I am so confused please lead me in a direction

hey guys,

okay idk wats happening anymore with my life im sorry to bitch and rant and all that but i need to idk who else to talk to about it and theres some pretty smart people on here. Ive been mediatating and actually starting to have amazing sessions now, i kinda learned how to focus fully and really learned wat meditating was so i could understand more and it has helped so much my sessions go pretty good i get into this place where i feel like i am sleeping almost but im fully aware and theres no thoughts or anything its just awarness just pure peace and awarness its a great feeling however i talked to a co-worker about souls and wat it means to meditate and about life. MY question is what the hell am i? what am i doing here is meditating actually doing something i mean i believe it and i think theres souls in all of us or something more than just these physical bodies but how do i know thats true how do i know wat im doing is actually real and actually reaching the self. wat if there is no self. i dont want to think that when we die we just die and thats it i believe we come back our souls come back in another body but wtf I really dont know im just so confused about my life idk whats like real and not real. maybe its simple maybe we are just humans and we have to work and make money and thats our lives maybe thats it and maybe im just some kid trying to figure that theres more to life than all that but from what i see everyday it doesnt tell me what im thinking is right. I felt more joy and peace in everyday since i started my spiritual journey and it seems it cleared alot of things up in my life but now i think ive come to a fork. like my beliefs took me to a fork in the road and im kind of just standing at the fork looking down both roads. i wanna choose the spiritual road i really do but idk if it just looks good and theyll be a fucking ditch halfway down it. but if i take the "real" path ik my life would be superficial and i wont be nearly as happy. and i dont think i can just walk the middle of it cuz when you try to walk on a line at some point you lose your balance and fall a way you dont want to.

sorry for all that.

-Mike

 

Meditation is good for your neural networks because it relaxes them and allows them to rewire. Like defragmenting your hard-drive.
Don't expect anything from meditation. You just sit, and breathe.
The inner workings are subliminal.

You are many things. You are the star-shaped epitome of consciousness.

I practice exercising my awareness every single day because I know that when I die, if I want to make it to the next level and not be recycled like most people, I must remain aware even when I slip down,
down,
down.....

You have to break everything down into frequencies to see the truth.
Study the extremely low frequencies (ELF) that the brain emits.

Meditation is also good for the body because it reprograms all the bullshit.

Many people get frustrated because they expect something amazing out of meditation.... They just can't see what's going on.
Just keep going it. Every single day.

There's so much more to life than what this society has brainwashed you into believing.

Deep breaths through your nose...
Breathe in belly out
breathe out belly in

create a perfect rotation spinning in your belly brain

 

this is my problem with wat you said, you said it reprograms and theres more to life than wat society brainwashed you into thinking...but wat is that other thing like i think i know what it is but idk if its real!! ik wat society tells me is real but ik deep down its bullshit wats this other thing im looking for how will i know when i find it that i will be able to get it

 

Do you work with any plant teachers/medicines?

 

no im doing all this alone. i need someone to guide me im in this wonderful maze just walking aimlessly i need direction i think

 

I've always been on my own.

You are your own guru, your own best teacher.

Do you understand the chakra system?

When you open your crown you will understand this.
The divine white light will leak in thru your skull
yantras will assemble
you'll ask questions and they will be answered immediately without words....

I go into this mode by dancing all night on the beach, then meditating in the morning.
(Good dark psychedelic trance)

I also work with many plant teachers. They guide me every full moon.
Recalibrates the soul.

 

ik about the chakras but idk how to access them during meditation i thought the point was to not think and wouldnt i be breaking the whole routine if i thought about chakras?

 

You can trace every single one of your thoughts to a chakra.

Beware of each one and it's function
and be still.

Belly rhythmic breathing automatically gets your solar plexus spinning, which recalibrates your balace
and if you love, you will rise.
maybe even chant some mantras
and store the energy in your sacral
breathing out down into your roots, connected.

 

okay now if i wanted to work on my chakras should i start the the bottom one and work up? and when im at each one what am i thinking or focusing on? i read ppl saing that they focus energy and think about that swirling in each one but idk

 

Yeah when I meditate I run through them just to beware of them, and then I just sit and let everything fall into place.

Your root which is where kundalini lies and waits,
your root is where your mind deals with community, sustenance . .

if you look at the spine, it's one spectrum of a rainbow. root being red.
There's another spectrum above you, and below you

but that isn't you, so don't worry about that for now, just focus on your octave.

next up is the sacra chakra. your creative/sexual energy is cultivated and stored here.
Horny people who can't get sex off their mind are only thinking with this chakra.
Notice how when you ejaculate your mind changes? Orange.

Next is the solar plexus. Yellow. Balance. Activate this with rhythmic slow belly breathing (i described above) and also laying down and lifting my legs up stretching helps me feel the pulse.
If you're ever in a situation where you have to choose between fight or flight
this chakra automatically makes that decision.

Love, and your heart chakra blooms. Green. Just love, smile . .

Throat chakra deals with communication, intentions- blue

third eye is usually closed. opens up when you tune into other frequencies. allows you to see.

the crown is dormant unless you really work at cracking it.
when it's open, you will know.
you can literally look up and out of your head
into heaven . .

Google "endocrine glands" and you will see that the chakras even have corresponding biological mechanisms along the meridians.

Eat some mushrooms while you're at it in a dark safe place.

 

i love lsd and mushrooms im long overdue for a lsd trip to clear things up just cant get my hands on it at the moment.

 

S'all good. You will eventually. Until then, practice.
And breathe

 

thats was really good information by the way however now that you wrote all that and all the colors, now i know what they are and do how do i integrate that into my meditation?

 

Balance them
see how they apply to every single one of your thoughts
try and open your crown so you can gain some insight.

Meditation is just sitting and breathing.
I like to sing mantras in my head, or listen to my own neuroelectricity.
It's absolutely minimalization.

 

im sorry i keep asking questions im just trying to figure it out. so while im sitting there i just go to each one and wat exactly do you mean by balance?

 

This stuff is so hard to explain
I learned it all by sitting and listening.
Just sit with this information.

You can ask all the questions you want. I'm always asking questions all day.

 

okay well i will see wat i can do im sure with this information things will happen as they are supposed to. thanks so much for your help

 

anytime

 

thanks for that insight, i've been trying to understand the chakras but to no avail,

By the opening up of Chakras we can change lots of things right?

my throat chakra always used to be tight but thats changed,

LOVE

 

not really change, but be who you are in your fullest potential.

when you hold things back, your throat chakra blocks. gotta flow...

love