So...I used to be a prostitute and now

You're over simplfying things, of course there are nasty aspects to the role, of course there are girls that have bad experiences, but there is always the other end of the spectrum

But if it wasnt for the worlds oldest profession how many more rapes, how much more domestic violence, how many more guys with issues, how many more girls destined for generational poverty would there be in society? Working girls role is just as important as Firefighters, Paramedics, Police etc.

Nothing in life is ever simple.


I'll reiterate again, the problems ruby is facing is more about starting too early, than her chosen profession, when it comes to her chosen profession a lot of the trouble comes from being swamped by a sea of people telling her whats best for her when they have no idea, you and me included

 

I think she has heard enough of our opinions for now. It's her bad luck that this has been a slow week on the forums.

 

Well said Imagine11! There are some people that "get it". - Dale

 

You just haven't met the right guy yet, nothing more to it. Not being emotionally attached to every guy you have sex with sounds like a good thing to me, however hurt you've been by those two guys, you've surely avoided many other potential heartbreaks.

 

:cheers2: yayyy

 

haha, word.

 

thanks.
Well...I've like...half way been with a woman. hah. I'm not opposed, but I get along better with dudes generally speaking

 

One thing I think you're forgetting (as I'm assuming you must be male) is that when woman fuck...we're letting someone INSIDE of us. For men...you just put your shit out there.

There are emotional consequences for that.

Also, culture is getting more and more violent in regards to women. (Simulated rape games manufactured in Japan? Shock value as the main selling point in porn, as to who is the most violent and degrading towards women?)

Not enough men respect women the right way for it to be a safe career. Trust me.

Plus...it's just another fucking industry that relies mostly on poor young women who don't think they have any other options and sometimes really don't.

You let a man who disgusts you penetrate you somewhere and see if the money you get makes it feel better. Then see how long that feeling lasts.

but whatever.

 

Thing is, we also don't know the extent to which you did it. I mean, was it independent? Was it honestly through choice or through pressure? Were you in a safe environment such as an agency which was owed and run by those that took your bookings? I don't mean you to answer any of those questions, I'm just trying to say there's so much that we don't know.

If being a working girl was as simple as it sounds, I might have given it a ago myself. I even contemplated it, a friend and I looked into it. She's now working for an escort agency, though most of her bookings are in hour long slots. She's expensive, and at first it sounded glamorous. She does it just for the money. She's slept with maybe 100 clients, perhaps only 5 of those did she really like. She's also in a very safe environment, in a beautiful flat with other girls. Yet, that doesn't stop her from sleeping with clients that she despises and who make her feel sick. If it were glamorous and a lifestyle of fabulous clothes, lots of money and good looking men then that would be so appealing. But it isn't, there's so much to it. I realised a while ago, I'd never have the stomach to do it.

I also have to say it isn't just about age. Vanilla Gorilla said it was a career choice that didn't work because you started too young. I disagree. Some girls will start as young as yourself and will 'succeed'. Other girls start in their thirties and discover it was a poor choice for them. It works differently for different women. Had I gone along with the pressure and curiosity and started working with my friend, I think I'd be in a very dark place right now.

I think it's a poor choice for a lot of women, though can be a good choice for many too. It seems you discovered it wasn't such a good choice for you. I do believe that prostitution is an important industry, it brings money to girls in desperation and need (although also to those that enjoy the high-earning aspect when it would otherwise be easy for her to work a different career) and provides a service to those who use it for whatever reason, be it because they wouldn't get it otherwise or because they have issues and desperation at certain times. Yet I hear little from girls that do it because they love it, because they enjoy it. I almost wanted to hear that they did, but I find that all these girls love is the money. At the end of the day, a womans body is worth more than just money.

And although I understand the point that Jamaican Youth makes, I don't completely agree with it. I don't think anything you've ever done has been wrong. But I don't think that your not being emotionally attached to every guy you sleep with is necessarily a good thing either. Heartbreak is good for us all to some extent, it shakes us up and makes us strong, even if not instantly. Anyway, I think it's better to play the field, sleep with who you want to but definitely to enjoy it. The idea shouldn't be not to get emotionally attached, but not to care that you do. Let yourself enjoy men, to like them and to want to sleep with them. I'm not saying you should be monogamous, I'm saying you should atleast fancy them, even if you fancy several at once.

You're so sensible with the things that you say, sounds like you're close to being able to grasp what you want anyway, you certainly understand yourself. I'm not one who understands it enough to advise, though I wonder if perhaps learning to cut out the majority of men that you can't distinguish between wanting to fuck and allowing yourself to would be a good starting point. Sounds like all I've done is state the obvious really, but I think you really do have to start being more opinionated. It may well have to be the begining of a learning curve, but life is for learning. Good luck though, regardless.

 

The little effeminate gay dudes, the real faggy ones as the phrasing goes, in high school its not bashing they have to worry about its getting raped and mutilple times by "straight"guys that say they hate faggots, but they cant say that out loud becuase no one will believe them (including the girls) and they have to worry about getting their heads kicked in at a later date. So they dont, they go off to the school counsellor say they have to change classes cos of bullying or fear of getting bashed, or they tell their parents they are worried about getting bashed so they can change schools.

Then they grow up and have to listen to the churchies and the moral crusaders tell them how wrong gay is and how its all about them, and keep quite cos no one is going to believe them anyway. And the hippies can be just as bad, running around saying things like "beautiful soul" to each other, peach love and mung beans and yet when they encounter one of these little dudes, its giggle and push them away, or the huby gets a little more excited than he should be, wife picks up on that and all of a sudden its any excuse for her to push them away.

Then they might get dragged along by some old school friends to the wedding of one of those guys that raped them in high school, watch as he promises to love honour and commit to his wife, sitting in a pew watching a ceremony in a state/country / church that says he's not entitled to that ceremony.

Or rewind back to when that little dude was 8, his big sister or cousin already detected too much girliness, and her along with some of her friends did stuff to him to "straighten" him out. Naturally he can go around telling everyone, becuase they are all going to believe him.

Not my story, I'm one of those big scary ones everyone else likes to pretend doesnt exist


So, some nasty experiences for you in your previous employment, but at least everyone believes you, at least you had a certain amount of control


And then there is this:

What about those that dont get paid for it, dont have a choice? In your working career, giving that release to the nastier ones, how many vulnerable nieces, family friends or even daughters did you save from their advances? How many punches in the face did you stop their wives getting cos they were that little less frustrated and angry. How many rapes did you help avoid?

As I said, the worlds oldest profession, just as important as Police, Fire , Paramedics.

And if nothing else, your experiences will help sharpen your instincts with guys, make you a lot better at sorting out the a-holes from the good ones. Help you be better at controlling them, in the long run once you settle down and sort out whats really going on with you.


Or I could just patronise you, say some fluffy words and go back to pretending all of this kind of stuff doesnt exist

 

I don't disagree with anything that you've said. hah
Thank you

 

Yeah, that's fucking awful for the gays too. No shit. & GEE I don't know how I could possibly empathize with having to always watch your back.... It's not like any female who's ever walked anywhere alone at night ANYWHERE doesn't know that fear.

What people believe doesn't matter, because no matter what if you're telling the truth you will find someone who does.

& if that's what you think prostitution is good for... Preventing rapes and domestic abuse then we should just kill or lock up every asshole that decides to buy a woman's time. Yeah?

 

Heh, nice catch.

 

All this material crap in life doesnt matter in the end, the only important thing IS other people. Just what they really believe about you is stuff they will never say to your face. No one is going to have any kind of clue what it is to be you. Why are they telling you what to do with your life? Why are they judging? They dont know any better, they only have thier lives to compare yours with.

Your 19 and you are already a lot better at reading guys than most girls your age, most girls twice your age. Your strong, tough, resourceful and I bet you're like the boss of the girls when you are amongst a group of them

You've devalued sex with men, why is that a bad thing? Cos everyone else tells you it is? How the fuck would they know? All these girls your age that have only had a handful of boyfriends that dont last past two minutes in the sack. What about the girls that have only had one lousy boyfriend and dont want to give him up for fear of not being able to get another

You think your sex life is in the toilet? compared to whose? The plain jane your age thats only ever had a single drunken fumble in the back seat of some randoms car? The woman that married her high school sweetheart and spent the next 20 years with sex being when he's done, sex is done.

Any time any one else ever judges you, you've really got to ask yourself why the fuck they are doing it. Even if it looks like empathy and is all cutesy they are still thinking they are better than you. They are still getting a buzz from thinking they know whats best, a little ego trip from thinking "come do things my way, so you can be as good as me, cos only I know"

Its usually the people that dont judge you dont try and tell you how to live your frickin life, that everyone ends up liking the most anyway

And finally:

Not all of them are assholes, but by retirement age pretty much almost all of them see prostitutes, its not too hard to work out the math. If they say they havent you've only got their word to go on

 

I'm actually 18, the thing read my age wrong on here when I put in the date. hah. But yes, thank you. You're pretty much right on with most of the things you said here. & thanks.

hah, I don't actually think that all johns are assholes. In fact, when I stopped I actually sort of missed a few of my regulars. This guy Louie and I had a pretty sweet friendship going. He would pick me up and drop me off and he always bought me coffee or pizza, and he was just this really normal guy who hated having to play games with girls to get laid. So he just paid me. I totally understood, and agreed.