It would truly be amazing to feel happy again. Ever since my ex-girlfriend started fucking my best friend, my life has really become confusing and diabolical. Whats really terrible is that he lives next door. My friend and i have slowly drifted apart.. we're 22 now and have known each other for 18 years. We used to catch the kindergarten bus together, we graduated highschool together . We had a great childhood together but since highschool graduation (2006) things have drifted. As soon as i started dating this girl that we both knew he became noticably detached. To make a long story short, I had a serious drug problem and pushed him and my girl out of my life through reckless behavior and lies. She started to confide in my neighbor, talking to him about the trainwreck of our relationship. As this started to happen something changed. I would write her and her responses sounded exactly like his, as if he were writing the response for her. His choice of words and opinions i recognized immediately. This sent me into shock to realize how they were both now against me. Its scary because ive known him for 18 years and i didnt even KNOW him. He backstabbed instantly for pussy. Sometimes i feel bitter about it all and sometimes i laugh because i know what hes going through. The girl is a succubus, a wolf in sheeps clothing and he doesnt even know. My thoughts are that shes trying to get back at me, by being in a relationship with my buddy. She can easily stay in my life because they are both right next door, they can flaunt easily. I feel a huge conspiracy against me and im about to break. Why would they stab so deeply? At first i thought she was trying to make me jealous but now i just think shes a true hoe. Its real hard for me to even chill in my backyard because i dont want to see them if theyre outside. It feels like highschool drama and theyre having a field day. I catch myself thinking about this shit constantly its making it so hard to just live life and be happy, i cant be in the moment anymore. A very contradictory feeling i have though is - I couldnt imagine having either of them in my life anymore. These relationships seem to be breaking down for a reason, maybe im weeding the fake bullshit people out of my life. Im just uber confused on how to react. Mainly i feel calm and collected but theres a huge urge inside of me to beat his fucking ass. There have been words exchanged lately, that resulted in him threatening to call the police. Im presenting myself to them as a guy who doesnt seem bothered, but really they should sleep with one eye open. Does anyone have any advice on helping me just let this go. Its been months, i feel like a stranger in my own yard, i feel consumed by how negative all of this is. I want to fuck shit up, but more so i want to just let it go and move on. I need to forgive and forget ; realize that theyre jus foolish kids but i cant.
Act, don't react. Don't resort to violence. You will not feel better for it, and the possible legal repercussions are not worth it. I doubt they are plotting or conspiring against you. Likely their feelings are similar to yours, betrayal, resentment etc. (On account of your deceitful and destructive nature during your drug time) The severing of a lifelong friendship is bound to hurt. It is a dramatic shift in your reality, and combined with the betrayal it is going to cause emotional turbulence. I would consider a move and a fresh start, if possible. It will make it easier to let go. I don't think I can offer much other advice. You seem aware you would be better off to forgive & forget, let it go, if you are unable to do that in your current environment, then a change in environment might help.
