Sorry this couldn't be more meaningful A brilliant mind Oh I wish I had To fade Like lilacs. Petals to dust. Racing thoughts invade Hatred breeds in numbers, and I've had enough. Thoughts that are nonsensical Intrude, leaving me crippled, with worry. Ranting, seething inside, I wish to relax, to hide. To seclude myself as a hermit might. I wrote that the other night because I was contemplating the mind numbing disorder. But I think something I wrote while I was really crazy better describes it: Insanity spawns in the page of a book Insanity that caused my random spatterings, of words. Like tools I use to enshrine a page. Entities of births throughout the ages. Random self hatred ripping up pages. Books upon books missing and gone The time slipped away... And somehow I was lost surrounded, and writing. Frightening. Fretting away at impossible situations.... To those that made it impossible, human violations. Meh what can I say I was nuts. I've been feeling rather bad lately, worrying that I'm going insane.... again. I think the stress is getting to me, so I write, read, anything that takes my mind off it. I've been reading up on psychology hoping that will hold some clues as what Schizophrenia is, found nothing yet. Well I gotta jet... Thanks for listening to me rant.
My symptoms are auditory hallucinations ( I was just hearing voices this morning after I took my medication) and paranoia, and my aunt has Schizophrenia. That's basically it.
You're going to need professional help. This isn't something you can self medicate, though many will try this route first. The fact you have it in your family makes it likely that its in your gene pool. There are some excellent medications out now. It will take some trial and error to find what works for you. Make sure that you're completely honest with your doctor about symptoms. Don't be afraid to get a second opinion either. Doctors are only human and do make mistakes. Most people can live ordinary lives with their illness, but you will likely have to remain on medication the rest of your life. You should avoid illegal drugs as this is known to make things worse. Good luck to you. x
xenon has given excellent advise, Schizophrenia is a lifetime disorder which requires regular maintanence. While it can't be explained exactly, it can be decribed by its symptoms. Good, open , honest dialog with your shrink will make a world of difference. It falls outta the sky on people , it's not something you did. As xenon said, it follows family lines...but that does always mean it will affect you like it did your aunt. Take care of yourself and live well.
Well I have professional help in that I see a psychiatrist every month and a counselor every two weeks. My aunt well that's another story, she has it bad but it's not just that. I'm on meds but self medicated before. There was a doctor who was studying niacin as a cure for schizophrenia so I took that for a while and it worked. Wish I had some now. I've been contemplating staying away from the coffee for a while but I kinda like my caffiene. I'm on Risperdal and Abilify and it seems to work better than the Zyprexa I was on, which didn't work at all. Atleast the delusions are gone, they really got to me.
You are a shaman trapped in industrial capitalist society. I have a friend who sees shit; he was on meds for a while, then stopped. He still sees a lot of weird shit, less than when he started experiencing symptoms; but he isn't disturbed by them. No one who knows him can tell he experiences any symptoms. Also, in Deleuze and Guattari's "Capitalism and Schizophrenia" they argue that because of how people who interpret their world in ways that are most commonly referred to as schizophrenia, they subvert capitalism. Capitalism functions by hi-jacking our desires, which are rooted in representations of cultural values. Because schizophrenic interpretations functions so far outside of these value-representations, included among them elements of gender and race constructs. They advocate functional schizophrenic interpretation as an ideal interpretive framework. Also, don't worry too much about sense. Sense is logic-normative; and that conceptual-semantic mode of intelligence will only show us an ersatz representation of transcendental truth. It's somewhat less deceptive than cultural representations, but is not nearly as wonderful as has been suggested by our culture's fetish of 'rationality'; it's important to note that rationality is most often used in favor of arguing some bias along the rules of sense. The above authors have similar opinions of non-sense as schizophrenic-type interpretation. I will also say that by voicing non-sense, you force others around you to consider possibilities that are normally hidden from their rational mind as well as introducing greater memetic/epistemic/grammatic/logical entropy into the idea population, thereby accelerating the evolution of humanity (the abstraction rather than the DNA). In short, you accelerate the Darwinistic evolution of humanity understood as an organic body strung together by ideas and cultural representations by introducing non(ordinary)sense into the local cultural-ideological (and whether directly related to forms of social organization or not, most forms of sense or logic are ideological in nature) milieu. I hope I can provide some lightness to the 's' word. Your not deficient in any way. Also, while I assume you probably are already familiar with the science behind your psychiatric treatment, I would like to point out that most anti-psychotics (except Depakote - valproic acid; stay away from that) inhibit synthesis and use of dopamine. Dopamine and serotonin need to stay balanced, so increasing serotonin levels can ameliorate some schizophrenic-type symptoms. This can be done with or without SSRI's. You can get 5-hydroxytryptophan (direct precursor to serotonin) supplements prescribed or L-Tryptophan over the counter, both of which are dietary supplements that increase serotonin synthesis. I recommend watching https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEglHjd_gUQ P.S. I'm 18. There's a good chance I will encounter more schizophrenic-type symptoms in my own life as I become older. Also, out of curiosity, would you say that you have demonstrated above-average intelligence? And what do you experience off of medications?
on the schiz, thanks for the insight into whats going on. im interested in schizophrenia as my brother has it. stress deffo makes his symptoms worse. good luck bro' i hope everything works out for you.
omega3 (the DHA one...which is mostly from fish oil) is shown to be very successful for psychosis. The article I read said it helped to get the dark areas of the brain that scziophrenics have going again. I have drug induced manic bipolar which turns into psychotic episodes. Off the illicit drugs now, and trying to lead a healthy life but I still hear the odd thing and feel detached, especially when I'm emotional. I really feel for you having it hereditarly, why I brought it upon myself I don't want to dwindle upon.
as a schizophrenic, i'd like to humorise this situation by saying that the next time my "delusions of grandeur" take hold of me, i will healthily (hopefully) consider myself the next step in evolution -- a prophet, even! loved that tho. good advice (y)
