My primary partner (female) averages taking a shower 2-3 times a week. I shower every day. This has affected my sexual connection with her for some time. It is now starting to affect the general relationship (from my perspective) as I become disinterested in spending time or even talking with her. I perceive the behavior as a lack of general courtesy. I especially have difficulties explaining why I do not want to be intimate (after three days with no shower) or even be close during that time. I have tried to be tactful in my approach (telling her how good she smells or becoming sexually interested follwing a shower) to no avail. I am starting to not want to go out her in public during these times as well. Otherwise, she is great in almost every other way - she is young, slender, a very pretty face, and a great personality. I need advice on how to handle this situation without damaging the relationship or some thoughts about my perspectives. Thank you for your assistance.
tell her that sex in the shower is one of your fantasies, take her in there soap her up and get'r done... no ones' feelings have to be hurt.
^^^It sounds like this is becoming an issue in more than just his sex life, but that's a great start. Anyway, I suspect that your partner is oblivious to the problem; I doubt she would perceive that it bothers you and continue to do it. Also, I don't think she is going to be hyper-sensitive about the issue. People who are self-conscious about hygiene tend to be meticulously clean. I would just be honest with her about the fact that sometimes her hygiene can be off putting. Of course, be gentle about it; you can make some reference to that fact that its summer and hot and you've noticed it become a problem. She'll probably be a little embarassed, but if the relationship is strong, you'll move passed it.
I know exactly how you are feeling. My ex would sometimes not shower for a week. It definitely affect the relationship, sex with him was a major put off when he wasn't clean. Finally I talked to him about it and found out that he had panic attacks in the shower. So he didn't like showering alone. So we started doing it together and it really help, plus it was fun too. Just tell her about it, be kind of gentle. If you have a relationship with her you should be able to communicate what you need from her, without her being angry or upset.
she could be clueless to the way you feel about it and how you're perceiving it. try bringing it up next time after she showers and tell her how much you love it when she's clean and you'd like her to try it more often. i'd just try to be as positive about it as possible while remaining honest.
i actually agree with this...but some people just arent assertive/agressive as others, if it were this simple for the Op he would've done it already.... i know i've had to tell my lover to clean himself up before, wasnt a big deal and he invited me to help him...how hot is that?!
You're funny . Be honest and also let her know how much you Love her and invite her to shower with you, don't slip on the soap
lol, i feel like my lady showers too often (daily). im someone who really appreciates a healthy body odor.
