Suggestions for dealing with death.

Its been almost 2 years since my father(51) died of liver cirrhosis, and I thought I was doing well dealing with it, but its definitely been bothering me lately. I have this bad habit of trying to forget about problems or situations in my life, and not dealing with them when they need to be delt with.(Bottling up emotions.) Psycology, I tried one session and walked out 30mins. in, it just seemed to textbook for me. My spirituality is lacking a bit too I think; my soul aches, and its messing with my mind and body. Any suggestions?

 

The first thing you have to understand is that death is a part of life.

The second thing to understand is you can't do anything about it.

Grieving over a loved one takes a long time for most people. Time is really the only thing that will make the ache a little less noticable. Two years for you isn't enough.

As you involve yourself more in life, there will be other things that will demand your attention. This is a good thing for those who cling to the past.

You'll let go when you're ready.



x

 

I agree with x - try to get interested in life.

Without knowing more about where you are spiritually, it's hard to give much advice.

Generally, if you've never read the Bhagavad Gita, I'd advise that, because in it, Krishna explains much about life and death in a context set against the sometimes harsh life situations we have to face. Here's a short quote to give you some idea:

"This (the soul) is not born, nor does it die, nor is it a thing that comes into being once and passing away will never come into being again. It is unborn, ancient, sempiternal; it is not slain with the slaying of the body."

Hope that is of some help.

 

I am like you. I tend to shove things way in the back of my mind somewhere and choose not to deal, I have done this for years with certain things, its scary. I think you need to find that part of you that aches and let it out - it will be very painful and may take some time to heal once the emotions start pouring out, but you will feel better in the long run.
I would suggest confronting your painful memories by submersing yourself with stuff about your father. Allow yourself to cry. Pick a couple of times per week where you just sit there and look at old photos. Remember good things, bad things, it doesn't matter. Just take the time to think about them and let your emotions pour out. Make yourself cry for 30 minutes straight. I believe we have "pain bodies" (http://www.cellularmemory.org/about/painbody.html) (http://ezinearticles.com/?Reflections-On-Eckhart-Tolles-Concept-Of-The-Pain-Body&id=14317) that manifest themselves within painful memories. We just don't realize it and we don't let go of them because we increase our tolerance to pain by keeping them, it becomes more and more normal to carry the pain. They feed on themselves with the pain that we continue to harbor and keep living inside our bodies.
You must allow all of your emotions to come out properly before you truly get over anything. Good luck and please let me know how you are doing.