What have you stuck it in?

When you are trying to masturbate, what's the wildest thing you've ever stuck your penis in? Toilet paper roll? between the couch cushions?

 

My fist. Masturbation, to me, is like fast food. Its good when you really need it, but its not an event.

I understand and that people get into masturbation as a total form of sexual gratification and go to lengths to make the experience as pleasurable as possible. Its just not something I'm into. Lube, a fist, and a kleenex is fine for me.

I'm way more into partner play.

More power to you, though.

Cheers

 

You dont even wanna know -_- .. Ive tried so many things to make a "home-made" flesh light .. i need to order the real one lol.

 

Walnut tree.Good barkin'.

 

One of the jets in my spa broke once and occasionly sucked in.... you can guess What I did from there =)

 

NO NO NO NO

Guys, don't get tempted and stick your dick into any mechanical vacuum/pump mechanism. Guys have gotten caught in the pool suction holes - now that is embarrassing, having the fire department free you from the pool!

NEVER NEVER stick your dick in a vacuum cleaner tube. One guy made the news when he had the skin cleaned right off his dick.

Stick with your hand or rubbing up against a cushion or something, but be careful

 

And NO milking machines.

 

I know I'm a girl and this isnt exactly my "forte" or whatever that word is, But Shale is right NEVER, I repeat NEVER stick your dick in a vacuum cleaner. My cousin works at a hospital in Detroit and there was this old guy who had a heartattack because he was trying to pleasure himself with the vacuum hose and I guess too much blood went to his, um, member. They found him keeled over on the floor, dead,the vacuum still running.


I swear on my life this is a true story. Boys, beware of anything with a motor.Should be common sense, but then again, you never know these days.

 

I once tried a loaf of banana bread. But it smelled to good so I ate it, then I called my chick up she came over and we ate banana bread and fucked all day . I think it worked out good.

Peace

 

Hey that's the way!

 

Raw ground meat. Felt really nasty.

 

If you need some mastrabation ideas, just ask me, i've got tons for boys and girls.

 

And afterward? Just press it out with some onions and fry it into hamburgers. No one will notice.

 

In the days before I invested in the FleshLight I had a home made toy of my own, made as follows:

The foam rubber, taken from the cushion of an old chair / sofa, sliced in 2.

Wrap each length securely in Cling Film, several layers over, for strength.

Bind each end with masking / parcel / duct tape - varying how much you want to bind to determine the size of the ultimate 'vagina' you require.

Once lubricated (water based lubes - no oil based products or that would affect the integrity of the Cling Film), this can serve to act as quite a realistic vagina for masturbation purposes, and obviously well within anyone's budget - although a bit difficult to explain away if found.

 

waterwing works well

 

i've gotten off in a jar of peanut butter before

 

Lol, some of these are hilarious, I guess the wierdest I've stuck it in was a donut, it was just so obvious that I had to try it.

 

Between two pillows. I wanna get a flesh light. : p

 

when I was younger I had this huge football I made in jr. high school..it was sewn together and stuffed with cotton...i used to throw it around and one day it ripped at the end a little bit...when I first started masturbating I decided to stick it in and bang it like it was a chick...it was great no clean up and I used to think I was banging all the hot girls in my school

 

Hmmm. Pudding I think, and a house slipper ...I got bored. I've also tried sandwich bags filled with baby oil stuck inbetween the couch cushions, didn't work that well. I've yet to find anything that works as well as a fake vagina.