fuck i lost my wallet

i seriously looked all over my house for over 2 hours. i tore everything apart it looks like a cyclone hit this place. it looks like a warzone in here

i mean i looked everywhere if you ask me i looked there

it had my debit card in it and like 80 bucks cash money so i'm really fucking pissed

 

Did you look in your other pants?

 

i looked through all my pants.

 

why is it when you lose something its always in the last place you look?

 

Because if you knew where to look, then it wouldn't be lost!

 

take a deep breath, watch the following:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PnN_YpCDY4U

(7:50 on is what Im referencing, and it leads into)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejhQ2r_Pg6k&feature=related

then put everything away carefully, and relax with a bowl. it will come to you eventually. just think of the last place you had it, and reenact your movements.
I believe George Carlin can make you laugh in any situation. this is actually one of my favorite bits.

(and PS: I've looked everywhere is a false statement. )
"Well I've looked EVERYWHERE!"
"Well, apparently not. Goddamn thing is still gone isn't it?"


and GIVE ME A BALLOON!

 

because when you find it you stop fucking looking. its ALWAYS in the last place you look! I hate when people say that like its a revelation, its annoying.

 

haha i know, i was just joking

well who knows, maybe some people continue looking for something after they've found it

 

well, i KNOW some people are incredibly stupid, so probably. plus theres folks with Alzheimers. keep forgetting that you found it already. I hope I die before I get Alzheimers.

 

marijuana has been shown in studies to prevent alzeimers, so i think we're good

 

I think you should check your bed.

 

It really sucks to lose a wallet

 

maybey some1 stole it

 

its not in my room & i think my sister stole it

 

i wouldn't count on it.

 

then steal 80 bucks worth of her shit

 

Haha good call

 

that sucks.. bout two weeks ago i lost my wallet.. had about $100 and CCs and other contact shit.. sucks balls

 

my sister doesn't have 80 bucks of shit worth stealing, cuz her shit is just that, shit and junk.

 

i guess our memories suffer now instead of later