I don't know how to get over being cheated on

It's making me really sick and I'd like know how to fucking get over it. I can't stop thinking about how my ex could do that to me, with a girl who called herself my friend who would never betray me. I can't get over what the two of them did to me. I mean her she's a manipulative liar whore so.. okay.. but how could she fuck my ex in our room in our bed with all pictures of us around - after telling me she'd never ever betray me - and after she had done it she dared tell me she knew for a fact he never cheated - it just makes me SICK.. and how could HE just fuck someone else.. it makes me sick to just imagine them together, it's disgusting, to just think about how it started and how it ended.

I wish I had amnesia.

 

just stop talking to both of them all together. try to find another guy but dont start having trust issues because not everyone is a liar. i was assume that it was more of your so called friends fault because thats how it usually happens, she probably came onto him and he didnt resist her. idk how to tell u how to get over it but theres my 2 cents

 

Cut them both out. I have never really gotten over being cheated on either, and lord knows that it happened more then once. As sad as it sounds it tends to be something that you carry with you.

 

Well it happened over 2 years ago.. only I found out it like 2 months ago.. and I have stopped talking to her - even before that happened in fact - then we started talking again for like a week a couple months later - then I cut her off again

 

so how long were you with the guy?

 

my god i am so sorry.

i know just how you feel.. and it does make you sick. it makes you want to cry until you cant breath. but all you can really do is remember the person you were before this happened. you need to regain your self esteem, because if you dont you will push people away that really want to get to know you.

i wish i could take my own advice.

 

4 and a half years

 

Try 11 years. Any help will help me. We have only been broke up for alittle over 8 months But we still talk to each other. He broke up with me But it seem like when I went out with some friends one night and stayed out late and didn't talk to him while I was out with them. He changed that night. He came over to my house. I think it was to see who I was with. But I need help to. He wants to work things Out. But I still have not forgive him. So I just keep imaging it. My friends say you need time without him in my life. PLEASE HELP.

 

Take care yourself. For those liars, they are nothing.

 

ive never been cheated on but my boyfriend has been. and when i found out his ex girlfriend cheated on him, i couldnt stop thinking of how someone would ever want to hurt him. i hate her for it, and will probably always. im the type of person that doesnt forget about things easily, but someone will knock you off your feet, and you will never think about it again. i love him so much, that i know my love for him is enough to never make him feel like i would do that. but seriously, your a very smart and interting person, you will find someone that will love you for that and never hurt you, like me towards my boyfriend

 

I don't have any advice I just wanted to say I'm sorry and I hope many positive things come into your life and you heal quickly.

 

Penny, the way to stop having it effect you is by not letting their misdeeds haunt your every thought. Find something else to fill your mind with...music, friends, hell the current state of the world is a good thing to think about...anything but the two losers who lied to you. The whole thing happened two years ago...even if you found out about it a couple of months ago, this guy was already your ex, right? So why do you care now? He was a loser, she (your ex friend) is a loser, forget about both of them and move on with your life.


As for asswoman, I can't really even understand what you are saying...it is too confused to make sense of. What it sounded like was, you broke up with a man who you were with for 11 years 8 months ago? Then when you are unavailable for him to contact he acts like he wants to get back together? But he cheated on you, then broke up with you, but now he wants back in? I'd tell him that ship sailed a long time ago and he should go find someone else to screw with. Most people won't change behavior over night (it can happen but is very, very rare) and most people change their tune just long enough to get what they want. Decide what you want, then tell him what you want. If you don't know what you want, don't have any contact with him until you decide (tell him to not contact you until you contact him--otherwise he'll just hound you for an answer.)

Puss

 

Woah.that fucking sucks. I'm not sure how I would deal with it either, if I still cared about either of them anyways... I think once you're over them, then the feeling fades.

 

that is a horrible, horrible thing that happened to you. it can be crushing if you let it. your friend you need to cut loose and NEVER TALK TO AGAIN. people treat you how you let them. it'll be hard, but the pain will only get better if you cut these people out of your life.

people do stupid, awful things to each other. out of malice or just plain thoughtlessness.

you did not deserve what happened, and your friend is a big skanky hoe! your ex is a fuckin dumbtard! they deserve each other.

 

You forgot to say *peace* after this

 

i don't know how either. and my heart hurts every day because i don't know how.

 

After being cheated on it, and it hurting for a LONG time I realized that the only way that I could get past it is to ask myself why it still bugged me. It bugged me because he lied, and I didn't. It bugged me because he cheated on me, and I would have never cheated on him. It bugged me because he did what was in his character basically. So, now I honestly don't care about what he did anymore. It was not a reflection of any shortcomings in me, but an honest reflection of who he was. I think that was the key for me, realizing that I had nothing to do with it. It was just him being him.....

As you get older you realize that if something isn't enhancing your life, the best course of action is to just get rid of it. So, let it go..chalk it up to a life lesson...and move on. Yes, it hurt like hell and still does based on your post. Yes, it sucked. No, you didn't deserve it. And those are all reasons to let it go. Sometimes when caught in the past you miss out on the future. Why deprive yourself? You are the only person this is still hurting...screw em both and get on with your life. You really want to piss them off? Be happy! Works every time.

I am in no way minimizing your pain, because I know all to well how it feels to be cheated on. Few things hurt more...but....you cannot continue to poison yourself emotionally for something that THEY did.

 

whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat

 

I think the only way to get over it is to get out there and have some fun.
Let yourself go a little go out as much as possible and just try to stay on the bright side.
when your in tune with being happy good things find you
so just go and act as if nothing is going on and dont worry
It will be easy luck and free

 

Imagine you purchased a painting by a famous artist, and one day the painting falls from the wall and is damaged, and upon taking it for restoration, you find out (horror of horrors) that the painting is a fake...


Well in fact, you haven't lost what you thought you had lost at all.

Would you rather still be with a dishonest partner and a lying friend? You've seen their true material. Now you can hold it against them, fume and drive yourself halfway bonkers trying to work out an explanation, or you can accept that a house built on sand was never going to last, and you're lucky to have found out now rather than later.

Forgive them, because they are weak. They behaved according to their nature.
The only person harmed by bearing the resentment is you. No amount of anger will undo what was done.

In truth, you have lost nothing, the values on which you build your relationships are intact, so long as you continue to honour them.

Scars don't heal if you pick at them, so stop. No one else can do that for you.