Right so ive been with my gf for about 5 months and we never argue. But we are now. Im sleeping over friday night and going saturday morning, my driving theory test is on Tues and i need to revise for it. She wants me to go town with her Sat afternoon but i dont want to because i need to revise the theory, so she is being all awkward and over the top because i cant go town with her on Sat. Why is she being immature about it?
Beats me. But minor annoyances like this are bound to come up in your relationship no matter how well you get along.
Nah i decided not to stay at all, she said she was trying not to cry because i said something like, "we can meet up all the time in the summer holidays, but i feel like we might not even last until then".
You feel you might not last until then because you had one argument after five months of happily getting along?
Don't you think when you start feeling a little guilty for not being with your g/f b/f then you have to start considering the state of the relationship?
thing like this will come up ALOT learn to chose the battles carefully and the rest just nod and agree but explain your point and do what you gotta do. if both of you can over look the petty fights and be happy together then so be it. every relationship isnt always perfect. hell i know mine is FAR from perfect every other day we bicker about something or other and that happens cuz we're upset about something and just making it noted tothe other person so dont end the relationship because of some stupid lil bicker.
Well Odon, let's review what the OP said: If I were in the same situation yes I'd feel guilty. But I don't see why I should take that as a sign that the relationship might not last. I mean come on! Couples argue - they get annoyed with each other, and then they feel guilty about that so they make up and everything's okay again. I just fail to see why he'd consider such an idea when it was only one petty argument over their not being together on saturday. And this was their first argument in five months.
You are right, I think it was only a half thought through response on my part. He is seeing the situation slightly black and white, and is slightly defeatist. But, I think I was just considering, there may be other underlying factors. I remember when I stopped instinctively wanting to spend time with my my ex, come hell or high water, I did question the relationship. We too never really argued. Which is not always healthy.
Im not worried about her leaving me, i doubt she would ever do that unless i did something terrible. But she wanted me to apologize but i didnt because i really didnt think i was in the wrong at all. I still dont think i am, she went so over the top about it.
Maybe she did, I don't know. She does sound a little clingy. Stepping into your g/fs shoes for a minute. She may think, if your test is on Tuesday; you have part of Saturday, Sunday, Monday and part of Tuesday. The best part 4 days to revise. Maybe she thought your 'excuse' was a little lame . No offence, just attempting to see it from her perspective. I appreciate every situation is nuanced, so I can't confidently know the whole situation. On the face of it. I'd have not gone around on Friday, as it may appear I just wanted one thing (sex). And then possibly gone with her on Saturday. Or not seen her till after the test. It is a tricky dilemma, for sure. I hope the situation irons itself out.
It isnt lame, i havnt revised for it much and there are like 3000 questions and 2000 video clips to go through. I said i would meet her after the exam on Tuesday, she seems to think she can see me when she wants but it doesnt work like that.
Fair enough. I won't come down on you about 'time management' as mine sucks . She obviously loves you, she wants to be with you as much as possible. Grab it, when she does not, your attitude may change. But, I understand that you can't be together when ever the other person wants. That is unrealistic, I accept that. I hope you pass after all of this
Sometimes it's okay to apologize even if you don't believe you were in the wrong. Apology does not necessarily mean admitting you were wrong - it can simply mean that you acknowledge your actions and words hurt her though that was not your intention. You need to clarify to her though why you're apologizing - that you still don't believe you're wrong, and you're both just going to have to agree to disagree.
