I'm writing the account of my Summer and I got bored of writing in pose so I wrote it in the style of Sonya Sones. What do people think of the start? The train travels down the tracks “Hold your colours against the wall When they take everything away” I stare out the window, what was I doing. He’d asked me to stay, I’d agreed, of course I’d agreed. And now I was travelling towards him, towards lovely Thomas. And I was scared I was scared. Off at King’s Cross Down the stairs Buy a ticket, politely lie Metropolitan line To Baker Street And a tube to Amersham A phone call. Delightment Excitement ‘Thomas!’ ‘Where are you?’ ‘I’m on the tube to Amersham’ ‘I managed ta get the white star in’ ‘Oh good, see you soon!’ ‘see ya soon’ And out of London into unmarked territories Ones never before explored by me: Elena With my coloured hair And floating skirts And boots with rainbow laces And nose stud It was the start of my journey in more ways than one. I end up in Amersham Chavs everywhere and No bus for an hour So I phone Thomas And I wait. I sit on the bus that takes me from the town to the village It’s past nine and there are few on the bus Twinges of anticipation fill me Is it going to be worth the fuss? I've changed some names and I should really change some locations.
Your line format indicates you are trying to be poetic, but there's little in here that resembles a poem. I suggest you forget the poetry idea (if that's what you were thinking of) and re-write the piece as a short story. Not much would need to change. If it has to be a poem, you should put it in the poetry thread.
