Do you have any funny stories?

quote of the year thread...

 

here's a couple stories i posted in another thread:

brandy (the same chick i mentioned in the story before) and me were walking next to each other on the way to the lunch room. she was babbling to herself as usual. i asked her "hey brandy, who ya talking to?" she responded in a deranged sort of way "gooooooood" (god). i pointed in front of her and was like "is he right there in front of you?" she nodded in the same deranged sort of way. so i punched the air right in front of her face. i turned to her and asked "did i get him?" she looked kinda stunned, as if she was waiting for me to feed her delusion and then after a second or so nodded. i was like, what's he doing. she responded "crying" then she starts spazzing out and practically screams at me "say son of isaac. son of jacob. say you're sorry! say you're sorry!" i walked away laughing.

there was this dude whose room was across the hall from me. his name was brad. big dude, 6'2, 220. pretty buff. i lifted weights with him. he got kinda a bad rap on the unit for being weird, but he was a pretty nice guy. anyway, just by coincadence, me and this other guy were wearing cream colored pants and a cream colored shirt. me, him, and this other chick (the most able to maintain a normal attitude or whatnot) were invited to go see some play. anyway, brad comes up to me before we're about to head out and says "dude, i know there's something about to go down and i don't want any part of it" when i asked him what he was talking about he says that he's worried about the cream colored gang. i walk away for a second. then come back and start going off. "dude, i don't want anything to happen to you, dude, the shit is about to hit the fan. just stay in your room. dont come out for any reason. just stay in your room. the shit is about to hit the FUCKing fan!"
i then leave for the play. when i come back, staff came up to me and asked me not to do that again. apparently they didn't like dealing with him. lol
i felt pretty bad for that one. he was a nice guy. had a hard life. it's still kinda funny though.

 

More of a funny picture than a funny story. When I get up in the morning and look out of the bathroom window while I brush my teeth, I very often find a single pair of knickers hanging on my neighbours line to dry. It's always just one pair of knickers! I think it is funny, so I decided to take a photo ans post it here. This old woman who lives next door really mad.

 

^^^^^^^^

:rofl::smilielol5::rofl: thanks for sharin that with us :rofl:

 

My best friend won't appreciate this but I don't care.

Our friend Walt had given me a peppermint because he knows it's my favorite hard candy. I had been sucking on it quite a while when Jenn (my best friend) offered me half of her stick of gum. I took it and chewed up the peppermint in my mouth and then popped in the gum. She had been looking at a book and she turned to me all serious and confused and asked, "How did you get a crunchy half?" I laughed so hard I cried.

 

I have so many hilarious stories, but sadly, most of them are "You had to be there to get it" type situations. Mostly weird stuff that us theatre and speech geeks would do.

One time at a speech tournament at a different school, during some down time, my friends on my team and I all decided to gather around and stare at one specific spot in the ceiling like there was something terribly interesting up there. We did it for a good long time and several passers-by stopped to try to figure out what we were staring at. This went on for a good long time, and finally a guy from another team came up and shook our hands because he had been watching the whole time and was amazed that we were able to keep it up for so long and baffle so many people. He said there were people all over the school wondering "what was up with the cafeteria ceiling." Hahahaha! That same tournament, my good friend Scott cleared his throat, dusted off his suit, and pulled a chair out, then stood on it and did his impression of a screech owl. Then he took a bow, stepped down, put the chair back under the table, then proceeded to his next debate round, as if nothing had even happened.

On Daniel's birthday, we had a birthday party/going away party for Scott (he joined the coast guard the next week), and our roommate's brother got HAMMERED and he took off all of his clothes except his boxers, all while slurring about how he had too much respect for us to remove his underwear. He then proceeded to go from walking a couple of steps, to crawling, then he just sprawled out on the floor and all of his junk fell out. The boxers were rendered completely useless. He then laid in the hall for 45 minutes talking nonstop about everything and absolutely nothing. It was one of the funniest things ever.

I'll give it some thought and try to come up with better stories that aren't "you had to be there" type stories, though.

 

All that comes to mind is this, which happened when a guy I know was smoking weed while my friend and I were hanging out with him (I had a drug test coming up in two days):

My friend smelled the smoke and said, "That smells EXACTLY like this tea my dad has. He has a plastic bag this big [it was actually really big] of it--it's like... it looks like torn/ground up leaves or something, maybe. He keeps it under his bed." We were just like, "Uh... dude... that's not tea."

 

:smilielol5: Thanks guys. Hahaha I love them.

TH your friend sounds very blonde.

Ganj, you have a crazy neighbour. :leaving:

Ramona, your friends sound awesome!

Vena... :rofl:

 

I've told it here... did you read my gay' story.

 

I can't help but laugh every time this comes up...when the hubby and I first met he was always working on his olds cutlass. He's a big mortorhead. One day he was on the base at Ft. Ritchie at one of his seargents barracks we were going to have a cookout and when I got there he was sitting at the picnic table with a bloody towel to his face. I was all shocked and asked him what happened...when he told me he'd got his nose hole hooked on the old school pop up doorlock when he was reaching into the backseat to get his beer I about peed my pants. He about ripped his right nostril off but omg!!! I have never been able to look at him the same. I mean really...how's that happen???