster, and famine.

 

I have so much admiration for couples who haven't thrown in the towel after an argument. Getting married for the reasons that you did don't really matter the fact that you have ben committed for so long speaks volumes.

 

I am certainly the black sheep of my immediate family and I have not followed "the way it should be" as quoted by my sis that I love a lot.

I have never married and I truly don't know if I ever will. If I do, it is not for any romantic notions. I have never envisioned my wedding (even as a young girl) and still cannot imagine spending money on a wedding because I am pretty damn practical. Also, the only attraction for me about getting married at this point would be to share the name of bf and my children. I call him hubby on the forum all of the time because it's easier. I have used "partner" in Canada before and everyone seems to assume I'm gay so I often just call him my husband.

Up until I met my partner (age 24) I was never going to have kids and neither was he. Then when we met, we both felt we finally met a person who we wanted to have children with. (unrelated to marriage, but relevant to the discussion I think). We then became pregnant rather quickly after our decision to "not hold back" on kids.

My parents are still together so that isn't the reason why I don't care for marriage.

To be honest... this is kind of weird, but I have come to see marriage as almost a selfish endeavour after having to spend $8000 combined on my two sister's weddings. That is not a fake number, that is what my family had to pay including flights, accommodation, etc, etc, etc.

However, I don't give a rat's ass what anyone else wants to do with their lives. Your life, your choices.

To answer HDH's question about why ppl would assume she must have kids... I would look at it in this light... A lot of ppl that get married young tend to settle and have children young. Ppl cant' think outside of what they know or havent seen in the past.

Um... now what was the question again?

 

Daisy, do you feel any pressure from your family etc to get married?

 

"Wedlock".. Now that is a word that puts me off!!

Thats exactly how I feel about it alaska. I forgot about that medical thing. Can't do much otherwise I hate all that insurance, property shit and finance stuff. Eurgh. But I guess it is part of todays world

I guess I gotta keep thinking of it like my happy place xD Mmm Beach.

 

Yes and no. My mother was not happy for me when she found out I was pregnant. They assumed I would marry before having children (I seriously have no idea why... blanket over their eyes). She changed her tune within a few days, but it wasn't hte baby Id on't think.. (well maybe) but more that I wasn't married yet.

I feel less pressure now because I guess everyone is just used to it. But my one sis and my mom are constantly offering to do the wedding for me. THey will plan everything and all I have to do is show up. I know my mom wishes we were. Chris's parents do not care and neither does my father.

My family does accept and treat Chris like he is my husband though. He is just as much family as their other two son-in-laws.

 

I think that spending a lot of money on a wedding is silly. I think ours came to about a grand. I only say it is silly because from what I've seen people have expensive weddings to feel like a princess and have the day about them, overshadowing their husband. I think your wedding day should be about a couple celebrating their love together rather than have the day be about the bride. I hate how some idiotic women look down on people who didn't have a lavish wedding.

 

Oh, adn my parents have been married for 32 years and Chris's parents have been for about 35.

 

I was responding to dragonvines last post.

I don't like the word wedlock either. It just sounds restrictive.

But yeah, all that financial, property and medical stuff is part of the world. The decision to do the legal thing has simplified quite a few things and has been worth some real financial savings when it came to medical bills.

 

Perhaps marriage can also be reflected by the laws of a country. C nad I have been claiming "common law" with the government for five years now. He has claimed me on his benefits and I have done the same for him. We own a house, etc and it's all the same as if we were "married" status.

 

Common law varies by state here. Alaska has no common law provisions and you know private insurance companies asociated with my employer here in the US aren't going to cover anyone they don't have to.