Hiphiphippy's poetry

Beauty

My girlfriend might not be what society calls beauty
But maybe beauty isn't what it seems
What I'm trying to say is
Maybe beauty isn't that stereotypical, socially and
politically correct, mainstream media, pop culture,
too fat, too skinny, corporate corruption bullshit, fad
prefabricated image
Of what beauty is supposedly supposed to be
Fuck that shit man!
Beauty is what you make of it!
Anything/Anyone can be beautiful in someone elses mind
Beauty is what you make of it!

 

3 weeks

3 weeks
Is that enough time to fall in love
Earlier on in my life I would have said no
Then I met her

Alyshea Ellen Turner
Such a godess, diva-like name,How fitting
After all the hardships and heartbreak of my life so far
I thought I would never have been able to love again ever
I thought I would just waste away
For the rest of my existence
Alone
Then she came

So much in common we have
Both so scared
Of love this quick and easy
But also both amazed,Jaded, lucky
lucky to be alive
lucky to be toghether
lucky to be different

Can you feel my love buzz?
I love her so much It hurts
Almost makes me sick
I love her so much, I do
Finally she believes me
3 weeks

 

Feelings

Feelings, nothing more than feelings
This is crazy
Everyone around me is pissed at someone/thing
Or so it seems

Everything sucks now
I`m stuck in the middle
So many feelings
because of it all
Too many feelings
My love is the only sane one left with me
And she might be joining them too

Everything sucks now
Everyone is pissed
I`m losing my love

She`s slowly slipping,falling away from me
Away and away
Down and down
Down and away
Away and down
Our love is dying, rotting and falling apart
Must do something, but what
Falling to its tragic demise iminent

What to do
To calm everyone down
I dont know
Get some new friends, a new life
Maybe I can use all these excess feeling to figure something out

Everything sucks now
Everyone is pissed
Good old
Feelings!

 

Hate

Hate, what a word
To me it is a word in which it has no meaning
There is no hate in me
Except the hate for, Hate itself
Don't laugh too hard, its true
Hate-free
No hate whatsoever

It might look like I have some in me
But thats anger
Hate, Anger, 2 different things

There is so much hatred towards me
I just couldn't do that to anyone else
Cause I know the feeling of being hated
No one deserves that

I just get angry a lot at people
But I don``t hate them
I`m not going to stoop to their level

But it takes alot to get me angry
Hate is a selfish waste of emotional energy
Pointless

So many of the worlds problems
Because of hate

No hate
No problems

My so called "hate" may be often confused
With my sensitivity and harshness
I'm a sensitive, emotional, person
And its cause of that that I'm so harsh with people sometimes
People who hurt me, piss me off or fuck with me
I dont hate them

no one deserves to be hated
I`m a lover not a hater

Love
not
Hate

 

Labels

I`m a hippy
I`m a stoner
I`m a punk
I`m a metal-head
I`m a freak
I`m insane
I`m crazy
I'm sick
I'm twistes
I'm a lover
I'm not a hater
I'm an optimist
I'm not a pessimist
I'm not racist
I'm not sexist
I'm not prejudice
I don't judge
I don't label

Labels are too confining for people
All the Im's above are labels I've gottan from people

I'm all that and more
I'm me
I'm human too!

Fuck Labels!
Labels

 

Life

Life sucks, everyone knows that
Too many things going on In this life at the moment
Makes me even more of a troubled soul

Didnt all you know?
People ask me why I care
I'm asking the same question
Everyone asking me for advice all at once
Asking what they should do
And what they shouldnt
And what its going to be like in both situations
Why me?

Every word, every chance for this soul to cry out
Every murderous though, every painful moment
Why me?

People walk all over me
Use me for advice
Think I'm wrothless except for the purpose of advice
they make fun of me
Try to fuck with my head
Can't I get some advice once in a while

Fuck you you mind sluts!Fuck you!
Fuck them!Fuck them all!
Fuck them up theyre stupid asses!
Fuck me!Fuck you!
Fuck everyone and everything!

God damn these voices inside my head
Too many thoughts
For this troubled soul who needs to cry out
Who worries too much and cares too much
Who's too sensitive, too much of a caring, loving baby!

No one knows it,No one realizes it
No one understands it,No one
No one know the inner me, No one cares about it
I do, I do worry, I do care, I do love
Too many thoughts, too many feelings
Why me?

I don't get it, what have I done
To be cursed with such a wretched, evil thing
Tearing up the very essence of its vehicle
God damn this curse
Why me?

Why must this demon consume me?
Why must you taunt me?
The fear of not knowing why tears into my essence like a
Gulloitine to butter
I hate it, I hate this curse as I hate, hate itself
Its a curse, remember
No one knows it, except for the victim

Birth is pain
Life is pain
Death is pain
Its all the same

Need something/someone
To relieve this pain
To cure this curse

Music?......No
Writing?....No
Poetry?.....No
Love?? Maybe
Love? Yes

Who will love me though?
Who can I love?

Love is life
Life is Love
Love is Love
Life is life

Live Life
Love love

Love

Life!

 

Maniac

Such a loving, caring, sensitive, friendly
Harsh, angry, confused flipping maniac
I have 2 sides, no middle

I'm a good guy until you piss me off
It takes a lot to piss me off
But when people do, I snap

So much love and kindness gotta hug someone.
So much anger and supposed hatred gotta stab someone

2 sides to this maniac
I should be in a mental institution, a nut house
I'm turning into such a skitzo freak for fuck sakes
Angry, harsh fucker vs. nice, loving fucker

Which one will win?
I should be thankful I don't have a 3rd one in between them both
Multiple personalities are weird
Who would've thought?

You stupid fuck, you're a fucking maniac for fuck sakes
You can't handle it
Why don't you just go kill yourself now you waste of sperm and eggs
Why are you here? Get the fuck outta here
I'm the dominant one here

No your not
Can't we all just get along man
Its killing our host/vehicle
I'm nice your Angry
Why can't we find a balance, a middle
And learn not to switch so drastically
I love you
Why can't you understand I'm not a maniac here you are
Lets just work together before we destroy our host

Fuck you! You did this to us! You did it! Its your fault!
Multiple personalities, skitzo freaking maniac

What caused this?
Love then no love
Hate then no hate
School then no school
Rules then no rules
Everything changes

I guess the nice personality is the one I had before
I got my heart broken so many times
The mean personality is the one after that
I think thats where it started, it was my fault, I deserved it
I still kinda lover her too, I`m such an obsessive maniac

Thats when I started writing
God look at what I have become, such a loser
Such a crazy maniac fucking Ready to go kill someone I love
Man!!!!!No!Don`t Do It!!!!!!!!!!!
Maniac

 

Manic confusion

So confused
Falling in love again
With 2 people this time though
I wish I could please them both without hurting anyone
I've already gone out with both of them
And I dumped them both

I wish I could have one of the 3 loves of my life back
But I only trust one of them and she ended it too soon
My fault that one I admit it
3 real loves in my life, a couple months they all lasted
Lisa Vanexan
Samantha Taylor
Alyshea Turner
I loved them so deeply, I could never dump them
They ended it of course
Good times all 3
I still kinda love them all

I'm falling for 2 girls now though
Society doesn't respect nor understand having more than one partner
So I guess I'm fucked, I gotta choose between two potential loves
Amimy Durpos and Amanda Brown

I'm falling for them both god damnit
So confused, in a state of
Manic Confusion

Maybe I should just say fuck it and
Take a break from lovein for a while
Until I get my life back together
Get this shit straightened out
They'll Understand right? Wrong!!!

Actually, I don't know anymore
Manic Confusion

I'll figure something out
Manic Confusion

 

No reason


They hate and are pissed at me for no reason
They blame it all on me as its my fault
I didnt do anything to them, still they blame and taunt me
Ever so pushing, pushing on my last nerves
They wanna fuck with me? Try to make my life hell?
For nothing, I didn't do anything

Fuck them! Fuck them up they're stupid asses
I'll beat the fuck outta Jon, Gerald
Then that Brandon kid for fun
Put all 3 of em' in intensive care

Get some of my friends to beat up Alyshea and Tilla
So they can join the other 3 in intensive care
Put them in the same hospital
Pay them all a visit, flowers cards
Then I'll break out with the guns, finish the job off
Paint the walls with their blood
Pull the plug on their last lifeline

Burn they`re houses down to the motherfuckin ground
Wait outside with a shotgun so when they`re families run out panicking and shit
I`ll blow them in half
Put sugar in their gas tanks, blow the shit out of all their piece of shit cars
Kill they`re family and friends
So they can all burn in hell together
Burning, getting tortured by demons for the rest of eternity

Stab them, stab them and stab them again, take the kinife out
Lick the blood off it in front of their face before they die so it`ll be the last thing they`ll see
Kill them all, spit on them, beat up all their friends
Burn all the bodies

Find all of them one at a time, rip their still beating heart out of their chest
Hold it in front of their face to see how black it is before it dies
Split it in 2, force feed it to them both ways on fire
So theyre stomach may becoming nausceous and burning as mine is
Laugh
Laugh
Laugh
Laugh
hahahaahahahaahahahahahaa
Poke fun at their misfortune as they do to me

Violence, blood,guts gore
Tear through theyre flesh, giving way to blood
Just as they tear at my heart, giving way to tears
So much anger

They brought this on themselves
Still they push, push, push on my last nerves
They started it not me
I`m trying to finish it
I`m not going to stoop to their level but its kinda hard
The level of a hateful, unknowing, judging fuckhead
Thats the level with alot of people these days though

I will get my revenge
I will get them
And then I`ll get me
After all the homicides I`ll try suicide
See if that works
They will all die
I will destroy them all!
It will happen
And when it does
It will be a glorious day in which I will be victorious
And the mind sluts will perish a mindless, painful torture filled death
No reason

 

Nothing

Nobody loves me
Nobody cares
Nobody gives a flying fuck about me
Nobody cares
Why not?
What did I do to deserve all of this?

Everyone hates me
Everything sucks
Everyone pokes fun at my expense

Why doesn't anyone love me?
Why doesn't anyone care?
Why doesn't anyone give a flying fuck about me?
Why doesnt anyone care?
Why does everyone hate me?
Why do they all torment me?
Why don't they trust me?
Whats wrong with me?

So many questions waiting to be answered
I'm different I know, everyone is though
Lifes a bitch, especially for me though
Lifes a bitch, fuck it
The time has come to pay
Pay for what?

Pay for my pain
You'll all pay
Pay for my pain
Pay for my nothingness
Pay for what?
Pay for nothing

Cause thats all I got
Nothing

 

Pain

Don`t believe it all
Dont believe all my supposed happiness, content and utter joy
That is a part of me yes
For I am full of emotional anguish, anger, pain and sadness
Both sides are existent
I think the pain overpowers sometimes
But what do I know
I complain too much
Why do people hate me so?
It only adds to my pain
One day, I'm afraid the pain will be too much
And I'm going to be foreced to snap
End up in jail, or dead
Why me?
So...so..so much pain
Why do I have to be the
sad, emotional, moody, eratic person with too much passion
If I wasn't
i'd be like everyone else
i guess
I'm different and its a good thing, I'm glad
But so much pain comes with it
Almost too much pain
Smothering, drowning, slowly dragging me down
Killing me
Writing helps take away the pain a bit
Its like emotional pain killers
But like all drugs
They all eventually wear off
And your left feeling the same or worse about it then before
We all have pain
Its just about how we deal with it
Everyones way to deal with it is different
Most people are numb
I'm not
Everything hurts
Oh well
whatever
Nevermind
Trying to deal with it
Pain!

 

People

People hate
People love
People live
People cry
People laugh, think and fuck
People die
People rot
Fuck People!
Kiss my ass People
I love you People
See you in hell People!

 

Peaceful Trip


I'm in a happy mood, more so than usual
Sitting here drinking tea, writing poetry,
Listening to my chamber music
Nirvanas Unplugged album of course
I feel no anger a this moment
No reason to
The only thing I don`t like about it is
I`m not sharing it with anyone I love
Oh Well, I`m still here
Thyre will be plenty of romantic moments
To share in the future
With ones I love
It will be glorious
Why can`t all moments be like this
I am in a state of utter happiness
I`m so heppy it hurts
Its a good kind of hurt
The place I`m in isn`t that beautiful
But it`s my sanctuary, my room
But right at this moment it almost feels beatiful
Nothing can touch me
No one can ruin this moment
no negative thoughts running through my head
Just positive, peaceful ones
Ones filled with love, hugs and kisses
This world is a beautiful, wonderful place
I would hate to leave it
Too soon
I`m not afraid of death
But I`m not going out
On my own will just yet
Maybe later on though
When I can`t take it anymore
Too young yet
Only 17
I can still take it
But when I do go out
I`ll go out with style, Believe me
Maybe 10 years left 20, or maybe even 30
I don't know
We'll see how it goes
I don't want to suffer through life too much
So when it is time to go out
Whenpain and suffereing
Are too much
I will go out
On my own will
But with style
I don't want to go out yet
Too happy
Too peaceful
Maybe later
These monments right here, so peaceful
The words don't scream anymore
They flow
Like a mountain stream in springtime
They flow onto the peper with such ease
No more screaming
Just easy flowing, flowing with ease
Cool, Far Out, Groovy, Psychodelic
Almost hazy its all so beautiful
Wanna stay in these moments
Forever:A really long time
Peace Love Empathy Freedom
Thats what I need
Make love, not war
Can't we all just get along and give peace a chance
If we can, far out, groovy even
If we can't, fuck you too, at least I can say I tryed
What all the haters don't realize is that if we had more
Peace, Love emapthy and freedom in this world
This world would become somewhat of a better place
So why not eh? You see
All you kats who hate out theyre
What the fuck do you think you're doing?
Not to sound harsh or anything
But you're ruining our world
Oh well, do what you want
I'm too at peace with my own life
To care too much about what you do with yours
Peace love freedom
OR
War, hate and prohibition
You choose
I've already chose for myself
I've picked the first group obviously
peace not war
love not hate
Empathy not selfishness
Freedom not prohibition
I love everything, everyone, no exceptions
I might say I hate sometimes
But that just me getting angry
I cant hate, nor can I hold a grudge, why try?
whats the point of doing so?
I'm too much of an optimist
To bring negative things into my life
I'm too much of a lover, not a hater
Such a peaceful bunch of moments
Peaceful trip
Tea, music, writing, poetry
The only things that would make it perfect would be
A lover, someone toshare these peaceful moments with
white candles
white lilies
some marijuana
a hippie van
some black sabbath music and
a good fuck
Thatd be perfection
Thatd be great
This is great too though
I feel no pain right here at this moment
No confusion or headaches
Perfection
But nothings perfect
Peaceful Trip
My stomach doesnt burn tonite
It is quiet and peaceful
As everything else is
God such beauty I thought was only wrote about in books
but not actually humanly possible
I guess I was wrong
Nobodys perfect
Peaceful trip
The peaceful trip is fading
The musics coming to an end
The pens running out of ink
The books running out of paper
The cup of tea is almost empty
The writer is getting tired
Peaceful trip
Nothing is perfect
Nobody is perfect
Nothing gold can stay
Nothing lasts forever
Not even
peace, love, empathy, freedom,
sex, drugs, rock and roll
tea, a hippie van, writing
white lilies, white candles, not even my
Peaceful Trip lasts forever
What a shame, such a shame
I'm going to miss it
Oh well, I'm still happy
There will be other times like this
Peaceful Trip

 

Until I met her

I was in love once
Real returned love
Real, Just like me
People just Don't get me
They don't think I can love
I didn't i could either,

Until I met her

We were together only a couple of months
Earlier, I would've thought i couldn't have fallen
So deeply in love so quick

Until I met her

The first and only person I've had sex with in my 17 years on this planet
And oh did she make it perfect, she made it love
If she is reading this or not I care not,She doesn't know me
She accuses me of not caring when she left me
She doesn't believe my painful broken heart,
If she does she ignores it ,And yet she still hurts me
Pulverizes my heart into grains of sand
Fucks with my head, so both are useless
Thats all I have really, my heart and my head
Thats all I needed,

Until I met her

I'm real, I've always been
A sensitive, caring, emotional, moody person
Who loves to write and love
this is coming from a true poet, sonwriter, writer
A visionary who wants to make a difference
A person who want to be a hero to someone else
just a person
Who loves another person
A broken heart and soul
Like a dove with a broken wing that can't fly anymore
Like a wild dog
Thats been domesticated and has lost its bark
A broken heart and soul
just like the dog and the dove
I'm just a person whose lost their love
It didn't need to end like this,

Until I met her

I want so bad to go back before the borken heart and soul
Before all this fucking bullshit she's putting me through
I didn't want to go back,
Until I met her
She betrayed me, yes
I am willing to forgive her, forget this betrayal
I still love her
Everyone makes mistakes, hell, even me
but the questions are:
Is she willing to forgive herself?
Does she still love me?
Why has she hurt me? Broken my heart and soul
Why does she still hurt me?
So many questions to question
Questions to answer
Answers to Answer and
Answers to question
I didn't have so many
I didn't want to forget

Until I met her

As I sit here pouring my thoughts onto paper with ink
As the words scream at me to be written down
My head, heart and soul all scream along with these words
Screams of love, confusion and longing
All this screaming!
Too much screaming!
They didn't scream,

Until I met her

 

To love another

What is it to love another?
What is it really?
Unconditionally
I loved another once
I really loved her, unconditionally
Those were the days
She was the perfect specimen of being
I had her
I lost her
I still love her
She doesn't love me
I'm searching for another
As my search goes on
I'm starting to think that there will never be
Another
Another to love
Maybe more than her
But alas I keep hoping
Hoping that one day I will be reunited with her
I probably won`t
She won`t have it
Never again
Never again will I kiss her sweet lips
Never again will I hold her precious hand
Never again will I dance slowly with her
Never again will I hold her in my arms
Never again will I look in her eyes and see the love
Never again
All these Never again`s
My fault
She hates me
Not loves me
I usually don`t have regrets
But this time I regret this
From the very pit of my burning,nausceous stomach
What I did to her
Broke her heart
I really loved her
I loved her more than my life itself
More then the world and everyone here
If I were given the chance to achieve world peace
But to do it I would have to kill her
I couldn`t bring myself to do it
I wouldn`t bring myself to do it
Every second I'm with her
I'm truly happy
I had that
I had all that
I lost it
My fault
Never again
To love another

 

So/Too Fucked Up

Everyone hates me now so fucked up

What did I do? Nothing
Whats the point of my existence without love?

When everybody hates me now? So fucked up

Love is love,Love is life
Life is life, Life is love
So many questions and too emotional, again with this curse
Witout love, life is meaningless
If there were no more love in the world for me
I'd still be writing, lots to write about then
Like how shitty it is without any love and when

Everyone hates me now so fucked up

Love is what turns the world, It stops in awe of it
Love is a powerful thing, too bad I can't find it
I thought I could and did find it
But no way, it was just false love
True love is the mutual feeling between 2 people
I haven't found that yet, maybe I'm trying to hard
Maybe love is just a fairy tale like god, Santa Claus and the easter bunny
The people I`ve loved haven`t loved me back
They said they did: Lies all Lies!!!!!
They either betrayed me or ended it too soon
Lies all lies, Lies hurt

Everyone hates me now so fucked up

Why would they lie and hurt me?
I gave them my love...Why?
Too many questions

Everyone hates me now so fucked up, too fucked up

Too emotional, slowly slipping, to my tragic demise
Why? Too many questions
Not enough Answers
Too much love for people
Not enough returned love
Too much to say
Not enough people to take me serious and actually listen
Too much, not enough: such contradictions
My life itself is a contradiction, a hypocrisy

Everyone hates me now so fucked up
Too fucked up, too many questions
So fucked up, too fucked up

 

I enjoyed the message. You convey your thoughts, feelings and concepts
very well. Very personal poetry.

 

In this world of duality we all experience both poles of perception. Trust is learning how to make yourself whole, be the witness who seeing but is beyond what is seen, accepting both. I've written a poem called 'Manic Depression' under 'Radiant Center,' perhaps you will find solace in knowing that others experience tidal surges of emotions. Poetry is a great medium for letting your thoughts, feelings and inspirations flow. Some of my best works are impartial, without me in them at all, observations of my interconnection with all that is. We are all part of one energy. Much love.

 

yeah. it's very awesome coz it's honestly written. conveys a lot of inward pain....good expression of self, whether it be tre or not, my think is that it is true. ow. reflects humans generally. uh. very depressing, but good.

 

You dont think I know that! Im just expressing myself, I'm not really trying to be a good poet or anything.