Its gotten to that time of year again when i am reflecting back into the past. Looking over what i have done, who i have met, and who has had a great effect on me over the last few years. I also look back in heindsight and see how childish i have been at times... and parhaps how cold and heartless i have been.. or maybe see how i could have done things better... been a better person... a better friend. ... or maybe just been more fun. Done a few more drugs, been a bit more open to trying things... been less scared to jump.... less scared to roll that hill or climb that tree. Currently my mind is full of nothing.. and everything..... it topples over and spils onto my lap and i think maybe i should clear this all up, start again. anyway thats not what i was talking about... i was talkign about change. i look back and i see how i have changed... and thats sad... and cool.... ..then i look back and see how others have also change... andthats sadder... and cooler. Sad that so many people i have been so close to in the past are now not so close.... be them friends, lovers, family people have a tendancy to slip away. I worry. About them. Yet im happy they have a new life... im happy people move on ... Ive spent the last month living in a new place... new people new scenery... its all change here!! .... and my mind wont shut up. Its constantly working ..... even when i sleep.... and it wears me out so much... what do you do when your brain tires you out? heres a few questions to all of you. when change hits you, not matter how much you may love change, when it hits you and begins to drive you crazy... what keeps you smiling? Whats all of your dreams... what did you want to do most as a kid? Why have you not done it yet?
Those who meant to stay together, grow apart or close to you will and do .. but don't worry too much about the future in that respect or you will miss out on the people who need you now. Its important that we question ourselves.
I'm living the dream! im an archaeology student, and i have a nice other half. but its not that simple is it? nooooooooooooooooooooooooo! im not living the dream - i work too hard at uni and never go out so im not making friends. im stuck between two people who i love and pretty soon its going to end in tears. im living at home with the animals and its driving me slowly nuts AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH
i'm too slightly going nutty....i feel so isolated, though i'm with people. got so much to do and so little energy... ah man, life is crazyyyy
* When my brain tires me out... I tend to either: - Lie back and listen to music - Meditate - Go for a walk on my own - Go out to meet friends and do something sillie such as some sort of intoxicant or some sort of crazee act. hehe - spend time with animals * When change hits me and it is so, so difficult - the simple things in life keep me happee. Things such as watching a plastic spoon spinning around in a swirl of tea, or dancing to tina turner with a friend, or watching crows feeding each other... Stuff like that... * As a kid i wanted to help all the animals in the world * my dreams are to help as many animals and people in the world as humanly possible * I "haven't done it yet" because for that particular dream, it's not something that you achieve at the end of the tunnel, it is travelling through the tunnel that is the achievement. Therefore i haven't 'done it yet', but i've already started doing it. Blegh, doing two assignments - "Environmental Interpretation" and "Animal Nursing". Sometimes one just has to procrastinate! Love, Sunshine Lily xxx
Better than writing anthropology essays on tribal rights of passage that involve young boys swallowing semen....
ahhh, you'll of done more good than bad, so look on the bright side of life! or do you want me to start doing cute sig pics again? *grins evily...or attempts to!* seriously though, think back on all the good times, and smile! as for your questions; insanity, archeology, dreams change short n sweet take care, and i hope to speak to you soon, as i have msn back!!! and internet and such!!!!!!!!!!
