Fuck you Orison!!!

My Friday night was pretty fun. I got seriously drunk that night.

I stayed at my friends dads house and both our girlfriends stayed too.

We were all sitting in the basement around 3 AM and my friend said "Oh shit" and he ran to the bathroom and started puking.

I was already kind of feeling a little too drunk but I wasn't gonna throw up..... Until I heard him puke. Whenever I see/hear/smell someone puke I throw up. It just happens I don't know why.

Anyway I went upstairs and realized "hey, I don't hear him anymore. Now I don't have to throw up anymore, yay!" So I started walking back down stairs and I thought "hey, maybe if I go make myself throw up now I won't be hungover in the morning".

So I went in the bathroom and forced myself to lose my liquor.


Ok, so everyone is in bed and it's like 4:30 AM.

I'm laying there with my girlfriend and we were both wide awake. I kept hearing these weird fuckin' noises. Then I remembered one of my other buddies said "Yo, don't sleep upstairs man. There's squirells that'll jump on ya".

I was thinking "Oh shit, there's squirells in here". I tried to tell my girlfriend but evertime I tried to tell her there were squirells in the room I would start laughing.

So I just decided not to tell her.

Ok anyway we both finally fell asleep.

(here's the main part of the story that I couldn't even believe happened.)


I wake up the next morning, my girlfriend was still laying there sleeping..

So I lay there for like 10 minutes and I feel her touching my feet, I moved them and then 3 seconds later I heard some weird fuckin' noise and I jumped right out of the fuckin' bed yelling "squirell!!!" my other buddy came runnin' in with a pellet gun and yelled "I've got you now you little ******!!"

He starts shooting up the entire room, and the squirell jumped right out of the second story window (threw a hole in the screen) landed on a powerline and ran away.

My friend started yelling "Fuck, every weekend I come up here that squirell attacks someone and I never get to kill it.... Shit, lets go wake and bake".

Oh ya, and I wasn't hungover at all that day. The others were though so I laughed at them... Maybe making yourself throw up before you actually do throw up is a hangover cure lol.


lol I just felt like posting my friday night lol. :cheers2:

BTW: fuck you orison, and your damn squirells scaring the shit out of me!!

 

Ahahahahahhaha.

 

It was funny until your friend opened his mouth.

 

^^ The squirrel was black and apparantly he nicknamed it "******".

 

Lol, even better

 

But you gotta admit the thing is a little fuckin' asshole. It's woken up 4 people now.

 

Lol, why don't they just get someone to take it outside or set up a harmless trap with nuts inside.

 

Yeah, those black squirls are more squirly that most. We have a group of them here. They used to be only located in one area and they have been spreading out over the last couple of years. I read an article that they came from somewhere but I forget it now. We only have one that comes by my house. I have not named it yet. Not that I am going to call it what your friend did.

 

hahaha now THAT is a great story!!!

 

My high school astronomy teacher used to have an albino one that always used to go in her back yard.She'd always say how she tried to shoot it with a pellet gun.lol poor thing.

 

This is not normal.

 

Yeah, whoa betide the squirrel that crosses me. I have a pistol crossbow, a bb rifle and other sundry weapons. Hunting squirls in the Chicago suburbs is illegal. I would like to see them catch me.

 

lmao, a pistol crossbow?! Who the fuck has a pistol crossbow?? hahahaha. That make me crack up man. You rock.

 

wtf is that anyway? like a dart gun pistol bow or some shit?

 

Yeah, its like a pistol with the top that has a bow on it. It shoots a little dart type thing. They are fucking hilarious.

 

ummmm what??

 

lmao, did you make that orison?

 

wow greeeat fuckin story! Laughed my ass off!!!

 

no, but it is new?

 

To me. I owned a pet squirel once. It was awesome until it started to get crazy.

I would walk into the house and hear this "dadadaddada" sound from his throat like he was mad or something. Then I would feel this sharp pain all over my body and see him on my shoulder. He would leap off the cabinets on me and run all over my body in a half second the stop on my should to feed him nuts. He was awesome until he started to scare everybody and tear up the cabinets... I had to let him go outside. And to think, I raised that little mother fucker from childhood... (he fell out of his nest with a girl, but the girl died a few weeks later from falling 4 feet! I thought they could handle like 100ft drops. (not that I droped her)).