How to cop weed...

Hey, everyone.

It's your favorite Undercover Cop.

Anyway, I saw a few people asking how to spot a dealer. I'm no expert, and this thread may've even been done before (gasp), but here are a few pointers. Be mindful that the technique varies from hood to hood, suburb to suburb. I encourage other buying experts to chip in their two cents, as well.

1. The easiest way to buy weed from a suspected drug dealer is to be HIGH AS FUCK when you actually meet them. Being high is perhaps the biggest proof that you are not a cop. Smell like weed, taste like weed, look like weed. BE THE WEED, my boy, and you will go far in your quest for the magical herb.

2. You shall not approach -the weedman-. -The weedman- must choose you. How? Once you have become the weed, you will become readily visible to your prospective dealer. I shall tell you a story of a dealer I once met.

I went into a gas station to buy a pack of Backwoodz (for the faunta leaf). The cashier says nothing to me. I go into the car, roll my very last little bit of weed, smoke it, and go back in the gas station. I'm in a fucking tug of war with gravity to keep my eyelids open. I speak kush. And I'm wearing kush cologne.

Y'understand?

I go back in the joint and the cashier says: "Damn, bro, you make me wanna get off work early!"

And the rest is history. We speak in code sometimes. The conversation wasn't the words. The conversation was the various cues that took place leading up to main man's comment. And just like that, I got a new connect.

So I would say, most importantly, the best way to spot (or be spotted) by a dealer is to become the weed.

And if you have no weed to morph into, buy obvious marijuana rolling paraphanalia (sp?) such as EZ Wider, Dutchmasters, eye drops, etc. Let these items communicate for you. Do it in front of the cashier, do it in front of the customers -- and someone's bound to spot you sooner or later.

Peace to the Brotherhood of Sun Possessors. I did this one for yall.

 

truth

 

Here in lies the problem with your logic though. If you are new to a city looking for bud and dont have any at the moment (thus the reason you are looking) How are you supposed to be stoned and smell like pot?

 

Read the rest.

I said: Even if you don't have weed, you can buy weed-related objects in front of people to send an S.O.S., mayday-mayday, I'm outta weed distress signal.

Peace.

 

I mean, obviously you wanna have weed.

But buying the associated objects outlined above lends you a better chance at gaining the dealer's confidence than outright asking him/her, unless, of course, you speak Ancient Tongue. Then you can walk up to anyone and ask.

 

Gotcha, I'm playing the part of pot right now if you know what I mean so I just focused heavily on the points related to being pot lol.

 

So your saying I should by pack of pape till someone notice me...Quite dumb if you ask me. And its also..a waste of money that could be use on some good green.

But I reckon that if you wear like tie-die shirt or Mj logos and shits, your more bound to be spoted by potential dealers.

 

I'll give my advice for being on a college campus. My campus is in the mountains in a fairly liberal area. The school is known for potheads. Everywhere you go you see dreads and huge beards around campus.

1.Smoke cigarettes. Do not smoke cigarettes just because you like them, smoke them to find a connection. 90% of the people I randomly meet are just smoking a cigarette outside the residence hall. I use to smoke half a pack a day but now I have cut down. I usually only smoke a cigarette at night and when I am outside looking for someone to hook me up.

2.It's easier if you wear the stereotypical clothing. Just be prepared to be profiled by cops.

3.College is a rather chill place. There's no real harm in asking people on campus. With people coming from many parts of the country I try to use pretty universal terms. I don't blatantly shout "MARIJUANA" or "CANNABIS SATIVA" but I try not to use terms like tree, buddha, etc.

4.Get to know the people on your floor if you live in a dorm. There will always be the same people coming back to the dorm at the same time every night after smoking.

 

Hey El,

I like the very Zen Marijuana attitude. I am a beliver in the ways of the bud as well. I get what you say and agree. I'll tell you why.

My buddy does not get the Zen factor of weed and the way people who smoke speak the same language. We were dry once, at least we almsot were. I was like we will find some let's smoke and he wanted to save it. So we decided to go to the movies and smoke in the lot before we went in. I heard some people playing their music over in the corner of the lot and I said to him, I bet these guys could hook us up. He was like, no way man, I could not just walk up on someone. Now keep in mind I am a very white guy in my late thirties. So we drive over to them and I pull up. We were already smoking so I puffed up in the car as we were going over. I roll down the window as a cloud puffs out of my car I tell the guys what a nice system they have and then I chat them up a little. Long story short I offer what little I have left to these young adults and then ask them if they know of anyone where we can get the hook up. They are like yeah man no problem. We exchange numbers and I tell him to give me a call when we can meet to buy.

I got some good stuff at a good price. You never know.

Zen.

 

God it sucks being a near 30 professional in a small southern town. The older I get, the harder it is for me to find weed, oh yeah, I used to live out West where weed was every where and no big deal, but now I'm back in the conservative south.

I've found that if you hang out in a bar long enough and know how to spot a dealer or smokers, chances are after they get to know that you're not a cop, they might help you out every now and again. But I've been out for weeks and don't have enough money to shower a bar tending weed dealer this tips, cause then I wouldn't be able to afford the bag. LAME.

But I must say, my weed-dar is great. I can spot a pothead, even an undercover pothead from miles away.

 

Weed-dar. Nice

 

I bet you wouldnt spot me.

 

i have to say, everything by the el is funny as hell. (ooh a rhyme.)

i agree, there are ways to spot a dealer/be spotted. i never saw a problem in approaching a dealer, but maybe it's because i am so weed.

and tell me more about this faunta leaf. is it just the purest tobacco leaf? i watched the youtube video and i thought you were gonna roll it up in the leaf, not crumble it up...nice joint anyhow.

 

That's some solid advice but at the same time making everything about yourself scream WEED is kind of bad for legal reasons..

 

i agree, i've found many dealers or people to smoke with by just smelling or being high.
idk what to say really if you don't have any weed theres always someone trying to smoke up around here.

 

i can't agree more with the el.
in my experience, just be yourself...
if you are yourself, and you are truly guided by the weed....
the right people will gravitate towards you
(not always the best)

 

The el...
Everything I have read that you have posted just sounds like some crazy prophecy or a poorly translated rushed story that can't get from your brain to your tongue fast enough... It's really entertaining. You're really entertaining. Thank you.

 

thats the fuckin truth where i lived in the tri-citties you could find weed at most taco trucks

 

the el is cool as hell.
if a pimp ever typed, that pimp is the el.
he types very well.

 

Haha I like your poetry