Don't feel bad, I know what it feels like to get your heart ripped out and stepped on by a perfect angel you thought was devine that you shared your whole life with but you need to move on this experiance has just made you that much stronger. Do what you think is right. The way you described yourself I see no reason you should feel better soon. The only thing between you and that perfect girl is love and it draws you bother closer every second.
well this might seem lame but ive never really even had a relationship or gf, but ive had to deal with getting turned down alot by girls that ive wanted to get to know. I mean ive had girls want me ,some that were goodlooking and some that wernt. I just wasnt into them then, or else i thought they were messing with me which they probably wernt. I had a bad experience once which explains why i didnt trust the ones that liked me. Right now id like a gf but the ones i go after are not worth my time. I met a girl at school and she seemed like she could be a good person, i mean when i met her she shook my hand and told me her name, she seemed different compared to the majority I talked to her and she said i could talk to her again and i did a few times and ive seen her and she always said hi to me she seemed friendly. Then recently i told her that i wanted to be better friends with her and she told me to talk to her on friday in the cafeteria. She never showed, and the other place she goes she wasnt there either. It seems like she isnt what i thought and is like the rest. I mean if a girl realy likes a guy it seems to me that she will say then and there when u ask them something, instead of saying talk to me.....on this day. Thats just a reason to make up an excuse..etc Do you think i should forget her altogther? You see the point im trying to make is i dont think a guy should have to play a cat and mouse game, she is the one who screwed up. No wonder some guys want girls from other countries since they know how to respect a guy. American girls have too much power..etc. Well anyone that would like to respond and give me some advice feel free too....
I am very sorry. I know what it is like to be left in thought I hate it, becuase at those times your mind wonders and thinks about all the sad deppressing things about your life or the world in general. As for the girl I know how you feel I hate having my heart broken and breaking hearts it really hurts. No matter what you will still have these feelings for her. You can never just stop completely loving or caring for someone it is nearly impossible. Beacause no matter how awful the break up was it's hard to forget the good times, and those tend to be the things that haunt you. I know exactly how you feel venting is very good and a healthy way to get out emotions, and esspecially good for you becuase your getting feed back. I have been hurt so many times there is always that certain person that you love and want so badly, but they always seem to be the person you can't have. Life isn't the best it kicks you when your down believe me I have been through a lot of stuff (even though I'm only 16 lol). I just wanted to let you know that you should let out your feelings out it is a good thing to do. However don't let these feelings eat you up inside try to get out and do something to distract your mind from being sad. I really hope you feel better I hate when people are sad....
Thank you for the reply innocent. I am the same way, I will always love that girl after what we shared. It amazes me how somebody can "love" another person, then hate them after they break up. And yes, venting is a good outlet. Although I usually vent in my weird abstract poems. Thanks for wishing me to feel better, I do, it was just one of those lonely nights I guess.
quote: Ginseng, how old are you bud? You shouldn't jump to any conclusions about the girl. Maybe she was scared? I am 23. She was scared how so? Well you see im not sure if what i said made it too clear to her that i like her more than a friend and want to see more of her besides just at school? all i said was that id like to be better friends with her, and so she said to talk to her on friday and that id see her in the cafeteria. I dont know if i mentioned in this forum that everytime ive talked to her she has a friend that shes with, i dont know if that could screw things up? Because when i talked i looked mostly at her and it makes sense i mean im not interested in her friend. Are some girls that are over 20 ?,still worried about hurting their friends feelings because that is so childish. I knew a girl once that was 18 and she liked me and i tried to get to know her but she always had her friends around and alot of them guys and they were kind of assholes and made fun of me as well as i wasnt comfortable showing who i am in that setting. I asked if shed like to just go out with just me and her and she said well these are my friends and if u cant get along with my friends it will never work out. Talk about immature.
Well just say you want to spend some time with her alone and outside of school. If she doesn't appreciate that, and want to spend time with you alone as well, she isn't worth your time. You seem like a nice guy, just be confident and be yourself. It will all work out.
Oh, and some people are scared of confrontation, expressing feelings, intimacy, or rejecting someone they don't feel a connection with.
Hey see in blonde. Just found myself relating to your original post. I think one of the hardest feelings is hoping she finds someone good enough for her. And her moving on definitely brings back some very strong emotions that seemed to have been gone. You said something about wondering if you should not talk to her anymore but not thinking you could do it. I say definitely keep that friendship. Personally I'd love for us to stay friends, but the situation got a little wierd and crazy for a while and now it's hard to even have a conversation, it's just very awkward. I know if we could get past it we could have the most beautiful friendship in the world because we know each other better than we know ourselves. So I'd hold on to that if I were you. Sounds like you were having one of those nights like I have after talking to her and finding myself listening to a little too much Damien Rice! Anyway, I hope it all works out well.
I'm going to have to be the guy to disagree and be a bit of a dick here. If she cheated on you, no matter how you feel about her, she should be cut cleanly from your life. You can still love her many months or even years later, but she shouldn't be a part of your life anymore. That's unhealthy. If a relationship ended on such terms, a real friendship is simply not a possibility. You seem like a good guy, and she doesn't deserve someone like you. Okay, so she goes to parties and has a "bad" time and needs a shoulder to cry on. You're not an asshole if you deny her that shoulder. You shouldn't be her pillow or her comfort blanket. That's simply a disgusting way for someone to treat someone else. She's a big girl, I mean, she's obviously atleast college age. Let her deal with her problems like someone who's potty trained. It's not up to you to solve the world's problems for her. And yes, Innocent, the world kicks you when you're down, but if you're a vigilant and determined person, as well as a strong person, those down periods will be greatly outwieghed by the up periods. There are two sides to the world. The depressed people are those who see only that dark side, and care not to find someone and something else to make them happy. I'm glad you're happy being single, I'm the same way right now. It's very healthy to be happy with yourself. I'm personally disgusted by those human beings who need another human to be happy. They'll be the ones hanging from the ceiling one day. It's just not a good way to be. I've had beautiful girls (which honestly makes it that much harder) whom I truely loved cheat on me and then try to rekindle the 'flame'. I didn't allow that to happen. I just went out and found someone else. I don't believe there's one true love out there. I believe you can truely love hundreds of thousands of people who are walking the earth right now. And other hundreds of thousands you'd truely not be able to stand. It's really just up to the person who lost the relationship to get back up and find that other person. You would be suprised how easily you forget someone you loved when you've found another to fill your days. Although, like I said, filling that void simply for the sake of filling that void is a bad way to be. Some people just can't let go, I don't get it, but they can't. I think to truely be able to let go you have to be able to love yourself and know what you have to offer the market. You have to know you're a lucrative commodity, if you will. If you think you're a bag of Twinkies, you're going to have a hard time letting go of what you perceive to be a Maserati. If that makes any analogous sense at all. lol If, on the other hand, you realize that you yourself are a 'high quality Italian sports car', you're going to be A:much happier which in turn means much healthier B:much more confident and C:much more able to find another worthwhile human being after losing one. Life gets that much easier when you've come to terms with yourself. The people who end up depressed and lonely are the people who perpetuated sorrow. They wasted valuable time they could have been spending finding a much better woman (or man) sitting around sulking about the last instead. No matter how much I love her, if she cheats, I've gotta tell her to get going. Not worth my time. I've got better things to do than sulk about some human being who obvously didn't find me valuable enough to remain faithful.
...and of course, YOUR version of love comes from YOU! It's what YOU feel inside, not what someone else can give you...Everyone seems to have a different version, so the best we can hope for in sharing OUR versions with each other is a mutual understanding for those versions...One day she will realise what she has missed out on, and that will be your gift to her... the mark of your true friendship, but to hang around waiting for that moment is denying her that realisation. She will never evolve into her personal butterfly until you stop being her coccoon...and vice versa! S
This website is full of the nicest people I have run into on the web. Thanks everyone. I will reply more later, I have an exam in an hour.
