I think I did a very bad thing..

of course he is VERY mad at you. why wouldn't he be.

and wtf is your problem with his new gf?
what the hell did she do to you?

good job, you fucked up their relationship. (well actually he kinda did, but you're taking credit for it so...)

you need to fix yourself instead of wrecking shit around you

 

All of my anger and resentment/hatred, etc is misdirected. I can't hate him because I need to have some sort of relationship with him for Jade's sake. So I guess I just don't blame him for anything, and put it all on her. I know it's unhealthy though. Does that count for something?

I need to move on with my life. I know exactly what I need to do to find happiness, but I always do things to make myself unhappy. Always have been that way. Not sure why.

They are still ok.. As long as she believes his lies. So I haven't wrecked anything, though I did try to.

 

it seems to me like you see the problem but don't do anything to fix it. or worse yet, do the opposite.
i keep seeing shreds of hope in your posts and then a quick reversal back to stupidness.

still not trying to be a dick (although not trying too hard NOT to be one either)

i hope you work your shit out

 

then don't do it. and no that counts against you. knowing it's unhealthy but doing it anyway is worse than being ignorant.

yes you do (need to move on)
and if you know what you need to do, DO IT. or at least try. at least make a step in the right direction. if you think you need a guy to make you happy, well try to look for one (i understand that might be a lil difficult with your responsibilities)

at least don't let him keep playing you the way he is.

when he comes over and gets all touchy feely with you...make him stop.

(not sure why i have appointed myself as your online therapist)

 

I really hate how whenever people push their crotchs against someone elses, shit hits the fan somehow.

 

Look buddy, I'm not stupid. I am a woman with a **** and raging hormones. Like most women in this world, we do evil irrational things. I can't help that fact. I don't like most women in fact. That may also have something to do with why I don't blame him for the shit he does.

I'll work my shit out.. I know what to do. I've done it many times in the past. And tomorrow is a new day.

 

I do need therapy.

 

I wish my ex would've admitted that.