Attraction to my friend please help

Hi, I'm not transexual or transgender, but I am bi. For the past, going on four years I've had the biggest crush on my friend, we'll call her Jen. Jen and I have had a ton of fun, from band to just hanging out. She's a year younger then me. After several months, I knew I liked her and I found out she was lesbian. I'd always known her as a tomboy but I didn't know about being les. After a while, because I was in denial about my own orientation, she started dating this girl Katie. They've been dating off and on for the past few years and just broke up for good this past winter, and it's permenant this time. Katie's done too many things to hurt Jen and she's tired of it. Well in the past year, Jen's revealed that she's transgender and in her first year of college, coming up, she's going change her name to "Jace" and start HRT and eventually when "he" gets enough money he will get surgery. I really like him, I have for a long time. However I come from a strict Christian background and go to a strict baptist college that forbids the students from practicing any type of homosexuality or else you're expelled. I haven't told him that I like him, and I don't know if I should or shouldn't period or wait til he starts HRT or gets surgery or tell him now. He doesn't deserve a relationship that he'd have to hide, which I'm sure I'd have to do *if* we dated now, even though his facebook has his new name of Jace and all his genders online say male. I'm just so confused and I don't know what to do.

 

May I ask how the school would find out?

 

does he go to the same school?

 

and does he know how you feel about him?

 

Well, I was just asked out by someone else so I'm not sure if this applies anymore, but I'll answer the questions anyways. 1) School profs keep up with our facebooks, esp since we're a small uni and most if not all my profs know me by name 2) No not the same school, and he won't be going to this school at all 3) As far as I know, no he doesn't know, but I haven't exactly been very subtle... so on that one, it's up in the air

 

hmm...


well, you could go out and no one would now your anythign but freinds, and handle your private matters at home and such, and you can always be close in public, just keep it discreet, i know you dont want a "secret" relationship, but it might be kind of hard, but if you can somehow get into another school (if thats ok with you) that wouldnt be oposed to homosexuality, though i understand you probly wont wana switch, so just throwin the idea out there. it pretty hard place your in :/

 

not that I don't *want* to switch... I can't switch. FAFSA screwed me out of any type of federal grants or scholarships so my parents are paying out of pocket. I have to go by their rules for what school I go to. It sucks but I have to. Plus it's not just me that is opposed to secrecy. He told me before with his last girlfriend that it killed him that he had to keep them secret cause of her parents.