a lil predicament

I don't get that "I'd love you to be in my wedding, but not the real you, only the image I want to project" give me a break! I mean I know it's his wedding day but still. Can't he accept you for who you are?
I'd start your dreads and tie them back for the wedding, shouldn't be too difficult.

 

seriously nobody will notice, and he is your brother he wont care, my guess is he doesnt and its the fiance who is trying t o make everything perfect, im sure she doesnt want anyone getting any attention on her day. it really should not be a problem, your brother should love you enough that he would have you stand up there beside you no matter what you look like. and in the end its a picture, do you really wanna look back on them thinking i was so stupid for not having dreads then, its your life my friend live it the way you think you should, but i dont think its a tough decision

 

thanks everyone for all the replies! really appreciate it...

a top hat would be pimp...but i dont think i could get away with any kind of hat in a church...

i guess i'll just have to keep talkin to him, hopefully i can make him understand where im comin from and all that jazz and we can come to some conclusion...again thanks for all the advice everyone

 

tell him to change his wedding plans to work around the top hat

 

i think its pretty acceptable for him to make his entire wedding around your top hat, he could move the service to a giant top hat

 

Your brother sounds like a dick.

It's pretty disrepectful of him, It's your body, your hair. Do what you want.
Don't try and reason with him, just be like "It's either I tie it back or wear a hat:hat:. your choice.

That's like you telling him, he needs to grow dreadlocks for your wedding.

Safe.

 

haha jason and pat

and grass hopper...no my bro isn't a dick...he just doesnt have the same frame of mind that i do...i do my best to be the "go with the flow live and let live" type, while he thinks closer to what normal society does...different life experiences form different opinions, and that's what's gotten us into this situation...

oh well...thanks again everyone, i really appreciate all the help !!!!!!!

i'll let everyone know what the result is...still waitin to hear back from that job though, which is really disappointing

 

dont wait for the job to call you.. ive done that so many times and therefore missed the job... when was the interview? wait maybe a couple more days then call them saying 'i had an interview, wonder where i stand..' or summat

 

second interview was yesterday...they said they were going to call me yesterday evening but i didnt hear from them...i called earlier today to check on the status, however the manager in charge of hiring was not in yet, i was told i would receive a call back when he got in...i will be calling back a lil while later if i still havent heard...

just sucks when they lead you to believe you got the job in the bag, and then they dont call when they say they're going to

 

yeah, i had an interview last year and they said theyd phone me either way within a fortnight.. did i get that phonecall? nope.

 

ok sounds like to me your best bet in this whole thing is a clean lookin tam
nokbody will see your hair
and youll look "presentable" to the crowd and for pictures

 

free spirit...unfortunately, as i mentioned before, any sort of headgear (aside from a wig) is almost undoubtedly out of the question, since this will most likely take place in a church...

 

ah the old dont call us we will call you crap. I live my life around that and it bugs the hell out of me, only thing you can do is Call them and keep asking but dont make yourself seem desperate.

 

oh...forgot to mention...they did call back...

now im takin a day or so to think about it...as much as i wanna jump ship im not sure im gonna

comparison:
current job ----------------- job offer
steady paycheck ----- paycheck based on commission, chance to make more or less
health benefits (medical and dental) ----------- no health benefits for min of 6 months
crappy schedule (mornings) ------ crappy schedule (less mornings, but less days off too)
no friends (at store alone) ------- possibility of making friends via fellow employees
wont let me dread ----------- will let me dread
hate this job ------------------------ no clue on how much i would like this one

 

id stick with the current,, you may hate it, but its steady work and a reliable income, which is important in this day & age

 

ya
i know
but seriously im having to fight myself to not just quit this job!

 

guess it depends on how much you want dreads
but commission based work kind of sucks

 

tbh, a steady job > hair..

im lucky in that my job is very relaxed about appearance [to a certain extent] and i only have to make sure my hair is tied back when im working

maybe stick with the crappy job until a better one comes along )that isnt commission based)

 

ya D that's prolly gonna be my plan...unfortunately

 

tell your bro your not cutting your hair or changing your plans for HIS wedding, he can uninvite you if he really cant stand the dreads but his plans shouldnt affect your plans like your plans shouldnt affect his
ask him woulds he delay or evben not get married so youre able to grow your dreads if he wont changhe his plans to suite you why should u be expected to change yours
the best ya can do is offer to tery to be as pressentable as possible
and ya certainly have enougfh to pull back in a pony tail a d that will be all u need to do to look just fine
ya dont even gotta trell him the truth that theres a 50% chance yoir dreads will outlast the marriage
just tellhim the dreads anfd the wedding are 2 seperatre things that hnave nothing to do with eachother
both are important for theyre own reasons and neither plan should be expected to change