I Hate Being Addicted!!

I hate being addicted - I think it is a personality trait - cause anything I do that give me a high I am addicted to. Point to demonstrate -

I have a script for Hydrocodone 10/325... I take about 30mg - get a nice high - then in 3 hours I take a little more and on and on. I can try to let it go but it's like my mind goes into neutral and there is only one thing to do - take more - No I better not - it is not there - I take the drug. After a few days on I start getting sick - but keep right on until I'm too sick to do more - recover for a couple of days and decide - no more. When I feel better - I'm back on again - no thought process just - I need more and there's no argument between me and me.

Is that like, typical for an addict?

 

ahahaahahhaha theres some stupid ass thread about some dipshit who 'likes being addicted' on the main page of the psychedelic forums.

im glad you started this one tho. 61 years of age has a lot more credability than some dumbass 22 year old.

 

Yes, you are an addict. Success!!

You need to figure out what is more important in life, do you have anything to work towards that will help you stay off the vicodin? Do you have any legit pain that you NEED to take these?

How long have you been like this?
How do you think you will feel in a few years when you continue on this path?
What other opiates have you been taking? If its just vicodin, then wow, because compared to other opiates, vicodin is shit.

 

No, it's a personality defect. I also have a pretty addictive personality.

 

Thanks man - I appreciate the insight. I'm not sure about the simplicity of your "choice" theory. It's a choice, certainly - but it is a very complex road that leads you down the proper road. Literally, my thought process clears and I see only one choice - the negative is blocked out. Actually all thought is blocked out except timing of when I will use. Now or in 15 minutes - that is my choice as I see it.

Let's say you are just out of jail after 6 months - you call a girl you know likes you and is not a virgin - but would rather sex be for feelings and not for your friend's relief - I've been there. For me - dispite my liberal sensibilities - there is only one choice. The rest are buried in a sound proof room.

I have coped with this loss of control for 61 years but it is no less. Honestly, it is no fun - unfeeling, selfcentered and hurtful. But I do not think of this when the object is before me.

The guy who said in the other post that addiction is fun is full of shit - or he simply a nacisistic freak.

I say all this sitting here with a nice buzz on.

I wish I could have a ton of whatever - get high on the weekend and save the rest for a later time - when it might be a nice time to get a little buzzed. Just not possible for me. I envy those who can.

 

yea your on the road to dependency.. and if thats not a road your familair with i can assure you, you wanna stay far away from it. once your brain has decided that your body cant function without opiates in it your fucked. the withdrawal from this is a m-f-er ... i was addicted to heroin for 10 years outa my life. and the withdrawal is no different from shooting 10 pills of dope a day to eating a handfull of vicodins a day.. just my .02

 

Yep - Same boat and it sucks. I wish people could understand the delema we are in - actually I wish I could undertand.

 

well im in my early 30s now i havent touched an opiate other than when i had a kidney stone and a hernia surgery in the last 4+ years. but i struggled with opiates from the time i was 16 till i was 27.. and it wasnt a pleasureable 11 years of my life. im glad that its behind me now. at least for now anyway.. never say never..

 

I feel you, Evry thing I try, and that I end up liking, Imma do it till there no more and will be wanting it bad. I have a super addictpersonality.

 

Me too brother - I wish I knew what it was really about. It sucks.

 

Addiction can be good, you can stay in a very happy place for as long as you like. Just certain things are worse to be addicted to than others, and you can't be full blown addicted either, its called a controlled addict.

 

controlled addict???? what. i think what you mean is when a 'hobby' turns dangerous.....

 

Addiction has a real simple solution: Stop using. Not being able to stop isn't a "personality defect," it's a weakness of character.

 

How exactly does a "hobby" turn dangerous? This is exactly my point, is that addiction can be with ANYTHING that makes somebody happy. We are all addicted to water, food, socialization, excercise. Nobody points those things out as addiction because they are GOOD FOR YOU. There are also neutral things to get addicted to, such as weed, video games, movies, and then there are bad things to be addicted to such as opiates, cocaine. The difference is that most people get addicted to the BAD things, because they provide more PLEASURE. You have to know where to draw the line for harmless addiction and harmful addiction. I myself was addicted to video games and weed hardcore every day for a couple years, and i'm as happy as can be. I know that others might consider that a waste, but i used my time exactly the way i wanted to and i'm proud of it.

 

I'm addicted to getting fukt up, regardless of what the drug is. I ALWAYS feel the need to be under the influence of some sort of psychoactive substance. I'm not addicted to any specific drug, so I refer to my addiction as a "non-specific drug addiction"

I don't mind it though. It's just that I have never been happy, even before I started using drugs, but I'm happy while I'm using drugs, so I don't mind being addicted.

 

This ^^

 

Well most people would call themselves a Garbage Can with addiction to just being fk'd up. Though it seems with me I love a drug sooo much we have wonderful times then sadly it breaks my heart and we get together every once and a while for a bootycall.

 

Sounds to me like you are one of those pompous s***heads that does not have this problem so anybody who does is a weak kneed characterless pile of sludge. Unfortunatly, you probably have your own problems that seem like pile of steamy shit which can easilty be washed down the drain with a water hose to me. Maybe it's your judgemental nature.

Screw you - let's hear from people with empathy and answers.

 

To the OP. We all have our demons. We use to forget or numb the bad feelings. I just hate feeling like myself really. Life can be so boring. I don't get terribly messed up. I just take normal doses several times a day. I have a good life and the meds keep me from being bored.

 

Dood, stfu! Get over it already! Jesus man, you are a stupid asshole. I knew that you were gay. If anyone reads that thread they can see that you are, what? A drug poser? How lame is that?

Get over it already, looser....