"I Can't Come In To Work Today Because..."

Im making pot brownies

 

I'm going over to Born25YearsTooLate's and watch him make hash.

 

im 2 sroned

 

Been smoking Born25YearsTooLate's hash and I may not be in tomorrow either.

 

I have a golf date.

 

Just want to see what you'll do without me.

 

I've morphed into Mothra and must go fight godzilla....

 

because my dog barfed in my only pair of shoes

 

If I fall asleep these seed pod thingies will take over my body and I know if I come in to work I just know I'll fall asleep.

 

it's the day that I worship Schneider from, One Day at a Time and spank my ass with a spatula whilist eating peanut butter and listening to the theme song...

 

I am having my teeth removed.

 

I'm having crummy's teeth implanted in my mouth and ditching the chicklets...(which I will be selling on ebay)

 

I am watching an auction on ebay, gonna get me some chicklets.

 

I just woke up after sampling the hash I made for OWB

 

Because My 10 year old little bastard stole my truck

 

cuz i sleep walked to nebraska

 

I'm watching paint dry.

 

im in jail.

 

I have to take a shower today.

 

I have to get my back hair braided into cornrows.