I truly hate opiates. here is why

i ate an oxie 40 like an hour ago i feel nice.


i have self-control though.



kinda.

 

nah pm me. i got a good connect now but scott (the oxy neighbor who's like 55)... when i use needles.. i have him do it... he knows how to avoid air bubbles and he tells me what he thinks about my dope... he's hella cool. he used to get shit i WISH i could get. the heroin now SUCKS... so yeah though my connect now is decent.. it's not decent by his standards. it's ACCEPTABLE. the other shit was small and not good. this stuff is BARELY reputable but it's the best i get.
seriously pm me. im interested and have no clue really but if i can do it myself and have an opiate without doing the work.. ive seen people being shot n stuff when i went to cop. no joke. had "friends" steal my atm card.. all that. i HATE the dope game and want out but i dont wanna give up opiates.

anyways yeah the dope now... is dirty. i love it when i get a bag exactly the right stickyness n color of brown. i can eye it and see how dirty it is. the thing is i got bad shit before and shot it up... by a friend... i almost died. my friends had to put my socks on me... a hoodie.. take off hoodie.. bring t water.. a bucket to puke.. took me three hours to puke.. it was HELL. and that is what you get when you do heroin cause you NEVER know what you are getting that is why im glad my connect now is reputable and i trust him. he's actually a decent guy.

but yeah i was mad sick from dirty dope and i will NEVER forget. i COULD have died that day

 

duuude now i is jealous. wanna come share? peez. ill give you the best hug ever for even 20 mills

*cries*

i gotta work it soon but im not ready to yet. just straight chillen.

 

ps
kinda
i love that.
i kinda have self control. kinda.

walking the line is fun. play with danger. tease it and get the fuck out when you need to. tis fun and not for the weak but some of us CAN do it. shhh

 

Brother- I'm not too qualified to speak on many things, but unfortunately I am qualified when it comes to opiates (mainly dope)- Discovering its wonderful powers to take away both physical & mental pain while in s.e asia - I developed a habit shortly after returning home. Is not going to get into the whole frigging story, it reads like a bad drug movie> but after many yrs of chasin a high that I really couldn't get anymore- I wound up on a methadone program. That was 20 years ago, & Im still on that fucking juice everyday -
Your absolutely right- its a love / hate relationship. Opiates have a drawing power that is like no other.. You love the feeling, but you hate being a slave to it.
I don't use the dope anymore(just the m done) but once in awhile I feel like just walking off the clinic and go get a few nice bags- - but I know better.
Just be careful man- natural my ass - aint nothing natural about the sickness that shit brings on.
justmyhumbleadvise,
Jack

 

im a girl.
thank you for your for your post. ill get back to it actually but i mean THANKS...
i feel the tears. ill be careful but opiates are strong. you play with them u gamble. btw meth is the devil i know mad heads trying to get off dope fuckng sick as hell from meth. id suggest suboxone or one of its cousins. i dont even know why ppl still get meth. its disgusting. i know it hurts to go off opitaes but i had subutext or something (suboxone cousin) for a week in rehab and it was fairly painless. methadone pisses me the fuck off... ive seen ppl get WORSE via meth

it is the LAST thing i would suggest. horrible.

 

thanks sweet heart. i guess i think if i dont get sick (again) yet i feel mentally sick and depressed. i know it is serious but i cant stop. mental addiction again. i hate this but as soon as i cop again...peace. god help me.

 

woah woah woah step back everyone and take a look at the brilliant hypothesis.

 

ignores.
hi cate. you wanna stop fightint w/ me?

 

poppies, cate.

 

wink wink wink

 

I guess I am very fortunate in that I cannot have anything with an opium base to it due to severe allergic reactions....I stop breathing.
just from reading here , and from working with all the addicts at the methadone clinic out in cali , I know its a HORRIBLE addiction to deal with.
I use meditation to deal with pain.

 

how do you use meditation to deal with pain?

 

Thats very easy...you put yourself into as altered state , like in bio feed back..to where you are still aware of yourself , but you are disconnected from the pain...lots of ladies actually use it in childbirth.
Its almost like self hypnosis.

 

pain sucks most doctors ignore it to avoid law suits. that is when ppl often go to the streets.

i know first hand. i went to doc a few times for extreme pain but my street pharmacist is easier.

every time i use i have to use caution
omg
it is not easy
to dabble with opiates when u KNOW you have pain too AND love to go to heaven. not easy at all. that is why i ask for prayers n stuff. i can manage it ... i can deal with ANYTHING but this can become a monster that kills. keep me alive please


gooooood i gotta go cop

 

I know how to do that
I am in pain every day of my life and have been meditating since I was 5 years old (No I am not bragging I am just giving you some background info)
but meditation never helped me with pain.
it just helped me find the source of it.

despite all my meditation
I am still very much in pain.

 

since you were five years old? you must have had some pretty cool parents.

 

they forced me to do martial arts,
and the koreans forced me to meditate.

I'm grateful...... took me a long time to realize it, though.

 

Im so sorry , I wish I could give some sort of Great advice.
I learned how to do what I do when I lived on the commune , our doc there gave a demonstration where he was able to lower his blood pressure and pulse to the point of scarey...then be burned without giving any indication that he even felt it...he was hooked up to a blood pressure cuff and a stethascope , and monitored....and his body didnt even react to the burn stimulis.
Im no where near as good as he was , but , it helps.

 

jeez that's amazing.
I can lower my heart rate and blood pressure,
but damn......not to that extent.
that's beautiful thanks for sharing