My boyfriend is a soldier and I get to talk to him every other day or so... That would be okay for me (we've been making it for 6 months) but the last few times we've talked somehow it's turned into this petty arguing. I'm not a fighter, but if you push me enough then I fight back. I keep telling him that we should enjoy what little time that we have to talk and we should be telling each other we love each other. We should leave the conversation feeling happy not upset. Everytime I talk to him I end up so frustrated. I know he's going through a lot, but so am I... he just seems to have all this hostility and for some reason he's directing it all at me. He's just pushing me away. I love him so much and we've made it half-way through this, but it's getting so hard. I wish there was something I could do to make things different. Then again, I'm starting to feel like it's all in vain. What am I really waiting for?
if hes just a boyfriend and you aren't happy with him, theres nothing you can really do but ignore his calls or whatever and see how you feel or to just break up with him or something and find someone else. i'm sure he has loads of fuckin' hostility if hes out in a war zone somewhere, however he does not have the right to take it out on you.
I just keep thinking of when he gets home how amazing it should be. He's such a beautiful person. I know it's changing him to be over there... I'm kinda scared of what direction that may be though. I don't wanna give up on him. I just want us to be happy. It's stressful enough being apart... I just don't understand how he could so angry because I lost his copy of twilight. It may be justified to him, but good lord! I can buy him another for like $15! It seems really ridiculous to me. We wasted an entire day of conversation (which is only like 30 minutes) on a stupid fucking book.
Hi, I can only imagine what the two of you are going through. It's tough when a military man has to be away from home. It must be 1000 times worse when it's war related. Your b/f must be going through a bad time. Whether he's in Iraq or Afghanistan, both are war zones. Both places harbor people who don't like America and would like nothing better than to kill us. This whole deal is probably weighing heavily on him now. He may have seen things or participated in things he is holding inside of him. I'm sure he cares about you. It's just that being away in a war zone changes people. It's not his fault. It just happens. Something is causing him to be angry. You stated everything was fine, but recently things have soured. He's probably just fed up with being over there and wants nothing more than to be home with you. If you truly love him and care about him, then you do have to see things through. He may come back and not be the person you once knew. He may come back and still be that guy. I wouldn't just consider ending your realtionship while he is 10,000 miles away because the last few phone calls haven't gone to your liking. That would be taking the easy way out. If things go deeper than your writing here, then that's your call. I'm only responding to you based on what you've written. I can see why so many military marriages and relationships fail these days. There's so much physical, mental and emotional sacrifices taking place. Sometimes it's just too much and time to cut losses and move on. I know I rambled on but hopefully some of it made some sense to you. You seem like a nice girl who just needs a shoulder to lean on right now. Best of luck.
no he doesn't but don't just abandon the poor guy shit he's over there risking his life then his old lady shits on him, that's fucked up
it would be pretty crushing to get that call but maybe this guy needs a wake-up call to get his priorities straight. fighting over a lost book? you don't have to break up with him just end the call if it turns ugly. only do it if you can be firm and not give in unless the fighting/anger stop immediately. if you don't stand your ground, it won't work and probably just make things worse. best of luck.
I would never just call him and break up with him over some petty bullshit. I'm just so frustrated. In fact, I couldn't call him if I wanted to. My life consists of waiting for him to call (whenever it may be). I know what he's over there for. He doesn't tell me everything by any means, but I know enough that it scares the shit out of me. I have my family and friends, which is more than he can say, but I still feel so alone. He knows this and I should be the last person that he wants to be an ass to. It's 4 more months until I see him. I want to wait. I just don't want to get hurt in the process. I guess I just needed to vent. My family doesn't support my being with him so the last thing they wanna hear is me complain.
:grouphug: I wish you the best no matter how things turn out and you can always hit me up if you need to vent.
Well one thing I think you should look at is. Everyone takes shit out on people. MOST OF THE TIME we take shit out on the ones we love, Because we know that no matter what! They will still be there and will still love you even if you are taking shit out on them.
I know he loves me... he's just being way too bitchy. Since I posted this, I haven't even heard from him. It really just sucks. I need a little positive reinforcement from him. The worst part is that we don't even get to have make-up sex. It's all I can think about. I'm a 22 year old woman. I need a little loving and it's making me a little crazy. I am a little drunk so that makes it worse, but c'mon! I would much perfer to make love not war.
"I didn't watch my buddies die face down in the muck just to call you and hear about how you lost my favorite book!" Anyway, try bringing up some more pleasant stuff on the phone? He is probably lonely, pissed, scared, anxious and I can't even imagine what else...
