emergency

hi i am ugly, and drunk. and need to cum right now, I love blowjobs, even though i've never had one, and, bascially, what i'm wondering is, i read somewhere about stuff you can fuck, home made sex or something, i don't have any water melons, but does anyone know anything cool i can fuck that feels like a blowjob? i never use my hand and hate it. i always hump my pillow in bed but it's no fun anymore. someone must know some instant relief method which feels really good

 

I hear the garbage disposal is really hot.

 

Hehe well done

 

heh I wonder what he decided to use...but also scared to know.

 

as the americans say , use a pie...AMERICAN pie...

hehe

 

Try heating a piece of liver in the microwave!

hehehe