So, I'm pretty much reeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaally sexually confused at this point. Let me start by saying I'm terrible when it comes to relationships, thats's not my problem. The problem is that I'm having problems figuring out where I stand on the whole sexuality thing. Picture a Venn Diagram, only the 2 circles (one Hetero, one Homo) each have a flag somewhere on the ring and are rotating at differing speeds. Everytime a flag hits the intersection, that side gains more power over my sexuality. When the flags hit the center at the same time, I'm 50/50; but since Hetero is faster, it gains more momentum. Yet my romantic side of me is almost always gay. I hate all romance novels and movies if they involve hetero couples, men are the only ones I could really curl up and snuggle with, even if it's not sexually. So, I'm just wondering if anyone else here has hit a point like this or BETTER, if anyone IS like this and could tell me about it and what they do, it would be very helpful. I know that in the end I should just do what feels right NOW and what truely makes me feel happy, but the discussion would be helpful.
Late reply, but fuck it. Have to say, that was definitely one of the more interesting ways of describing your sexuality! When I was first questioning myself, funnily it was in the same sort of manner. I found being strait was more myself inclined, but had romantic feelings, and cuddlier ones with men. Most men would find themselves going the other way, feeling sexual urges which begin their soul searching. However, I stepped back and figured how to go abut this 'attraction', if you could have called it that. I first decided whether I had ANY sexual attraction to men, which I quickly determined I did. I did always find them attractive, and realized I had lusted after them for years. I had always put it down to perhaps envy. The only thing left to try, since I still was 100% convinced, was to actually become sexually involved with a bloke. I did, and then discovered that in fact, I was gay. I think heterosexuality became something I expected to be, but ultimately wasn't. I didn't believe I would go against the grain, the common practice. All in all, since the romantic side was there. I took to the scene like a duck does to water, and was able to jump strait in with relationships others may have been more hesitant with. I never looked back since, although I still can find a girl attractive, but in the same way I could say my sister can look nice. Maybe you need to just explore the sexual side of homosexuality, cliche as it sounds. Although you may just have a romanticized view of the scene, from the movies you watch! Good luck.
Don't Worry your not alone, I deal with the same problem. I love how you desribed it as a Venn Diagram, very true! My sister told me that a man's sexuality is like a timeline, it's either gay or straight and not usually in between. I say go with what you feel you might find the right one and when the time comes and your truley in love you'll be ready.
have you been in a relationship with a guy and one with a girl? you should, and then see/feel the difference. I think the romantic aspect of attraction is much more important than sexual. Cuz its easier and better to obtain the sexual aspect from the romantic, rather than vice-versa. and i see sex as more of a party or fun thing where everyone should try different things cuz why not? its just sex. but with romantic feelings, it's not something you can really control. its more of a valuable thing rather than a temporary feeling of an orgasm.
So, I forget about things easily. EXAMPLE: I forget about posting on the forums ALL THE TIME. But I have been taking note of a few different things. First off (something I didn't mention in my first post), I've been breaking up with a girl for several months now. Doesn't sound like it makes any sense, but I want to be her friend, but she is above and beyond the point of being in love with me. So it's becoming very difficult to do; this has been going on since early Summer. I mention this because the exhaustion from this has pretty much halted my libido and I don't really get turned on by anyone. I'm just wondering: is there a difference, for men, between being turned on by someone and being attracted to someone? As well as between those 2 things and getting hard? This seems like something that may seem very obvious to people, so don't mock me for it, I'm really not sure and it's worse now since the whole relationship thing has completely screwed me up and nothing really gets me sexually attracted anymore. :/
