Cant cum with out touching myself

Discussion in 'The Orgasmic Experience' started by needsomefun, Jun 30, 2009.

  1. needsomefun

    needsomefun Member

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    Ya so here is the storie... no matter how kinky how crazy or what not. i cant come from just sex. i have to touch my self while my girl is on top to cum with her.. it sucks but thats it. i hve tried not masterbaiting but it just does not feel good enough does anyone have any advice?
     
    needsomefun, Jun 30, 2009
    #1
  3. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Super Moderator

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    is it just the one position? If so, well, change positions after she's had an orgasm.
     
    drumminmama, Jun 30, 2009
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  5. needsomefun

    needsomefun Member

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    no its not just one position.... its every position :( sigh i dont know what to do
     
    needsomefun, Jul 1, 2009
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  7. Pentum

    Pentum Member

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    Chill out during sex. Relax completely and forget that you can't have an orgasm that way. Just relax to the fullest and get your girl in the position you like the most. Make her look the way it turns you on to the max without her knowing it. Should work. It's all in your head, so chill.
     
    Pentum, Jul 2, 2009
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  9. needsomefun

    needsomefun Member

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    See i have tried that and a lot of diffrent girls.. i dont know i guess i will keep trying i think i think too much but it just does not feel good enough
     
    needsomefun, Jul 3, 2009
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  11. Fastswitch

    Fastswitch Visitor

    Why not relax and learn to live with your 'curse?' I've heard of a lot worse problems......
     
    Fastswitch, Jul 3, 2009
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  13. needsomefun

    needsomefun Member

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    ya it sucks though cause i dont like to jack off when i am with a girl... it just sucks.. i dont know if would be so much better to cum insdie them heh
     
    needsomefun, Jul 4, 2009
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  15. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Super Moderator

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    what if she does the touching?
     
    drumminmama, Jul 4, 2009
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  17. arthur itis

    arthur itis Senior Member

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    It's a fallacy to think that you've got to either 1) be mutual and simultaneous, or 2) always get yours. Be a giver. Learn to SERVE the other, not merely yourself. If you learn to be a generous giver, the benefit will come back to you eventually. The pressure builds up, and eventually, it's GOTTA happen for you.

    If not, then let your inhibitions go, and do the pearl necklace. All's fair,,,
     
    arthur itis, Jul 4, 2009
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  19. needsomefun

    needsomefun Member

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    Well when she touches me its just not the same pressure and well its not the same its hard to explain but its just diffrent pressure on diffrent places... and i mean i have ben a giver for like 10 years+ lol i want to take now!! haha do they have sugrey or something for this?
     
    needsomefun, Jul 6, 2009
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  21. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Super Moderator

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    sounds like some communication is in order.
    sex with new partners is hot, furious and all that, but when the tidbits of info get exchanged (I like when you touch like that..no more pressure.. etc) it gets amazing.
    And that exchange is awkward at first, so just get through it.
    I try to notice how my partner touches himself. We're pretty new, and still in a learning curve, so I ask if I'm not sure on a reaction.
    I pay a lot of attention to his eyes. But we've been buds for a long time and I sort of get the language in his eyes.

    Generally, we do to other what we want done. Make sense?
    I really like a lot of skin contact, and waking up that response makes the experience so much better, so I use a lot of all over touch before getting to the typical erogenous zones. But I "listen" to my partner and note the pressure he uses and match it. He does the same, so we can cross those signals, which is funny....we do what we know.
     
    drumminmama, Jul 9, 2009
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  23. NikkiLou6387

    NikkiLou6387 ~peace~

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    you have a paraphilia. one common treatment i satiation therapy in which you should masturbate, but after you cum, keep masturbating for another hour. don't stop, just keep going. it should start to hurt, and therefore you shouldn't want to do it anymore. it usually only takes one treatment, but if you still have the urge to masturbate, you should try it one more time before. otherwise you may need more extensive therapy.
     
    NikkiLou6387, Jul 14, 2009
    #12
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