spreading the love through non-aggressive ways

i'm currently in a local production that is being catered. after each show they have been leaving plates made up for the cast and crew to eat, but the sixth show (tonight) they made up two vegetarian plates (they had a veg option for others, but were only making up plates with ribs and chicken for us). (our house manager made a special request.) it its no big secret that we do not consume flesh, but we don't try to push it or be all angry about it. tonight, as we were eating, one of my fellow cast mates (we're talking in her probably her 60s) started asking me questions about how long i've been vegetarian and what was my reasonings (especially interested after we started talking about my GERD). she's already talking about limiting her meat and about changing her diet. she had to leave, but made sure i knew the conversation wasn't over and would be continued.

i'm not out to force my lifestyle or my choices onto the world, but it is nice to know that my non-aggressive, non-threatening ways are being accepted. (after offering tofu stir-fry at my house after a show one night along side my brother's sloppy joes and hotdogs there became a vivid realization among cast and crew that there were two vegetarians and one semi).

it just goes to show you that sometimes you can make the most positive impact by not threatening others to be like you. live by example, not threats and attacks.

 

i hear what you're saying man. for me i just try to talk about it as little as possible. most of my friends are veggies and when the ones who aren't ask about it i try to just keep quiet. it seems like a lot of the time it doesn't matter what you say, you'll look militant. also i don't ever like to tell people they're wrong even if its a fact that they are, like if they try to tell me that you can't live without meat, or that animals are treated well on farms. its good that you could have a conversation with this woman though, and its awesome to know that there are people out there willing to listen and accept!

 

It's best not to be forceful and outfront about your vegetarian. Just be a chilled out, happy vegetarian, and people will accept you. The minute you start actively trying to change minds, people will resist it and resent you.

 

i've never been forceful. i just can't be like that over my views (it does you know good). its nice to know that not being militant can pay off by ppl who are genuinly interested and nothing feeling threatened by me.

 

They really ought to have veggie specialized catering services...

 

That's great

I just get on with, if people want to learn more then they know where to come. Though of course I can hold my own in debate.

 

i have gotten to hate the debates. i just want to live my life and not be judged for it.

 

The book 'The Choice Theory' by Psychologist William Glasser gives excellent case histories, and examples of how to do just what you describe. His whole premise is that you can only change yourself, and if others around you are not doing as you wish, do not try to change them. Funnily enough, if you don't try to change them, but just respect and love them, that is your best bet for them to try to change.
Really good book.

 

Excellent advice, and very mature of you to allow that the alternative method works too. I have seen your method in action, and it is sometimes quite effective in the short term.

 

Absolutely. Forceful and aggressive approaches never work. Don't accuse, just inform. Many people are open to the information.

 

Ugh, reminds me of when I tried to convert everyone when I was 15. Doesn't work a damn bit. Yet, I stopped and had a friend who became a vegan briefly. Later I met my love, who isn't veg, and I expressed my opinions, but didn't push him. I share my food, and he likes it, and likes trying new things, and that's better than nothing.

 

and the love continues to overpower aggression and anger. it makes me feel all warm inside.