I am new here and feel very much at home on the site. I am 57 years old, married and looking for a discreet male playmate - trouble is, I seem to be the only guy on the planet who wants a guy who wants to be more then just a quick suck or fuck. Is it that difficult to find another married or single guy who wants to be friends as well as bed partners? I mean, I have been looking for over a year now for a guy who wants to have a friend with whom he can do non sexual things as well as someone who wants to have someone with whom he can really just be himself. The fear of disease is why I do not mess around outside my marriage.. There is no shortage of opportunities if all a guy wants is a blow job or a quickie.. but again, I fear disease as I love my wife dearly and have no desire at all to pass something onto her. I have had some bi experiences in my lifetime and liked them and now want more.. but what is it about guys that they want to play the field? Or am I just old fashioned?I placed some ads on line but all I get are guys who are unkempt, dirty, weird or just play games. I am not into the bar scene - so gay bars are out of the question. I guess what I am asking is how do I find a sensible, sincere guy who just wants one guy to play with on an ongoing basis? Any suggestions will be appreciated.
Does your wife know about this? Because sounds like you want some kind of relationship and that would be more threatening to a marriage than that quickie with a guy who won't even remember your name in a couple days. (I'm embarrassed when I see 'em and don't know their names). And, a lot of guys who would commit to a friendship with a bi guy may want more of a commitment from you - which brings us back to the wife and marriage. So, need to know are you able to have an open marriage? Otherwise you are on the "down-low" and that sounds dreadful doesn't it?
My wife and I were into swinging for a year or so with one other couple mostly - and there was a lot of same sex touching with things going a bit further each time we got together and we did talk about it. We broke things off with that couple and saw one other couple and I went down on him and enjoyed it. My wife knows that I have these desires - she just doesn't know that they have become so pressing. I told her that I wanted to experience sex with abother guy several years before we tried the swinging scene and when we were seeking a couple to party with, our ad clearly stated that I was bi curious. As I said in my original post, I am not into "hooking up" with another guy for a quickie. I guess that I am just expecting too much but I will keep looking.
Don't do it unless your wife knows clearly what you plan on doing. It would be a real loss if your marriage was ruined due to lack of self control on your part.
If you are weird then so am I! I can identify with what you are saying. In the early 70s my wife and I had a playmate that we both enjoyed being with. He was a few years younger than us. He and my wife like to have sex togather and I enjoyed watching. He and I would also have sex togather. I enjoyed that too. He had to move too far away to continue the relationship. I would like to meet another couple that was into getting it on togather. I would want all of us to commit to each other. I do worry about STDs, so I think it would be best to keep it among the the four (Two couples). It's just a pipe dream I think. I have no idea where to look, or how to get something like that started. I am also not sure my wife would be into it now. I know she would have to like the other couple a lot to agree if she was willing. It's alright though. My wife and I have real good sex togather, and I am happy about that. And yes she know that I am bi and like to look at guys as will as girls and know I have fantasies about having sex with guys. <(^o^)>
I have to agree with you about the disease aspect of this lifestyle. The stuff that is out there these days is pretty scary and some of the diseases don't manifest themselves for long periods of time which pretty much means that any partner out there is a risk. As for finding another couple with whom to play, don't give up. We found our playmates through a local contacts magazine ad that we placed. We stated in the ad that I was bi curious and my wfe could be with the right person and we were deluged with ads from single guys. I swear that some of these people can't read because we clearly stated that we wanted a couple - not a single guy. At any rate, my wife and I have discussed perhaps trying to find another couple to have an exclusive "special" friendship with although she is having some health challenges these days so it likely wont happen. So, I have been looking for one guy with whom to play on an ongoing basis. So far, I have one possibility - the rest just want to blow their load and run. Well, that is not my way. I am determined to keep looking and if I score, then that would be great. If not, then I am not compromising my ideals and casual one night stands are out of the question. So yes, you are right - maybe it is just a pipe dream for the both f us. I sure do miss the taste, touch and feel of another guy though....
