ima bitch

It sucks to make a mistake. We have all done something we are ashamed of afterwards and it sucks to have to look yourself in the mirror, knowing you did something you wish you hadn't.

Far as I see it, you have two choices. You don't tell him. You hope he doesn't find out. You live with the guilt of having to lie to him. You keep the secret which possibly could put distance between the two of you. You hope that it never comes out, even in a moment of drunken stupor(sometimes things are revealed then that we NEVER would have told otherwise) This choice could lead to much more devasting effects if he ever found out.

Or you face him and let him know what you did. If you both love one another as much as you think you do, you might be able to get through this. Or you might not...but then you do not need to live with the guilt, the lies and the paranoia that he would find out.

Also you give him an opportunity to show you what he really is about. You can see how he deals with the situation and it might open up 'free love' for the two of you.

Wouldn't it be better for him to find out from you then someone else?

But whatever your choice, good luck. I've always HATED having to admit to someone that I have hurt them. I've kept it from people and then it bit me in the ass, big time.

 

thanks for the advise marie
i think ill give myself some more days to think it over and see what happens in the meantime, then i guess ill tell him and leave him do whatever he finds best to.

 

Your welcome. My advice is not always popular, so I often feel reluctant giving it.

But I think it will help you grow as a person, will help your relationship show its true colors and put everything in the open.

I bet you have a knot in your stomach?

 

If I was you I wouldn't say anything cause your boyfriend is going to be fuckin devistated .Whats the point in breakin his heart if you've learned your lesson ? thats a mistake we all have to make .Even if he forgives you he'll never trust you again so just let sleeping dogs lie and move on for now ,if the guilt is as a bad in a months time then tell him but be careful cause he'll no something is wrong the min that he sees ya

 

yeas i do have a knot in the stomach
but i dont feel mature enough i dont feel strong and independent woman, i feel like a little girl that desn`t really know what she wants and shes always making stupid mistackes.
anyway i guess the more adrenalin the better!

the bad thing here is i have some feelings toward that other guy i belive
i feel uneasy and my hands feel all shaky and all that kids stuff happen to me when he is around. i havent felt that way for ages
and thats where we come to the point that i really have no idea what i want and what to do, so thats why im not going to tell anything to him for now

 

yeah, it does sound like you have to figure things out.

Life ain't easy and relationships are even harder, me thinks. How long have you been with your fellow?

 

2 years next month exactly

 

shh i just cant understand why should be people jealous and controling
why cant we all love eachother and make a big orgy tysahah

 

do you think asking him for a break to figure things out would help you guys??

 

because people are insecure and codependent. we need to know we can control someone. its sad and something we need to overcome.

 

In order to be in a real relationship you have to break a heart and have your own broken so that you understand both sides .we all have to deal with a sisuation like this at some stage so dont hate yourself just float along and say nothing untill you hear more.

 

The best comment here LOL

But of the lots of girls , 1 guy variety , preferably

 

no no break, just i will sleep alone in my place tonight
we usualy always sleep together , so thats gonna be the break

 

what time is it your way?

 

its 5.33 pm here right now and its pretty dark and freezing outside
feels like a dracula movie, i just need to light some candles and pretend the wine is blood

 

Ahhh....vampire girl

Did you tell him you aren't coming over this evening?

 

no, but i havent been in his place for 3 days now, i have been out of the town and he was with some frineds from the university all night
but if he want to come to me i wont stop him, i think its offencive not to let him come

 

aw, sweety. what a pickle. i really don't think you're ready for a long term monogamous relationship, just by your statements here. not that you don't love your boyfriend, it's just that, you're young and tempted. i wouldn't beat myself up TOO MUCH over it, though you're going to, anyway. it really sucks hurting someone you love. i've had nightmares about it. it's a horrible feeling.

but in fairness to your boyfriend, i would say be honest about it. if you respect him, love him, you will let him choose to forgive or not.

but it's your life and your decisions. (((hugs))))

 

gosh KC...that was really sweet

 

thanks KC that definately made me feel way better, thanks alot
u got have the force with you



btw thanks really to everybody here for the opinions guys, i really feel better after this thread :cheers2: