What Do You Really Think Of Mr. Nice Guy

Come on, you know nice guy are the coolest.:sunglasse

 

I have caught myself being like this. It's not deliberate, it's just after the last couple of girls I have found myself just being an ass hole sometimes, or making some smart ass statement from time to time. I wish I wasn't like that, I guess I'm still a little fucked up in the head.

It's just like Richard Kuklinski said, nice guys really do finish last. :$

 

It seems that there are two kinds of "nice guys," and they may appear very similar upon first glance. Kinda like how there were two categories in the post that began this thread.

First, there are the real nice guys. They're genuinely amazing people. Absolutely wonderful guys. They might feel underappriciated at times, but they're great. They radiate an inner beauty.

The second kind appear to be nice guys at first, but are actually desparate creeps. As in part "b" of the original choice... "nervous, insecure," particularly. These are the guys that you talk to a couple times in passing, and then they become desparately in need of your attention. It starts out seemingly nice. They might trick you into spending time with them, for example, but then they become desparately in need of your attention. They try and start a conversation with you, but then they become creepy when you're trying to walk away when the talk dies. One day you make the mistake of asking him to borrow a lighter before class/work, and without saying another word, he assumes that you're the best of friends (generally before you finished that proverbial cigarette which you borrowed his lighter for). Suddenly, he's sitting next to you in class and glues himself to your side like a sick idiot. He might trade all his shifts at work so he can work when you do. The difference between this guy and the real nice guy is that he has no sense of self... or if he does have one, he destroies it, so that he can be "closer" to you. He's weasely and manipulative. I don't really know how to phrase this accurately without talking about examples from my personal experience.

The second quote in the original topic was:

"Until a woman, comes to this conclusion on her own, all nice-guys should have the power to put her under a spell to marry them......"

That's the type-b kind of guy. He wants to have power over someone else. He wants to control him/her and turn him/her into a possession, or a trophy. Kinda like a "bad boy" in sheep's clothing. He's not a real nice guy... he just fakes it at first. The same can be said for women, especially the kind who try to perpetuate a "sweet and innocent" image, but then call you eighty million times if you're not home to answer the phone (but then you come home to an endless string of messages where the caller just hangs up without leaving a message).

* I appologize if this font shows up as some unruly size.. this text box is being unusually difficult at the moment.

 

Thanks for your responce to my thread, and taking the time to type all of this, it makes a lot a good sense, I understood what you said just fine.

It's very true, there are a lot of people out there, wearing sheep's clothing.

 

im kinda overly-nice when it comes to relationships, so ive realized being a nice guy sucks, lol. out of all 5 relationships ive had i have been the one dumped and REALLY hurt in all of them, haha.


lyrics of my life:
and the truth,
is that you could slit my throat,
and with my one last gasping breath,
i'd appologize for bleeding on your shirt.

 

I have run into the problem of being too nice to girls and "friends," to the point of getting walked on and taken advantage of some times. I have a lot of money, and I am quick to loan it with out expectation of repayment, which is fine, but some of my ex friends would borrow money, then it was like, help me with this, and this, and this, and when it comes time that I need them around, they are strangely absent. I am trying to get better about that. Regarding women though, I am 100% nice guy no matter what, a hopeless romantic, and a little clingy, but I know why, I never have had a steady female figure in my life, no even my mother. It was always me and my dad and his ex wife of the week. And all of my relationships ended with me being lefdt for supposedly no reason out of the blue, which makes it difficult for me to get attached and fall in love, but when I do I fall hard. Like my recent ex, I went through hell for her, and still consider myself a suitor in waiting of sorts, but our relationship went from great and gonna get married eventually to her not having feelings for me anymore and wanting to be without companion for a while. We are gonna try to be friends but I doubt it will work. She is undeniably attracted to me and loves me, but is afraid to feel it right now I think b/c she thinks she doesn't want a boyfriend, or more specifically, commitment of any sort. So I am afraid we will drift apart and I will never get her back, and I still want to marry her!

 

Been with Nice Guys and Bad Boys, and I'm now extremely happy with the nicest guy on the planet.

Nice does not have to equal boring!

Admittedly, some guys are nice because they are soo incredibly dull that they would never do anything to make them even remotely bad! But, the geniune Nice Guys have it all.... they are fun, great to be with and treat you well. Bad Boys might be kinda exciting sometimes, but you can only take so much of being treated like crap!!!


*steps off soapbox*

 

This. You girls only want nice guys when you've just been dumped, because you can guarantee that, when the time comes, he will beg you not to leave him, not the other way around.

 

Does this guy have a point, I think he might. Hey ladies what do you think? :H

 

This could be me, except i do not force myself to people, i'm so sensitive to people when they look they are unconfortable and look like they want to get away that i just see myself avoiding people, i just find myself affraid of rejection. I guess i really have no sense of self...

 

Dam! don't be so hard on yourself guy.

 

Definitely A. And my bf is just that! I am quite lucky.

 

I was with your type b for 5 years...those types are definitley not nice guys

 

not true my ex started off being the nicest guy on the planet I mean I was completley swept off my feet and even during the last months of our relationship he was incredibly attentive but with that attentiveness came a lot of jealousy and a lot of anger and questioning about where I was and who I was with all the time and I would find myself lying even if I didn't do naything just because he blew up over me talking to another guy and I dumped him because he was too possesive. I want a nice guy because I don't want to have to be the dumper in the future I want someone who won't change on me-not because I don't want to be dumped.

 

you're probably asking yourselves, where can i find these type A nice guys?

i suggest anywhere computer nerds can be located. (shameless plug for self and friends)

you'll have to approach them, as we all have the idea "girls aren't interested"

pretty cool "Ode To Nice Guys"

 

This topic really gets to me. I suppose because I'm deathly afraid of being that guy who is too attached. Anyway, as someone who was once kind of like that (maybe... I don't always have such a good sense of how I'm coming off), I think the best thing you could do for these guys is tell them exactly why you don't want to see them... because sometimes it's simply the case that they don't know how they're coming off, and would gladly change if they knew how! Usually, people are just looking for answers, and when they have them, it really helps them figure out both themselves and other people!

I mean, I think now I realize that before I didn't know how to approach a real relationship or even what I wanted or what it meant when I said I wanted to be a good person within the relationship... I think these things take lots of time and experience and I just didn't have that.

But now I guess I've had some really lasting friendships with girls as well as some really horrible one-night-stand type 'things', which I wouldn't call relationships or encounters or anything because they feel horrible and sad and make me feel sorry for myself as well as the other person, and then there was the worry of STDs and whether or not I was turning into one of those horrible one-night-stand kind of people... all in all, not worth it. Also, I know now that another person is supposed to be a lot more than just a consistent and reliable source of sex.

 

i think it depend son the time of the month for women. a study (which i wish i had a link for) would show images of men to women throughout various stages of their cycles. women who were ovulating and most fertile liked the bad boy look, more muscles, more 'masculine' kind of guys. women who were on their periods and in the non fertile stages prefered the more nurtuting look, skinnier guys with less 'masculine' appearances. the people conducting the study speculated it was because women want to be impregnated by the more masculine genes, but wanted the more nuturing guys to be the ones to help her look after the baby

 

Most Women marry the nice guy who is secure and safe and must have looks below them. While the secure nice guy is at work the wives are trying to figure out who they really are in life. Most are cheating and fucking the bad boys and rocking the Mommy van behind the mall.
The problem is most men don't know how to be the nice guy and the bad boy and when to be them.
It's very much like having sex-fucking or making love. All are different and in a perfect world we do them all in the same night.

 

anyone who is saying they like a nice guy over a bad boy is LYING

 

I'm engaged to a nice guy. I love him to bits and would't change anything about him....Apart from the annoying habit of grinding his teeth when he's watching tv, that can go. He's kind, sensitive, doesn't care that i spent exhorbitant amounts of money on my horses, great in bed, great looking and i know he loves me. Why would i want someone who treats me badly, goes out every night, has no financial security and who i can't trust? I've been there. It's fun for a while, then your self worth plummets and it starts to suck bigtime.